A librarian replies to a comment piece in the Daily Californian:
Please don’t fuck in the library. I work here. My staff works here.
The piece in question is by UC Berkeley student Nadia Cho, who seems to believe she’s very edgy and progressive. In fact, it’s difficult to overstate just how edgy and progressive our columnist believes she is:
We decided that, out of the millions of books in the library, the shelves full of books on religion seemed like the best place to fuck.
How incredibly, desperately transgressive. Ms Cho gleefully explains that she and her companions are “desecrating” buildings with their “perverse ways.” You see, the sex she’s having is much more radical than yours, and therefore more important.
The risk of getting caught is what makes having sex in public so exciting. Without that, there wouldn’t be any novelty in doing it.
Indeed. And what’s the point of exhibitionist psychodrama without an audience? We’ve been here before, I think.
Thankfully, the author also obliges with some practical tips:
It’s best to have some empty shelves toward the bottom so that you can climb them and feel like Spider-Man while your partner penetrates you standing up.
It’s probably not a good idea to ejaculate in public places — just saying.
Of course it’s not just a matter of sexual abandon and incriminating evidence. It’s political too. Very political:
Berkeley is the best place to explore your sexuality. Our school is a predominantly safe and accepting space with many places, people and resources to help you discover your sexual self. It is the place where I learned what it means to be queer, to recognise the presence of patriarchy, to attempt polyamory and to become more confident in my sexuality so I could go ahead with new experiences — attending naked parties and orgies and writing a sex column, just to name a few.
Tuition fees well spent, then.
The studiously uninhibited Ms Cho is keen to educate the rest of us in matters sexual and political. She tells us, for instance, that, “Sex-positive isn’t a term that most people are familiar with. Look it up, learn and be amazed.” Suitably amazed and quaking with excitement, Ms Cho shares her insights: “Sex-positive is a concept, a culture and a state of mind… It is a view based on acceptance, communication, zero judgement...” Judgement is recurring motif in Ms Cho’s sexual sermons and we are told, more than once, that, “It’s extremely insensitive to berate a person’s intimate experiences,” and that, “It feels good to internalise the belief that you deserve to be respected for your personal decisions and that you’re not doing anything wrong in doing what feels right for you.” And hence, presumably, the shagging in public libraries and issues of tissue. Though if sexual transgression really is Ms Cho’s thing, as she’d like us to believe, surely the university’s Islamic Society would be an even more thrilling and edgy venue. Imagine the suspense, the transgression, the thrill of being caught “desecrating” the prayer mats. Or would that be the wrong kind of heteronormative patriarchy to rail against?
The fact that I happen to be a woman of colour might have something to do with it.
Ms Cho’s previous contributions to human knowledge include, “The thought of being in a [monogamous] relationship scares the living shit out of me,” and a stern reminder that while having “fucking intense, mind-blowing sex,” her partners “need to acknowledge and understand their positions and privileges relative to mine.” Which sounds like a recipe for the hottest, edgiest, most radical sex ever.
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