Michael J Totten relays the splendour of a notable megalomaniac:
Gurbanguly Mälikgulyýewiç Berdimuhamedov just erected a 69-foot statue of himself in the centre of Ashgabat, the capital [of Turkmenistan]. He’s up there on a golden horse atop an enormous slab of marble that looks like an iceberg. He’s compensating. Two years ago he fell off a horse at an official race. The only reason we even know this is because a brave person in the audience captured it on amateur video and uploaded it to the internet. All the other riders rode past him as he lay flat on his back in the dirt, but he was declared the winner regardless and awarded an 11 million dollar prize for his “performance.” This clown follows President Saparmurat Niyazov, who died in 2006 of heart failure. He renamed months of the year after himself and his family. He built a 60-foot statue of himself that slowly rotated so that his face was always in sunlight.
The first in a possible series.
But really, Berdimuhamedov’s statue. You should see the thing.
Well, it makes the Edstone look modest...
Posted by: Theophrastus | June 09, 2015 at 08:03
I Fear it’s a Little Camp
I don't think anyone's going to tell him though.
Posted by: Sam | June 09, 2015 at 08:07
Though I do like the fact he appears to be wearing a cape. Made of gold, obviously. While riding a golden horse. Atop an iceberg made of marble.
Posted by: David | June 09, 2015 at 08:11
I want one
Posted by: bilbaoboy | June 09, 2015 at 08:32
I keep expecting a Brian May guitar solo. Anyway, the twitterati will be along soon to make him check his privilege, yeah?
Posted by: NielsR | June 09, 2015 at 09:26
Someone for George Galloway to spend Christmas with.
If they have Christmas.
Posted by: Horace Dunn | June 09, 2015 at 09:38
"D'ye get the feeling the man's compensating for something?"
Posted by: mojo | June 09, 2015 at 20:10
The inspiration for the statue came in the race just before Gurbanguly fell to the ground. Two young maidens were overheard saying "look at the big dick on the horse'. Gurbanguly mistakenly thought he was riding a stallion.
Posted by: Flynpigranch | June 09, 2015 at 21:22
Is that... is that an afro?
Posted by: Stevedave | June 09, 2015 at 21:25
But really, Berdimuhamedov’s statue. You should see the thing.
Judging from the picture from the article, one can tell that Berdimuhamedov is truly Number One---or mebbe Number Two---given that just that picture alone appears to show not just one but three Rovers . . .
Posted by: Hal | June 09, 2015 at 23:03
Give the poor guy a break. His first name is Gurbanguly, and he lives in a place called Ashgabat. Even J K Rowling couldn't make up names like that. Surely he deserves some sort of compensation for such misfortune. And he seems from that picture to have the ability to make solid marble spheres hang in the air, absolutely unsupported by anthing.
Posted by: ACTOldFart | June 10, 2015 at 00:31
Hal,
...given that just that picture alone appears to show not just one but three Rovers . . .
Ah! So that's what those are. It's all starting to make sense now...
Posted by: Spiny Norman | June 10, 2015 at 02:07
Macias Nguema's my go-to for batshit insane dictators
Christmas, 1975, Equatorial Guinea. After having everyone who wore glasses shot (because he feared they were smarter than him) but before declaring the national motto to be "There is no other God than Macias Nguema", the President-For-Life lined up his political opponents on the field at the national soccer stadium and had soldiers in Santa Claus outfits execute them as loudspeakers blasted Mary Hopkins' Those Were The Days.
Other accomplishments-
banning the word "intellectual"
destroying boats and mining the only road out of the country so people couldn't leave
shooting the president of the national bank and storing all the money in the treasury to rot under the floor of the family hut
banning fishing
getting Equatorial Guinea called "The Dachau of Africa" due to 100,000 people dying during his reign, out of a total of 300,000
His nephew shot him in 1979 and runs the country still. A new hope for the citizens of Equatorial Guinea? Nope, he too declared himself God back in the early 2000s and is apparently fond of being "hands-on" with torturing journalists and political opponents.
Posted by: Steve | June 10, 2015 at 03:45
One of the best features of Tropico 4 (where you play as a tinpot dictator) is that you could build a golden statue of yourself, and optionally upgrade it to always face the sun.
Posted by: Simon | June 10, 2015 at 04:18
The inside of his skull must look like a Mousetrap Ride from the 1970s.
Posted by: Quint&Jessel, Sea of Azof, Bly, UK | June 10, 2015 at 06:44
@ Steve.
Macias Nguema and Equatorial Guinea are apparently the models for Jean Kimba and Zangaro in 'The Dogs of War'.
Posted by: sackcloth and ashes | June 10, 2015 at 14:38
Macias Nguema and Equatorial Guinea are apparently the models for Jean Kimba and Zangaro in 'The Dogs of War'.
It's been ages since I read that one, but the resemblance came to mind for me as well.
Posted by: Hal | June 10, 2015 at 15:58
"Hi-yo, Mxyzptlk, away!"
Posted by: mojo | June 11, 2015 at 06:12
Why Mojo, perfectly formatted, that, even . . . .
Posted by: Hal | June 11, 2015 at 06:41
Wonderful.
A classic example of 1950's Soviet Camp updated just a little bit.
Stalin would have loved it - as long as HE was the man on the horse, of course.
But what are the two large (?) apparently-unsupported white spheres to the left of centre?
Posted by: Andrew Duffin | June 12, 2015 at 13:11
But what are the two large (?) apparently-unsupported white spheres to the left of centre?
We think he's trying to restage The Prisoner . . .
Posted by: Hal | June 12, 2015 at 15:47
'After having everyone who wore glasses shot (because he feared they were smarter than him) but before declaring the national motto to be "There is no other God than Macias Nguema", the President-For-Life lined up his political opponents on the field at the national soccer stadium and had soldiers in Santa Claus outfits execute them as loudspeakers blasted Mary Hopkins' 'Those Were The Days''.
Talking of Mary Hopkins ...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1wgUo5knqcA
Posted by: sackcloth and ashes | June 12, 2015 at 18:22