Bad Girls

Apparently, this is a thing.

Comments

[Mike]

I draw the line at first degree murder.

#standards

[David]

I’m just shocked that neatly sculpted eyebrows aren’t proof of good character.

#WorldviewInTatters

[hgs]

I scrolled down a little. Generally sad; once, along a time ago, most offences would have been worked out away from the Break or not seen as an offence at all. The tiny insignificance of tiny actions with possibly brutal endings. Now broadcast around the world. I need to 'get a life'.

[Clam]

The Universal Hot Vs Crazy Matrix.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vwbKYcBdVyk

[JuliaM]

All rocking that 'just got out of bed, haven't combed my hair' look.

[David]

“Attempting to carry a gun through airport security.”

[Frank]

criminal mischief (attempted to inscribe the word ‘whore’ into a car but misspelled it as ‘wore’)

Cute despite it all.

[David]

Cute despite it all.

I suspect this thread will tell me something about the kind of people who comment here.

[WTP]

Hey, where did we go
Days when the rains came ?
Down in the hollow
Playing a new game
Laughing and a-running, hey, hey
Skipping and a-jumping
In the misty morning fog with
Our, our hearts a-thumping

[WTP]

attempted to inscribe the word ‘whore’ into a car but misspelled it as ‘wore’

Well, you do understand Blondie had legitimate reasons.

[dw]

.

[David]

On the one hand, robbery, assault, grand theft, general gangsterism… But on the other hand, excellent bone structure.

[bilbaoboy]

Gender equality at last!

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

Cute despite it all.

Yes, however, gentlemen and those of you who identify as such, what do we not stick in crazy ?

[R. Sherman]

Evidently, some jurisdiction has the offense, "knowingly driving..." The addition of a culpable mental state is interesting inasmuch as I cannot imagine driving a motor vehicle while being unaware that I am, in fact, operating a motor vehicle. Query, whether impaired mental states, i.e. alcohol or drug intoxication become a defense to the "knowing" element of the offense? Strange.

In other matters, we now know where they do the casting calls for all those lesbian prison movies.

[Daniel Ream]

Query, whether impaired mental states, i.e. alcohol or drug intoxication become a defense to the "knowing" element of the offense?

It's a kafkatrap. Either they get you on the knowingly or they get you on the DUI.

I admit I had to look up "simple affray".

[WTP]

what do we not stick in crazy

And die virgins? YMMV, of course.

[Jonathan]

Physiognomy is real:

Cute:

- Possession of marijuana and drug paraphernalia

Cute:

- Driving the wrong way on a one way street and DUI

Psycho:

- First Degree Murder.

[David]

I fear I may have opened a can of worms...

[TomJ]

At the risk of being a bleeding heart, are these young ladies suspects or convicts? presumption of innocence seems rather fragile in the land of the perpetrator walk…

[R. Sherman]

Some years back, my profession took me to our state's maximum security women's prison. It was, shall we say, an interesting experience. The inmates were all Class A and B offenders, but the atmosphere was remarkably laid back. I walked around without an escort among the buildings and marveled at how seemingly well-behaved the denizens were. This, despite the fact that the young "lady" I was there to depose had murdered her mother by stabbing her 72 times. Sometimes, life is truly weird.

[David]

Some years back, my profession took me to our state’s maximum security women’s prison.

See, this is why, after ten bloody years, I still poke about in the comments.

[Governor Squid]

Reminds me of the Elder Days, when Iowahawk wrote more than 100 characters at a time. He had a recurring feature entitled Hoosegow Honeys.

Those were simpler times...

[Governor Squid]

At the risk of being a bleeding heart, are these young ladies suspects or convicts?

Let me assure you that I'm judging only their appearance. Because I'm so classy.

[Spiny Norman]

I see Guv'nuh Squid has mentioned the Iowahawk classic "Hoosegow Honeys".

Having once dated a crazy woman (for 7 years), none of these miscreants interest me in the least.

(I'm getting old, I guess.)

[David]

Having once dated a crazy woman (for 7 years),

And having flown her half way around the world to be with us tonight, here she is…

[ Curtains part, applause ensues. ]

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

And die virgins?

Some of had to learn the hard way.

Some years back, my profession took me to our state's maximum security women's prison.

Some years back, my profession took me to my then state's prison for the criminally insane, talk about interesting. Alas, the facility is now closed, so whether the inmates were transferred to the state's maximum security prisons, let loose, or were all elected to the state legislature remains a mystery.

[Jon Powers]

Some of these ladies need to add theft to their list of crimes. They stole my heart....

[David]

They stole my heart....

Someone fetch some ice for Jon’s loins. Or a bulldog clip. Whichever’s nearest.

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

They stole my heart...

Unfortunately, they'll probably turn into.

[Daniel Ream]

marveled at how seemingly well-behaved the denizens were

While there are rare exceptions - women's prisons do have their occasional habitually violent psychopaths - they are exceedingly rare. Most murders committed by women are crimes of passion, habitual violent reoffenders are not something women's prisons generally design for.

[Spiny Norman]

... habitual violent reoffenders are not something women's prisons generally design for.

There's a "reality show" on cable tv here in the USofA called "60 Days In", where they have non-offenders trying to survive in a county jail for, well, 60 days. The camera crews are ostensibly "filming a documentary film on life in lock-up", so as not to blow the non-offenders' cover. There seems to be far more violent brawls in the womens' jail.

The fights in a mens' jail may be more often lethal, but still.

[Hal]

Some of these ladies need to add theft to their list of crimes. They stole my heart....

My heart is in my hand . . . .

[Monty James]

Does anyone have an idea what a "bae" is?

[David]

Does anyone have an idea what a “bae” is?

I believe it means a person’s boyfriend or girlfriend; crush, love, squeeze, etc. Commonly used by proletarian teenagers, for whom the second syllable of baby is just too exhausting.

Not to be confused with bæ, which is apparently a Danish word for excrement.

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

Does anyone have an idea what a "bae" is?

A multinational corporation that makes aircraft, ships, vehicles, and other defense items.

[Governor Squid]

There seems to be far more violent brawls in the womens' jail.

It may simply be that these get better ratings for the show.

[lotocoti]

interfering with a police officer

I guess the interfering didn't end happily.

[SumDumGuy]

It may simply be that these get better ratings for the show.

Very much the case.

In my state, the largest female prison (with the "hardest" population) reports 3.34 inmate on inmate assaults per thousand inmates, which is .14 above average statewide. The rest of the female prisons are considerably lower; with the least violent of them reporting 0 assaults for the past 3 months. The only male prison that can boast anything even close to that is a low custody, program heavy facility in which bad behavior will result in a transfer to a harder facility.

[pst314]

I fear I may have opened a can of worms...

And I was about to complain about the pickled eggs. Never mind...

[Hal]

I fear I may have opened a can of worms...

And I was about to complain about the pickled eggs. Never mind...

Could depend on the worms . . .

[Portlandmermaid]

And not an embarrassed look among them.

[Adam]

mugshots baes ...? Is it supposed to be mugshot babes and they spelled it wrong or am I missing something?

[David]

Bae.

[WTP]

Is it supposed to be mugshot babes and they spelled it wrong or am I missing something?

Nearest I (OK, Google) can translate would be:

Basin of Gravy
Treacle Tart
Ocean Pearl

[jabrwok]

Bae: https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Bae

[Anon]

This needs to be a quiz where you have to match the girl to the crime.