Tidings (11)

Carol of the Bells, performed by Acoustic Trench. Assisted by Maple the dog.

As is the custom here, posting will be intermittent over the holidays and readers are advised to subscribe to the blog feed, which will alert you to anything new as and when it materialises. Thanks for around 1.5 million visits this year and thousands of comments, many of which prompted discussions that are much more interesting than the actual posts. Which is pretty much the idea. And particular thanks to all those who’ve made PayPal donations to keep this rickety barge above water. Curious newcomers and those with nothing better to do are welcome to rummage through the reheated series in search of entertainment.

To you and yours, a very good one. 

Comments

[Pogonip]

Merry Christmas, everybody!

[Liz]

Thanks for some great reads, David. Have a wonderful Christmas. :-)

[David]

Some niche amusement. Melvyn Bragg’s no-nonsense programme openings.

Via Damian.

[David]

Also via Damian, I don’t think that’s an owl.

[[+]]

Hope you (and the heathens here) have a great Christmas and New Year.

Thanks for another year of grim/funny blogging. I've dropped something in your stocking.

[David]

another year of grim/funny blogging

I should put that in the brochure.

I’ve dropped something in your stocking.

May your upholstery never discolour in places that are hard to conceal with carefully positioned cushions.

[gunker]

Merry Christmas, tipjar hit

[David]

May your toaster bottom remain free of combustible crumbs.

[David]

Via dicentra, this:

Oh, come on.

[mike fowle]

Thanks throughout the year for the fragments which I have shored against my ruins. Have a great Christmas and New Year.

[Jonathan]

Cheers Everyone!

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

As we head into this very white, colonial, cis-heteropatrirchal holiday that celebrates elven slave-labor and oppresses minorities and non-Xtian religions with violent images of bows and wrapped gifts, decorated trees, &c., the kind folks over at SDA bring us all a timely reminder that we all must check our privilege.

Anyone who actually prepares for, and enjoys, this Pagan celebration culturally appropriated by the Xtians is obviously a fascist. Oh, yes, also rayciss, of course.

[David]

a timely reminder that we all must check our privilege.

Plus fifty… and another fifty… minus 150… carry the four…

I’m going to need a pen and paper.

[Sam Duncan]

“check our privilege.”

“If you can't add, -30”

What if you can't read? Either way, I'm waiting until “Saterday night” to knock 15 off my score. Whenever that is.

Merry Chrissmess, everyone!

[WTP]

As the ship I was awaiting has finally come in, just sent a jingle up your leg, David. As the kids say, Ya feel me?

[David]

just sent a jingle up your leg, David.

Bless you, sir. May your visit to the supermarket never be blemished by accidentally picking up slimline tonic water.

[WTP]

Also, Santa Claus boot camp...I am sticky, I’m in pain...

https://www.facebook.com/weaponcrates/videos/2004205406460650/

[Captain Nemo]

To you and yours, a very good one.

As is my custom, thank you and likewise, David. Many happy returns to you and the Other Half.

[Elephants Gerald]

As always - my warmest regards to all Davids readers and their families.

I hope everyone is in the pink and so forth.

Now stop arguing with the internet and finish your Christmas shopping.

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

I hope everyone is in the pink and so forth.

Pink ? Really ? I hope you know you just erased the bodies and lived experiences of POCs with that privileged remark.

[David]

Now stop arguing with the internet

[ Summons henchlesbians. Drunken interloper is dragged into cellar. Shouts and crashing can be heard. ]

[Fruitbat44]

Merry Christmas to one and all! Peace on Earth and good will.

[Spiny Norman]

Merry Christmas to David and Chris, and all the strange and wonderful people who post here and make this page my "morning paper".

In other festive merry-making news, the Gävle Goat is still standing, proud and unburnt.

[pst314]

the Gävle Goat

https://youtu.be/tS_JBDRk8o0?t=221

[R. Sherman]

Merry Christmas and a Blessed 2018 to you and yours, David and to all.

[pst314]

Summons henchlesbians.

(anquished voice) But, but, somebody on the internet is wrong!

--But never our esteemed host. :-)

[R. Sherman]

Merry Christmas and a Blessed 2018 to you and yours, David and to all!

[R. Sherman]

Why my comment posted thrice is not clear to me. I swear I'm not into the grog yet.

[R. Sherman]

Comments are running amok. I swear, I'm not into the grog yet.

[David]

But never our esteemed host. :-)

And anything you hear to the contrary, especially from The Other Half, is a filthy lie.

[Spiny Norman]

pst314

Look, if we built this large wooden badger...

[Joan]

Merry Christmas to our host and the heathen rabble.

[pst314]

Spiny Norman
How about we build a large wooden budgie?
http://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/tv/monty-pythons-dead-parrot-suspended-from-crane-in-london-in-tribute-to-comedy-quintet-9605312.html

[Rafi]

Merry Christmas all. Enjoy some news bloopers...

http://twistedsifter.com/videos/best-news-bloopers-of-2017/

[Wh00ps]

Merry Christmas to you too David, and likewise all of you in the commentariat. Looking forward to you all making me shout at my telephone throughout 2018...

[JuliaM]

Merry Christmas and here's to 2018!

[Jacob]

Flirting and ice cream -what could go wrong?

http://www.neatorama.com/2017/12/23/The-Flirt/

Have a good one, y'all.

[David]

Flirting and ice cream -what could go wrong?

You can practically hear the bosoms heaving.

[Joan]

You can practically hear the bosoms heaving.

*bosoms heaving*

Suddenly I want some ice cream.

[David]

Suddenly I want some ice cream.

His ice cream seemed to get bigger the more he licked it.

[Ted S., Catskill Mtns., NY, USA]

[ Summons henchlesbians. Drunken interloper is dragged into cellar. Shouts and crashing can be heard. ]

Wouldn't it be easier to feed interlopers the pickled eggs?

[David]

Wouldn’t it be easier to feed interlopers the pickled eggs?

But then there’s all the mopping to consider, and the hazmat team, and the bribing of health and safety inspectors...

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

In keeping with the acoustic Christmas music theme, is now time we get hacked with Russians.

[David]

The festive season:

Via Holborn.

[Spiny Norman]

The festive season.

Okay, that one made me laugh.

[David]

Okay, that one made me laugh.

I’m beginning to wonder if it’s possible that Lynne doesn’t always see eye to eye with Steve’s mother.

[Theophrastus]

Merry Christmas to one and all!

[Ed Snack]

Now, from a place where is almost midday on Christmas Day, merry Christmas to all who post and peruse, and especially to our host for his dedication to the cause- whatever that cause actually is...

[David]

his dedication to the cause- whatever that cause actually is...

You’d think they’d give out medals for this kind of thing.

[Pogonip]

They do. The Golden Egg Jar.

I have a virus for Christmas; sore throat and exhausted. I am disgruntled.

[Spiny Norman]

Pogonip,

Disgruntled, eh? Caught the bah-humbug? A Grinch even?

Sorry to hear that. Eggnog with extra rum may help... here's to your feeling better tomorrow.

[Quint and Jessel]

Merry Christmas, and God bless us, everyone.

[Pogonip]

Thank you, Norman. 😪😷. Cough cough cough hack—

Hey, where’d everybody go?

[David]

sore throat and exhausted. I am disgruntled.

Try one of our cocktails. It’s mostly crushed ice and Night Nurse.

I’ll put it on your tab.

[Farnsworth M. Muldoon]

A cheerful Christmas tune with lyrics, so feel free to sing along !

[Ted S., Catskill Mtns., NY, USA]

And in sentences you can't unread, He reportedly purchased the butt plug in order to help ease an infection.

[pst314]

"in order to help ease an infection"

Riiiight.

[pst314]

"Cheers everyone!"

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saturn_Devouring_His_Son

[Hal]

Postcards from 1968, Somewhere In London.

More Cowbell!!!

Say again???

[Hal]

Oh, yes, and more drumming.

[R. Sherman]

Hollywood Culture Wars: A Report From the Front.

We celebrate Christmas on the 24th so that leaves our Christmas Day free. For many years, we've taken in a movie at the local multiplex to packed houses for matinees and evening showings. So this year, we decided to take in The Last Jedi and I was expecting a similarly packed house.* Instead, we sat with less than 20 other people in a venue that seats 300 for a 4:00 PM show. Further, none of the other theaters were close to full as in the past. When we left, there were maybe a couple of dozen people in the lobby waiting for the early evening offerings. I'm not sure what conclusions to draw, but Hollywood cannot be happy.

*No Spoiler Review: On a scale from Heaven's Gate (Horrific) to "Meh" to Citizen Kane, I'd give it a slightly better than "Meh." The plot was too busy for my tastes; too many plot points seemed forced. YMMV.

[Pogonip]

Mixing dextromethorphan with a prescription medicine I take can cause hallucinations. Good thing David didn’t know that. Can’t remember having a nicer chat with a 12- horned pink flooblehopper.

Can I have some more Night Nurse, please?

[WTP]

I recommend a Night Nurse & Night Train cocktail. We call it Night-Night.

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

I recommend a Night Nurse & Night Train cocktail. We call it Night-Night.

Yes, calling it Nurse Train would have a completely different connotation.

[Hal]

I recommend a Night Nurse & Night Train cocktail. We call it Night-Night.

Yes, calling it Nurse Train would have a completely different connotation.

There is Linux, which is an open source operating system where the original founder oversees what is called the kernel, the main central Stuff that operates the computer. Of all of the surreally ridiculously infinite number of what are called Linux distributions, they consist of the Linux kernel and then whatever assorted additional bits the distribution staff think are important.

There is also FreeBSD, which is an open source operating system and one of the Unix offshoots. Among the differences between FreeBSD and the Linii is that FreeBSD is a monolithic project, where kernel development all the way out to the decorative bits are all worked on by the one overall team of volunteers.

A particular friend of mine has rather preferred Linux, but also keeps a general eye on assorted variations and editions. A number of years back he noted a particular set of possibilities and cheerfully announced, more or less;

Y'know, what could be quite interesting is to take the [something] Linux distribution, and swap in the FreeBSD kernel. We could then announce the creation and distribution of FreeLSD and really piss off the stuffed shirts!!!