Man accused of having sex with a Shetland pony was found “smelling strongly of horses.”
Police say Alan Barnfield was “sweating profusely” and had several cans of Lynx in his bag on the night he was seen leading two ponies into a dark wooded area.
That is all. Carry on.
Barnfield was “sweating profusely” and had several cans of Lynx in his bag
You don't see that kind of thing in the adverts.
Posted by: svh | January 27, 2015 at 11:29
You don’t see that kind of thing in the adverts.
I suspect the market is a little too niche. And evidently the product is insufficient for that particular task.
Posted by: David | January 27, 2015 at 11:33
Is it me or has the Telegraph used a photo of a very happy pony?
Posted by: Sam | January 27, 2015 at 11:38
Is it me or has the Telegraph used a photo of a very happy pony?
Glamour shot!
Posted by: svh | January 27, 2015 at 11:39
I saw an article recently indicating that the Scottish Wildlife Trust is campaigning for the reintroduction of Lynx to Scotland.
Now we know why.
Posted by: Kevin B | January 27, 2015 at 12:53
Is it me or has the Telegraph used a photo of a very happy pony?
Glamour shot!
Ponies should be recognised for their achievements, not their looks. Photographs like that just encourage rape culture. I literally can't breathe right now. Please make it stop. #No2Page3Ponies
Posted by: DH | January 27, 2015 at 13:18
That is all. Carry on.
Well, that's something I really wanted to read with my morning coffee. Thank you, David.
Posted by: R. Sherman | January 27, 2015 at 13:29
#No2Page3Ponies
Oh dear. I fear we’re teetering on the brink of some terrible precipice. When will I learn?
Posted by: David | January 27, 2015 at 14:13
Oh dear. Whatever punishment the court gives, it won't be anything on the "giddy-up!" Or "Ride 'em, cowboy" shouts he'll get wherever he goes from now on.
Poor bugger.
Posted by: Dr Cromarty | January 27, 2015 at 14:16
had several cans of Lynx in his bag... and two bottles of Lucozade.
Lucozade "helps maintain performance during prolonged endurance exercise."
http://www.lucozadesport.com/products/
Posted by: Jacob | January 27, 2015 at 14:21
I see the Telegraph has now removed the oddly glamorous pony photo and replaced it with a burly chap with piercings.
Posted by: David | January 27, 2015 at 14:27
I see the Telegraph has now removed the oddly glamorous pony photo and replaced it with a burly chap with piercings.
A clear victory for the #No2Page3Ponies campaign. Now what can I have banned next?
Posted by: DH | January 27, 2015 at 14:52
"Public warned against dining out on Belfast fish spill."
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-northern-ireland-30997289
Posted by: Joan | January 27, 2015 at 15:24
I see he's a Yorkshireman, so when asked by the Magistrate whether he had sex with a pony, he'll reply: "Neigh".
I'm here all week.
Posted by: Jonathan | January 27, 2015 at 16:09
@Sam: why haven't they blurred the features? How dare they identify a sexual assault victim!
Posted by: JuliaM | January 27, 2015 at 17:50
David: '...and replaced it with a burly chap with piercings.'
A bit surprised he doesn't have a pony tail... ;)
Posted by: JuliaM | January 27, 2015 at 17:57
Can I un-read that and continue with dinner please?
Posted by: Henry | January 27, 2015 at 18:28
Was he grooming them?
Posted by: Ray | January 28, 2015 at 03:50
Mamma mia!
Some people really need to have certain nerves snipped. They might appreciate the quite.
Posted by: dicentra | January 28, 2015 at 17:45
Pass the sick bag, David!
Posted by: Theophrastus | January 28, 2015 at 19:19
Yes, does bring interesting meanings to the classic concepts of Can I have a pony? and A horse of a different color . . .
Also brings whole new meanings to the traditional advice that anytime that you fall off of {situation} the best response is to climb back on as soon as possible . . . !
Posted by: Hal | January 28, 2015 at 20:44
Still prefer him to Kayla Wheeler.
Posted by: Quint&Jessel, Sea of Azof, Bly, UK | January 29, 2015 at 11:00
"Is it me or has the Telegraph used a photo of a very happy pony?"
It's the Telegraphs version of the Mirrors's page three.
Posted by: Greg Allan | January 29, 2015 at 12:40
This is off topic, but yet another expedition into the world of pomo lunacy:
Of all the sacred cows allowed to roam unimpeded in our culture, few are as revered as literacy. Its benefits have been so incontestable that in the five millennia since the advent of the written word numerous poets and writers have extolled its virtues. Few paused to consider its costs...One pernicious effect of literacy has gone largely unnoticed: writing subliminally fosters a patriarchal outlook.
Read the rest, as the kids say.
Posted by: Farnsworth M Muldoon | January 29, 2015 at 13:39
The spam filter is being touchy again. If anyone has trouble with comments not appearing, email me and I’ll jab a stick in there and jiggle it about.
Posted by: David | January 29, 2015 at 13:59
You Beastiophobes should be ashamed.
Posted by: AC1 | January 29, 2015 at 15:21
Off topic (apologies)
Have recently got back in touch with family member after many years. Apparently, they "admire" and are "inspired by"
Noam Chomsky and Glenn Greenwald. Etc.
I think I would prefer it if they admired Mr Barnfield.
Help.
Posted by: RY | January 29, 2015 at 19:22
http://www.standard.co.uk/news/uk/factory-worker-cleared-of-having-sex-with-shetland-pony-is-jailed-for-outraging-public-decency-10014913.html
Posted by: AC1 | January 31, 2015 at 20:36
When asked if he were unwell, he replied, "Well, I am feeling a little horse."
Posted by: BlogDog | February 02, 2015 at 23:44