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June 15, 2016

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Sam

"Sloppy Joe's"

R. Sherman

Crop dusting is all in good fun until someone gets hurt.

SumDumGuy

God bless Florida.

WTP

Once upon a time, women were not allowed in some saloons in the old American west. Never considered farting being one of the factors. Thought it was because it led to fights...ohhhh....

sk60

#DriveBy

rjmadden

Relieved to hear the dislocated shoulder was only an *indirect* result of the fart.

David

The comedy sketch pretty much writes itself.

Spiny Norman

Sam,

As I understand it, when he lived in Key West, Sloppy Joe's was Earnest Hemingway's favorite hangout.

I'm not sure which is more facepalm-worthy, the fart-induced bar fight, or the slap fights in the Miami Herald's reader comments.

R. Sherman

BTW, what are the odds that at some time during the altercation, the following aphorism was deployed:

"He who smelt it, dealt it."

WTP

"He who smelt it, dealt it."

Mom used to say, "Every fox smells its own hole." Damn, I miss her.

R. Sherman

Had this stuff been served, I doubt there would have been fisticuffs.

WTP

...this stuff...

Funny. But

This test was originally published on 1st of April (April Fool's Day). ;-)

Hedgehog

I blame the National Flatulence Association.

We need sensible fart control legislation.

Thomas Fuller

... "his girlfriend Sandra Stoner ..."

Nuff sed.

David

Somewhat related, from an archived Friday Ephemera: “Man pulls gun after neighbour’s aggressive flatulence.

poo

"The first rule of Fart Club is you don't talk about Fart Club!"

"The second rule of Fart Club is you don't talk about Fart Club!"

R. Sherman

David, this requires your special touch, I think.

jones

"David, this requires your special touch, I think."

For goodness sake.....

Now if I may blow my own trumpet briefly I'm not in any way lacking in the smarts department and I have read the article and watched the vid but I just cannot make any sense of what's going on?

Just can't...

What is trying to be said here?

jones

I think the police officer at 3 minutes is having similar difficulties too.

R. Sherman

What is trying to be said here?

As best as I can determine, it appears the Black Lives Matter people are upset that LGBTQ people are not more receptive to racial issues . . . in the middle of a vigil for the victims of Orlando orchestrated by the LGBTQ community. Evidently, the latter has too many people of pallor.

Southpaw

If the offending odor came from my Cocker Spaniel, he'd have a case

jones

Thanks Sherman,

Umm, OK... Still not sure of the dynamics but thank you again.

I find myself wondering what would happen to an individual who identified as a mixed-race, transgender bi-sexual?

A niche to be sure.

J.M. Heinrichs

https://www.amazon.ca/Fart-Proudly-Writings-Benjamin-Franklin/dp/1583940790/ref=sr_1_1

Cheers

dicentra

in the middle of a vigil for the victims of Orlando orchestrated by the LGBTQ community.

The massacre happened on Latino Night, for the sake of Pete. Latinos span the entire complexion range.

R. Sherman

The massacre happened on Latino Night, for the sake of Pete. Latinos span the entire complexion range.

Evidently, someone was complaining about insufficient differentiation among the hues, to wit: "“I’m tired of the black and white dichotomy we hear when we talk about race,” Melecio said. “We never take the time to talk about the shades [of skin] in between – like mine.”

What that has to do with anything is not clear to me.

Farnsworth M. Muldoon

What that has to do with anything is not clear to me.

Privilege is apportioned according to one's hue, value, and chroma as defined by the Munsell system. Virtually anyone's tone can be found on the chart save, perhaps, for someone suffering from carbon monoxide poisoning or argyria. You will notice the racism built into the chart wherein Persons of Pallor would be said to have color (or lack thereof) of high value, whereas Persons of Color (but not Colored People, except at the NAACP)would be said to have color of low value.

It is rayciss, all the way down.

R. Sherman

@Farnsworth

I'm aware of some of the bickering within certain communities regarding shades of skin color. My confusion involved figuring out why that topic was relevant at vigil for the victims of a terrorist shooting.

Incidentally, I find it odd that it seems that the victims only have worth because they are members of designated victim group. I personally am angry because they were/are Americans and didn't delve further into their demographics. I guess that makes me some sort of bigot.

Gunke

After the smoking ban came into place in Irish pubs in 2004 and the decades old fog of smoke cleared, the smell of Guinness fart became very apparent.

BackwardsBoy

Having played there with my band, I can report that Sloppy Joe's is an open-air bar.
That must've been quite the zephyr...

David

I can report that Sloppy Joe’s is an open-air bar. That must’ve been quite the zephyr...

Ah, the value of local knowledge. Sadly, the report doesn’t give much detail regarding the flatulence that led to police involvement, dislocated shoulders and visits to the hospital. It doesn’t say whether the issue was sound, odour or both, or whether the scuffle was prompted by unwelcome proximity, a barrage of repeated affronts or just one act of scandalous abandon.

David

David, this requires your special touch, I think.

Sorry, only just spotted this. But I mumbled something briefly in the comments over here.

redlonghorn

Re: the UM BLM girl, this type of behavior is sadly typical of the Missouri BLM movement. After the Paris terror attacks last year, they actually complained that the attacks were drawing attention away from themselves. See here -

http://www.breitbart.com/national-security/2015/11/14/mizzou-campus-activists-and-black-lives-matter-complain-about-paris-stealing-the-spotlight/

These people are just narcissists. Everything, all the time, has to be about them.

Spiny Norman

...or just one act of scandalous abandon.

I was thinking that perhaps it was part of an ongoing disagreement and the fartee had won the "debate", so to speak, and the farter decided to get in one final retort.

SumDumGuy

. . . in the middle of a vigil for the victims of Orlando orchestrated by the LGBTQ community. Evidently, the latter has too many people of pallor.

So it's the fault of white people that there aren't more black homosexuals?

David

Thanks to a reader who wishes to remain anonymous, I’ve just been made aware of the term “fart prostitute.

MC

“We never take the time to talk about the shades [of skin] in between – like mine.”

Yeah, so 50 dead blah blah... But what about meeeeeeeeeee!?

Fuel Filter

There's a great scene in HBO's "Deadwood" where Al Swearengen smells someone who "cut the cheese" in his office.

He absolutely loses it and yells (something to the effect) "The next one who doesn't use the balcony to fart is going straight down on his face into the muck of the thoroughfare!!"

That's how they did it in post-Civil War North Dakota Territory.

Hilarious!

Wonderful series, BTW. Created by David Milch. Look it up on IMDB. Much better than "Rome", and that's a mouthful.

David

Much better than “Rome”, and that's a mouthful.

Rome was excellent. I based my life on Atia’s teachings.

R. Sherman

. . . I’ve just been made aware of the term “fart prostitute.”

*Casually strolls to the bookshelf and takes down The Holy Bible, King James (1611) and skips to The Revelation of St. John to determine what the hold-up is.*

David

I believe the technical term is eproctophilia.

jabrwok

And now for something...completely different!

fnord

Evidently, someone was complaining about insufficient differentiation among the hues, to wit: "“I’m tired of the black and white dichotomy we hear when we talk about race,” Melecio said. “We never take the time to talk about the shades [of skin] in between – like mine.”
What that has to do with anything is not clear to me.

-------------
The key word. The only important word in that sentence is 'mine'.

David Gillies

The Orlando jihadist was a Pashtun. They are white, for God's sake. Certainly whiter than many of the people he killed.

It's amazing how few of these grievance-mongering pustules have the sort of seven second delay normal people do. The one that, when you're at a vigil for a bunch of people who've just been slaughtered by a terrorist, allows you to envisage the idea of cantering around on your hobby horse and think, "no, that would make me look a complete tit."

Kevin  Riches

This is daily tabloid stuff surely? Does it warrant an inclusion? Just wondered..

David

Does it warrant an inclusion?

This place has a long tradition of items involving exploding toilets and fart-adjacent comedy. It helps offset any delusions of grandeur.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

And now for something...completely different!

Speaking of Herr Fraulein Kuntzman featured in your link, he she is at it again, Alligator kills boy at Disney World — and Man kills right back!

Did something just go wrong? Well, kill all the animals!

That remains the standard stupid human reaction whenever our control of nature goes awry...So, again: We stole an animal from his natural habitat, put him on display for our pleasure, failed to secure the perimeter, and then killed the animal for doing pretty much what we paid the zoo admission fee to see him do.

Yeah, I am reasonably sure Disney didn't stock the "artificial" lake with alligators.

In 2010, again in Brooklyn (which I had no idea was such an animal graveyard!), hundreds of Canada geese were preemptively slaughtered under cover of darkness in the name of airplane safety. At a subsequent vigil, one animal lover pointed out the irony of killing an animal designed by nature to fly simply because it gets in the way of an animal that cannot fly.

Geese, people, meh, same-same, let us all join the candlelight vigil for some Canada geese or maybe some other equally invasive species.

And if we want to vacation in Florida, let's not build our hotel on a fake lake in Alligator Alley.

As was seen in his fictional account of being mauled by an AR-15 we know Ms. Kuntzman is not overly concerned with facts, but, though alligators can be found around Florida, Alligator Alley, AKA I-75, is about 150 miles south of Orlando.

We’re better than this, people. If you love nature, you have to love it when it does something natural.

The poor alligator was turning its life around, wanted to be a rapper, the child deserved to be eaten. I wonder if Ms. Kuntzman lets the rats and cockroaches run rampant in his NY apartment as that is what they naturally do. Pardon me while I go pet the rabid dog that just bit me.

wtp

It's amazing how few of these grievance-mongering pustules have the sort of seven second delay normal people do. The one that, when you're at a vigil for a bunch of people who've just been slaughtered by a terrorist, allows you to envisage the idea of cantering around on your hobby horse and think, "no, that would make me look a complete tit."

Curious...it is generally known that we GOP House speaker Paul Ryan called for a moment of silence for the Orlando victims, the Dems shouted him down and walked out, right? When I mentioned this at work I was accused of the horrible sin of having watched Faux News.

Hal

When I mentioned this at work I was accused of the horrible sin of having watched Faux News.

Prolly 'cause even Faux states that he wasn't shouted down . . .

Looking at several different articles, the uniform agreement is that there was indeed a moment of silence . . . . and then after the quite silent moment of silence, that's when the screaming started . . .

redlonghorn

Hal, I suggest you read these things before you link to them. I clicked the article you linked to - beyond including the headline "Democrats Disrupt Moment of Silence", it clearly states that a Dem Representative, Jim Clyburn of South Carolina, interrupted the moment of silence after only 16 seconds in order to scream about gun control. I highly doubt the moment of silence was intended to last exactly sixteen seconds. You disproved your own argument with your link. That's impressive, in a sad way.

Hal

Hal, I suggest you read these things before you link to them. I clicked the article you linked to - beyond including the headline "Democrats Disrupt Moment of Silence", it clearly states that a Dem Representative, Jim Clyburn of South Carolina, interrupted the moment of silence . . .

Weeelll, first off, there isn't a, i.e., one single, link, but rather there are several links up there. For your benefit and opportunity to read any or all for the first time ever, there is;

WATCH: Following Moment Of Silence, Democrats Shout Down Speaker Ryan

Paul Ryan held a moment of silence. Then some House Democrats held a protest.

Democrats Derail Paul Ryan's Moment Of Silence For Orlando Shooting

House erupts into shouting after moment of silence for Orlando

Democrats heckle Ryan on House floor day after Orlando nightclub massacre ---This latter being Faux news, this may be the article that wtp cited, mebbe . . .

And then there is also the general Google news feed of all such articles to have a look at.

You may have possibly noticed by this point that absolutely none of those headlines read "Democrats Disrupt Moment of Silence". I just tried doing a search for the alleged headline you cite, and Google returns nothing.---Specifically;

No results found for "Democrats Disrupt Moment of Silence".
Results for Democrats Disrupt Moment of Silence (without quotes):

Selecting from one of actual headlines above, the Washington Post article headlined Paul Ryan held a moment of silence. Then some House Democrats held a protest. actually states;

. . . House Speaker Paul Ryan (R-Wis.) asked his fellow lawmakers on both sides of the aisle to participate once again in a ritual that — like the mass shootings that inspire them — feels all too familiar in America.

“The chair asks that the House now observe a moment of silence in memory of the victims of the terrorist attack in Orlando,” Ryan said.

As he crossed his chest and bowed his head, most of the chamber followed suit.

But a handful of Democrats walked out.

What followed the silence was an eruption of protest from Democratic representatives . . . .

So, for your benefit:
First, there was Ryan calling for a moment of silence.

Second, there was the actual moment of silence.---again for your benefit, silence in this case indicates that there was a general absence of major sound, as the House did indeed follow along with Ryan's direction.

Third, following the moment of silence---that does mean after the moment of silence---following the moment of silence, assorted Democrats then began to speak.

So at this point, what you can certainly do is to actually read any number of articles for the first time, to better learn what actually really goes on past some handy computer screen, where if you should do that, you hopefully won't need me or anyone else to spell out for you how things actually are.

WTP

No, Hal. I got my info from that right-wing source, The Washington Post. Can't find the exact article right now, however there is this from the horse's mouth:


Rep. Jim Himes: Why I walked out of the House’s moment of silence for Orlando
...
Instead of staying in the House chamber Tuesday night, I walked outof the moment of silence, joined by some of my colleagues. Other Democrats who remained in the chamber tried to get Speaker Paul D. Ryan (R-Wis.) to act on gun control legislation. To no avail.
...

https://www.washingtonpost.com/posteverything/wp/2016/06/14/why-i-walked-out-of-the-houses-moment-of-silence-for-orlando/

Note the bold.

WTP

More from WaPo:


House Speaker Paul D. Ryan (R-Wis.) happened to be the man on-camera when the traditionally bipartisan moment became unglued. Following Sunday's attack that killed 49 people at a gay nightclub in Orlando, Ryan asked for a moment of silence Monday night as he gaveled the House to order. Ryan then crossed his chest and bowed his head.

But as the chamber fell quiet, a handful of Democrats walked out. And when Ryan lifted his head a moment later, there was an eruption of protest from Democrats critical of Republicans' refusal to again vote on gun control legislation in the wake of a mass shooting

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-fix/wp/2016/06/19/why-the-moment-of-silence-has-suddenly-become-very-political/

WTP

Now I will admit the order I state above, to wit "the Dems shouted him down and walked out", which was my recollection of how the original article stated such. Either way, had the opposite happened and GOP behaved in that manner, there is no doubt in my mind that the story would be out there, repeated quite loudly with much indifference to this detail.

Hal

Now I will admit the order I state above, to wit "the Dems shouted him down and walked out", which was my recollection of how the original article stated such.

Bingo---Yes, all the very many stories discussing the occurrence do rather emphatically note that the moment of silence occurred, do note that during the moment, some did walk out---Silently---and then the continuing observation is that the screaming then started after the moment of silence . . .

Either way, had the opposite happened and GOP behaved in that manner, there is no doubt in my mind that the story would be out there, repeated quite loudly with much indifference to this detail.

Weeeellll . . . of this story, this story Is very emphatically out there, that's how I got all the different sources that are all telling the same sequence of events . . . In fact, at this moment, Google is giving me fifteen pages of results for that one search, so the story did get quite thoroughly noted and disseminated . . .

Hence, Ehn, my reaction of Um . . . waitaminnit, sumpin doesn't match here . . . .

Hal

When I mentioned this at work I was accused of the horrible sin of having watched Faux News.

Oh, right, and . . . I looked at the statement and practiced Um, Waitaminnit, lemme look that up.

Of what you're apparently describing, that appears to have rather nothing at all to do with what did or did not occur in the House and instead is a matter of coworkers doing the idiocy of faith based ideology over reality. Whether right wing liberal or left wing liberal, citing faith over reason ain't gonna achieve anything aside from showing the faithful to be devoid of facts and therefore, well, being the faithful . . .

Me, I'm not right wing or left wing, I'm conservative. Therefore I have the ongoing advantage of zero ideology . . . .

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