They Hum at Night
Friday Ephemera



God that was fast!


Look about right though I haven't seen the Rambo films. Was X-Men 3 that bad?


“Was X-Men 3 that bad?”

Not *that* bad, I think, but bad enough. Mainly due to some clumsy writing and the magnificent Famke Janssen being reduced to acting like a sulky, premenstrual supermodel. That said, the “de-aging” flashback intro was clever and the levitating house was fun. Oh, and Magneto’s one-man roadblock was pretty entertaining too. But it falls apart at the end.


Some of these films are not trilogies. Even if you allow the lapse of time for Star Wars and Indiana Jones, I recall more than 3 apes movies. Ditto Star Trek and Aliens

Off the cuff

Star Wars 3 was far worse - trilogy profile should be as Godfather

Mad Max 3 better than 1 - I don't think so. Tina Turner acts like she sings - no pacing. We're at the crescendo in the first bar.

Terminator 1 was a low budget success. I forgive its weaknesses over 2

Ditto Aliens


And Vinnie fucking Jones.


“I recall more than 3 apes movies.”

Didn’t they finally burn out with “Return to the Battle of the Conquest of the Underground of the Apes,” or something? It all blurs with the dodgy TV series.


“Was X-Men 3 that bad?”

Yes. Oh, god, yes...

And am I imagining things, or was there the most horrendous continuity error in it?


And how does Jaws III get rated at all, never mind higher than Jaws II...?



I don’t know about continuity errors, but maybe that’s because Brett “bang ‘em out” Ratner somehow managed to flatten almost every dramatic moment. (Scott’s off-camera death springs to mind. It sort of gets forgotten about.) Given the scope of the original comic and the audience goodwill established by the first two films, that’s no small achievement.

And, yes, Vinnie fucking Jones...


"And am I imagining things, or was there the most horrendous continuity error in it?"

Day turns into night in about 2 seconds.


"Day turns into night in about 2 seconds."

Yup, that's the one! Magneto rips the section of Golden Gate Bridge out (in broad daylight) to ride across to Alcatraz - when he arrives, it's pitch black. Given that you can practically hit Alcatraz with a rock from the shore, you have to wonder why it apparantly took so long. Getting coffee to go...?

I can never figure out how they missed that in editing. Did they think no-one would notice? Did they not care if anyone did?

"(Scott’s off-camera death springs to mind. It’s sort of gets forgotten about.)"

The whole thing is sloppy, isn't it? Pity, because I'll probably watch them all again before I go see 'Wolverine' in May... *sigh*



X2 is by far the best of the three. The final shot – of something familiar glimpsed in the water – is the perfect set-up for the third film. The nerdlings were very excited by the prospect of some heavy duty Phoenix action. Sadly, Ratner never delivers on that promise, either in terms of character or visuals. Ratner also throws away the chemistry between Magneto and Mystique, which was a big part of the series’ charm.

carbon based lifeform

Still funny...


LOL "his movements are inexplicably erratic…"

Horace Dunn

There is a masochistic streak in me that makes me want to confess to everyone that I thought that Terminator 3 was the best of the trilogy.

No. Hold on. Nothing to do with masochism. We're talking about justice here. It WAS the best of the three and I'm going to fight for that recognition.

(like anybody really cares)


I haven't seen it yet, but I know it's universally reviled by the fans of the first two. So I congratulate you on your brave stance..!


Horace is clearly suffering from a bout of cinematic brain fever. Fortunately, we’re a forgiving crowd. Things could so easily have turned ugly.

Horace Dunn

One day the world will understand. That's all I'm prepared to say on the topic. Thank you.


T3 seemed like a solid movie. The story arc was intellectually satisfying, though the film fell a bit flat on hitting any emotional buttons. My theory as to why it isn't recognized as being of the calibur of the first two films is that it doesn't try to do anything really new. That and the ending is one of the best "fuck the audience" moments in film.

I feel it's about as good as T1.


[ cough ] Brain fever. [ cough ]


To show I am suffering from Brain Fever, I also think Matrix 2 was a fine, fine movie. It was essentially every thing I wished for in expanding the Matrix universe and setting up a denouement that would satisfy. What I hoped for in M3 was something like all the Humans realizing that they needed the machines and forming a pact with them of some kind. Or something. Not the horrendous vomit that was M3.

BTW, I *am* suffering from a nasty flu. That might explain the fever. But I liked T3 before my recent illness.


Definitely brain fever. Thankfully, there’s an effective treatment.

It involves some discomfort and a little singeing, but it works.


I disagree with the Indiana Jones meter. The third may not have been as good as the first, but it was far better than the second.


The first Alien film is still the best. 3 and 4 are crapola.

Horace Dunn

I do think that Candice is a thoroughly sensible woman.

Re: Indiana Jones 3. I couldn't agree that it was better than the second. It was pretty good but marred by the presence of Sean Connery trying to play a lovable eccentric but only succeeding in making normally peacable men like me want to punch him on the nose. Also, the bit at the end with the Grail Knight was too earnest in tone for my taste.


Though it does have a memorable scene with a rotating fireplace, which swings our tied-up heroes between a room full of Nazis and a room full of fire.

“Our situation has not improved.”


"T3 seemed like a solid movie."

Come on!

Did you like the whinny man hero?

When you watch a action movie you need to actually feel the character is worth rooting for. You want Sarah Connor to succeed. You want John to get a life.


Clearly, what we need is a film in which Linda Hamilton and Sigourney Weaver are equipped with flamethrowers and sweaty vests and pitted against an army of robotic, salivating xenomorphs. Impossible odds versus gritty determination. It’d be a conceptual nightmare, of course, but it would get bums on seats.

Matt M

I liked the ending of T3, but can't remember much of what went before that. If the almost total annihilation of humanity is the best bit of a film, something's probably wrong somewhere.


I saw T3 and can't remember anything about it. That's always a good sign.


Sigh. I see how it is.

I'll make one more effort:

T3 continues the series' insistence on plausible explanations and logical consistency given their ground rules. That's one reason to like T3.

As for John Connor being a whiny man-hero, he sure beats the pubescent pipsqueek from T2. His bride-to-be is the real hero of the movie, as the Terminator tells us. Connor is along for the ride. He's severely messed-up, as anyone should be given the crazy shit he's been through. In his mind, he's got to live off the grid, never being allowed a normal life on the threat that some robot from the future will come to kill him. Oh, and he's got the whole "savior of mankind" thing to shoulder as well. I think he does fine.

I think T3 is a thinking-man's action movie. I'd be happy if all the action sequences were replaced with title cards saying "Action Scene Goes Here." They were workman-like, not spectacular. But then again, I can't think of many movies lately that have titillated with superb action sequences.

I love the ending of T3. I love John Connor's reluctant steps into his role as leader of humanity's fight against the machines. I love the homage to 60's era bunkers. The ending is what redeems the film from being mediocre. As such, if you don't dig the way it ends, you don't dig the movie.

It's not up to the standard of T2, but few movies are. I'd say T3 is a 6 or 7, while T2 is a 10. T1 is also a 6 or 7, but only in hindsight. At the time I first saw it it was a 9. Early 80's films don't age well.


The Godfather's meter is not full. Please correct.


Someone fetch a damp cloth. We need to cool Candice’s brain. Stat.


One obvious error is that the Star Wars films are 3,4, and 5 not 1, 2, and 3. Anyone? No? Well it was worth a try.

Alien and Aliens should both have 100%. I agree with the Star Wars ratings (RotJ isn't as bad as people remember). Mad Max 3 is in no way better than Mad Max 1 (I suspect the designer of the graphs is American). And the Matrix 2 & 3 ratings seem a bit generous...

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