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February 16, 2018

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Sporkatus

The Iran item has unaccountably reminded me of a Taco Bell cross-promotion with the 1998 Godzilla film. The chihuahua mascot saying "Here, leezard leezard."

A pity for the mullahs that both fearless chihuahuas and Taco Bell are Haram. They might have had something.

Darleen

Wine glasses of note.

This item does not ship to the United States.

I have the sadz.

Sporkatus

Hopefully not posted here already, I present the Furby Organ:
https://youtu.be/GYLBjScgb7o

PiperPaul

Flushing decisions

-4° <=== I was kind of expecting to see this guy in the iconography

PiperPaul

Employment equality in the statusful, comfortable, good jobs now!

Ten

Escaping the lab while the humans sleep.

To put it mildly, Boston Dynamics wins the least self-aware company ever award. Fortunately humanity will realize the folly of robotics and pull back from the brink. Just in time.

BlogDog

Having a double bass in the shower is no excuse not to bathe there fella.

MC

The former Chief of Staff of Iran’s armed forces said that Western spies had used lizards which could ‘attract atomic waves’ to spy on the country’s nuclear programme.

The first response to that tweet: "I was in Egypt once where I was told entirely seriously that the shark that had attacked a tourist the day before was sent from Israel." There's no hope...

Flushing decisions

Always good to see someone experiencing the marvellousness that is Japan for the first time.

David

This item does not ship to the United States.

Darleen, try here.

sH2

Pong for the feet.

ISWYDT

sH2

Meet your new neighbours.

The next film should be about how the neighbours had them killed.

David

The next film should be about how the neighbours had them killed.

That would seem to be the next obvious step.

JuliaM

’For the ladies, some Russian gangster glamour.’

Oh, if only Valentine’s Day has fallen on a Friday!

David

Oh, if only Valentine’s Day has fallen on a Friday!

Steady, Julia. I don’t want the place awash with womanly juices.

Nikw211

“The former Chief of Staff of Iran’s armed forces said that Western spies had used lizards which could ‘attract atomic waves’ to spy on the country’s nuclear programme.”

I hate to be a party pooper, but I saw that and immediately assumed it was a translation error. And sure enough, according to Google translate at least, English 'lizard' translates to:

    یلی rounder, parasite, sponge, sponger, drone, lizard

So it seems he was talking about drones, not lizards, which would kind of make more sense.

Of course, none of that makes it any less likely that the former Chief of Staff of Iran’s armed forces is a major loon - he's just perhaps not that kind of loon ...

David

[ Fetches Nik’s coat, hurries him to the door. ]

David

East London in colour.

Rafi

Sargon on Black Panther.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-k0AST2sQRI

Tim Newman

Guy Spends Almost A Year Gluing 42,000 Matches To Make A Giant Sphere, Sets It On Fire: https://www.boredpanda.com/sphere-of-42000-matches-wallacemk/

David

Guy Spends Almost A Year Gluing 42,000 Matches To Make A Giant Sphere, Sets It On Fire

Makes blogging look respectable.

[ Arches eyebrows, admires fingernails. ]

David

Sexy plant.

Via Damian.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Flushing decisions

"Say what do you think of Flushing, Long Island ?"

"Damn fine idea."

So it seems he was talking about drones, not lizards...

Don't bet the riverboat on it, remember the Saudis captured an Israeli spy vulture, and the Egyptians a Mossad spy shark (sans frickin' laser beam).

Clam

Flushing decisions

"Oscillate"? o_O

David

Flushing decisions

What could possibly go wrong?

Tom
Flushing decisions

What could possibly go wrong?

Maybe it's just me, but does anyone else wonder why you'd have a self-destruct system on an ore freighter? I mean, how many oil tankers or bulk carriers have that as an option?

I'd like to have been at that meeting...

Ship Designer: Well, that seems to have covered everything don't you agree?

Peter Weyland: I didn't see a self-destruct system in the proposal anywhere.

SD: I'm sorry? Why would we build a self-destruct system into a mult-trillion dollar space freighter? None of our clients have ever requested anything like that.

PW: (sliding evil master plan under the proposal folder)Yes, well... it's a requirement and a deal breaker.

SD: (shrugging shoulders) Sure, we'll build in a self-destruct system then. (muttering) bloody evil geniuses...

David

Remembering the Food Poisoning Horror Show of last November, I think all toilets should come with a self-destruct. It would save a lot of time.

Sam

"Mother, turn the air freshener back on!"

pst314

Young Romance

How to Tell if Your Dog Worships Satan:

https://twitter.com/PulpLibrarian/status/962422043093463040

pst314

Young Romance
How to Tell if Your Dog Worships Satan:
https://twitter.com/PulpLibrarian/status/962422043093463040

pst314

Sorry about the double posting, David. Something went wrong with my browser.

David

Have a pickled egg. On the house.

TomJ
To put it mildly, Boston Dynamics wins the least self-aware company ever award. Fortunately humanity will realize the folly of robotics and pull back from the brink. Just in time.

Other

TomJ

The blog done et my html! I was attempting to link to https://m.xkcd.com/1955/

Tim Newman

The cost of light has fallen, but people spend roughly the same amount on light as they always did (i.e. they simply buy more light).

Ten

I was attempting to link to https://m.xkcd.com/1955/

Which, despite the inherent gravitas of OCD cartooning, misses a raft of pertinent facts on the subject and their trajectory. At least in a universe where autonomy and self-replication are fairly concrete phenomenon, that is.

I mean, look at how well we designed and then grasped and accorded most of our dominant institutions. As proof of superior trade we still think money grows on trees and that the components of nanny-statism are developed to, and I quote, heal the ill, rescue the trapped, prevent crime, and defend the nation, thus ensuring safety.

AI is therefore inherently and forever Asmovian and here to help us. Just ask it (and not clowns like Dick).

David

Smash and grab. How hard can it be?

Governor Squid

Meet your new neighbours.

They present this as some kind of inspirational story, but to me it seems much more of a cautionary tale. Mommas, don't let your babies grow up to be New Yorkers!

As for the windows on San Francisco, I can't help but think of my wife's response every time somebody says "It takes all kinds!"

"No, we just have all kinds."

David

They present this as some kind of inspirational story, but to me it seems much more of a cautionary tale.

Yes, setting aside the novelty, what struck me was the utter selfishness of it – the apparent disregard for other residents, whose opinions on the subject are – conveniently – all but absent.

R. Sherman

Smash & Grab

In fairness, there was a "smash" followed by a "grab" combined with a "drag." So, they've got that going for them.

SumDumGuy

Yes, setting aside the novelty, what struck me was the utter selfishness of it

"We are trying to change the way you might see an orchestra play." - Whatshisface 1:50 of the video.

So instead of a fancy night out; jammed into 500 sq. feet with a bunch of grubby, smelly hipsters.

His statements would fit right in with the pretentious babble dribbling from the mouths of and of the "artists" you have brought to our attention in the past.

David

“We are trying to change the way you might see an orchestra play.”

Which apparently trumps all other considerations, and consideration itself. Given the novelty setting - an obvious recipe for friction - you’d think the preferences of other residents – the dozens of people who will hear their rehearsal every month, whether they wish to or not – might be explored a little, rather than brushed over as hastily as possible. That it isn’t deemed interesting, a thing one might address, suggests a certain… mindset.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Which apparently trumps all other considerations...

Not the least of which is actual acoustics, real orchestras are arranged they way the are for a reason, and don't have strings, brass, woodwinds, etc., just thrown together at random - I'm sure the bass player in the bathtub can hear the marimba guy in the kitchen and vice versa, not that 60 bodies in 500sq. ft. isn't great sound attenuation or anything. Of course, it looks like these two tyros are just feeding everything into mixing board software where they can fix the cacophony.

In a just world someone would tip off the local ASPCA and save that poor cat, and the landlord evict them for tearing apart the premises.

Darleen

Dean Wormer, call your office.

WTP

Which apparently trumps all other considerations, and consideration itself.

Well to be somewhat fair, it's not like they left the place with a young woman tied to the bed with a baby shark stuffed in her squeezebox (or did they?). They're trying to create legends here.

Hal

Maybe it's just me, but does anyone else wonder why you'd have a self-destruct system on an ore freighter? I mean, how many oil tankers or bulk carriers have that as an option?

Wellll, what does come to mind after a bit is that by the time very large scale ships are heading across sections of the galaxy, one argument can be the the unknown factor.

---It's not as if these ships are only going from this bit of shoreline over to that bit of shoreline that can be seen through binoculars. And, also given those noted levels of reaction, the worst nasties will also be human, and thus have on hand several million tons of mass to drop on some handy friendly planet . . . unless there's a mechanism also on hand to rather distribute the mass, and also whatever the specific nasties on board . . .

R. Sherman

@Darleen

The youngest is in the midst of finalizing his college selection, a selection which is primarily concerned with money. Still, I am the gatekeeper of all of his suitors--he's a National Merit Finalist, so they are legion--and invariably, I go to places like FIRE and Campus Reform to do a search. Suffice it to say, I've eliminated a lot of options that way. As long as I control the checkbook, I control the choices. DePaul was cast into outer darknes a long time ago given its abysmal rating at FIRE.

David

They’re trying to create legends here.

Heh. As someone who over the years has spent plenty of time in recording studios and rehearsal rooms, and who probably annoyed a neighbour or two, it’s one of those things I’m belatedly mindful about. Largely as a result of an incident in the 90s when, after a long, all-night session in the studio, I stumbled home around mid-morning on a Sunday, crawled into bed, and was immediately assailed by the sound of an all-day live music event starting outside the art-house cinema a few yards up the road. Cosmic payback, I suspect.

Pogonip

http://mysteriousuniverse.org/2018/02/pesticide-resistant-mutant-super-rats-taking-over-england/

PiperPaul

Feed those rats some of David's pickled "eggs", that'll fix things.

Sam Martinez

Russian gangster glamour

Where Are They Now: Curly

"The great collapse in slapstick was especially hard on the obese object of abusive humor..."

Governor Squid

Apart from the selfishness and lack of concern for the neighbors, I was thinking "cautionary tale" from the perspective of "these people think cramming themselves into a walk-in closet with 60 other people and their musical instruments is not just a fun way to spend a Saturday night, but also something to brag about and post on YouTube."

I can't imagine the sequence of thoughts that leads to one telling oneself that this is a great idea. It's like voluntarily gorging oneself on our esteemed host's pickled eggs.

Matt

Lizards capable of attracting atomic waves... I know where this leads:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U_UU9LDVQxA

http://mysteriousuniverse.org/2018/02/pesticide-resistant-mutant-super-rats-taking-over-england/

A solution presents itself:

On a different note, I'm surprised this hasn't come up here yet:

http://observer.com/2018/02/new-report-reveals-jeremy-corbyn-was-a-communist-spy-in-1980s/

Pogonip

PiperPaul: 😂

jabrwok

A solution presents itself:

Alas, I perceive no solution:-(.

PiperPaul

RE: Corbyn

Maybe there are so many useful idiots and weaponized morons that the actual spies went/go unnoticed?

Hal

http://mysteriousuniverse.org/2018/02/pesticide-resistant-mutant-super-rats-taking-over-england/

I have yet to see the article that claims that mutant super rats have become resistant to stock variety cats.

Hal

A solution presents itself:

Alas, I perceive no solution:-(.

Actually, Matt's complete statement on the matter is as follows:

A solution presents itself:

img src="http://disq.us/url?url=http%3A%2F%2Fimgur.com%2FPU1JrQL.gif%3ABun4Xj6eGSle9sUdelA6C5Qm06Q&cuid=3669223"

I did finally sort out that what he is trying to say is

Pogonip

A lot of cats won’t take on a rat, with good reason. What you need is a Jack Russell terrorist or some similar dog.

When I was a kid, we had a beagle who de-moled our huge lawn, not typical beagle behavior. Even more atypical, she never ate one, just played with them. She looked perfectly beagl-y.

Hal

Apparently breaking news: Hipsters on the high seas.

Pogonip

AFTER Lent (I shouldn’t be on here right now, but the flesh is weak), I am thinking about starting a book blog. I am sure you will, reasonably, ask why the world needs another female book blogger. Well, the reasons are:

—I read almost everything BUT chick lit. I have close to 1,000 books on my Kindle and not one of them has been, probably never will be, featured on Oprah’s book club.

—I’m old and can thus alert the young to literary treasures from before their time, such as Hal Borland’s “Beyond Your Doorstep.”

Would any of you be interested in a Pogonip book blog?

WTP

K...since we’re talking rats, is anyone else wise to some sort of freak out going on because some YouTube d-bag tasered a DEAD rat? Or am I just blessed with a special kind of radar?

champ

You never know what you'll get...
https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/pilot-forced-make-emergency-landing-12038181

Chester Draws

Most cats won't take on rats. But then most cats are jelly fed city softies.

Others are made of sterner stuff. We adopted a feral kitten. Over the years it turned into a soft house cat.

Who absolutely loved killing rats.

Spiny Norman

Most cats won't take on rats.... Others are made of sterner stuff.

Yep, feral cats most definitely will. When I lived in San Diego, about 20 years ago, I was in the Gaslamp Quarter, the old harbor front (now a tourist spot, like Fisherman's Wharf in San Francisco). There was still a fish market and produce market there then (so roaches were a constant nuisance). One night, walking home from a bar crawl*, I spotted probably the largest rat I'd ever seen, and the only one I'd seen there. A marveled at it for moment, until a cat, barely larger than the rat, pounced on it and made quick work of it, then dragged it off behind the building. I then understood why I never saw any rats (quite unlike when I lived in Las Vegas).

(*I've never been a heavy drinker, so it was "one beer per bar", and I wasn't actually drunk, just a little tipsy.)

Also, I believe San Diego had an "NVR" (Neuter, Vaccinate, Release) program at the time to deal with feral cats, rather than eliminating them - because they were so good at controlling rodents.

Burnsie

After all that Russian gangster glamour, the "From Russia With Love" link at the bottom of the page provided a much-needed palate cleanser.

Just sayin'.

Jonathan

You know that feeling when you're a Witch and you fancy going out on your broomstick? Well, you can't in Swaziland.
When will the hatred end?

Jonathan

Dogs in Ancient History.

via Battle Beagle.

TomJ

Tim Harford covered the light price history in his excellent podcast:
http://open.live.bbc.co.uk/mediaselector/5/redir/version/2.0/mediaset/audio-nondrm-download-low/proto/http/vpid/p04lp7tm.mp3

TomJ

I'm not doing well this thread, that was the wrong podcast episode: http://open.live.bbc.co.uk/mediaselector/5/redir/version/2.0/mediaset/audio-nondrm-download-low/proto/http/vpid/p04q834b.mp3

Ted S., Catskill Mtns., NY, USA

Remembering the Food Poisoning Horror Show of last November, I think all toilets should come with a self-destruct. It would save a lot of time.

This is what you get when you eat those pickled eggs.

pst314

Hipsters on the high seas.

Are they hipsters, or are they immigrant gangsters?

Darleen

Most cats won't take on rats.... Others are made of sterner stuff.

I have a friend who raises Angora goats in Kansas. She has barn cats (not exactly feral but not house cats otherwise) who control the rodents who look on barns as rat-heaven and a few LGDs (livestock guardian dogs)... huge breeds who start living with the goats as puppies so they imprint on the herd and aren't house dogs. They chase off, or even kill, coyotes.

champ

Looks like England isn't the only country with a rat problem:

https://pjmedia.com/lifestyle/report-paris-rat-population-swarms-6-million-three-every-man-woman-child/

Spiny Norman

Are they hipsters, or are they immigrant gangsters?

Not likely the former...

It appears that the three days and nights of fighting and brawling began with someone's shoe being stepped on. The twenty-three passengers ("of an extended family") booted from the ship are described by authorities as being "from Melbourne", but were also reported by fellow passengers as "going after the Aussies".

Hmm...

[ side eye ]

Darleen

When will these head/desk moments cease? Fortunately, the bruising on my forehead wasn't remarked on this week, just mistaken for Ash Wednesday.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

When will these head/desk moments cease?

Right, "...a student group was formed to protest too many white males eating at the campus “Little Pub.”"

According to the group’s description, PUB POWER aims to “have as many women possible attend pub lunch in order to dismantle [the] hegemony and reclaim the space as open to all.”

Open to all except, apparently, "...white, upper class, able-bodied males..."

Although the group acknowledges that any detrimental actions or tendencies of the white, upper class, and able-bodied men who tend to frequent Pub Lunch may be “unintentional”...

Gosh, that is mighty white big of you.

...the group asserts that their dominance over the space “makes women, alongside other LGBTQIA+ and POC members of our community feel inferior, unwelcomed, and outnumbered.”

Your histrionics and inferiority complex are not their fault, buttercup.

Captain Nemo

Edit: it was Christmas Day 1998, and I was seven. *facepalms*

Captain Nemo

Hopefully not posted here already, I present the Furby Organ:

*Shudders*. I'm not one for trigger warnings or safe spaces, but on opening that link I had a horrible flashback to Christmas Day 1997, when I, as a six year old, opened one of my presents to find the terrifying visage of a Furby staring up at me. What neither I, nor my parents realised, was the batteries my father had put in it were almost flat. The combination of the look of this frightening thing and the electronic banshee scream followed by a slow, stretched out "Fuuuuuurrrrrbbbbyyyyyyy" it emitted when I turned it on, sent me running and screaming in terror from the drawing room. Even today, that noise is one of the most chilling things I've heard in my life. *Shudders for a second time*.

Captain Nemo

How on earth did my correction get posted before my main comment, when I typed it and sent it after? Is your spam filter being troublesome again, David?

David

How on earth did my correction get posted before my main comment, when I typed it and sent it after?

I was just asking myself the same question.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Since we are being ephemeral, who knew that Alexander Fleming, discoverer of penicillin, was a cultured artist ?

R. Sherman

@Darleen & Farnsworth

Query how many white males is "too many?" What does the ration need to be between non-white males/everybody else for everyone else to feel "safe?" Stated differently, how many non-white "others" do you need to take on and beat one white dude in a pub fight?

In other matters, aren't those people who believes whites are superior to everyone else full of shit?

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Query how many white males is "too many?"

Just to be clear, it is "white, upper-class, able bodied" males, and I am guessing any whole number > zero is too many.

However, though evidently any number of BLTAT&SF+♫§ white men would OK, I'd bet a white male missing parts from an IED and going to the school on the GI bill would be considered "able-bodied" by their definition.

Monty James

West sent lizards as nuclear spies, claims Iran defense official

"Try to be a little less than your frivolous self, 007, and pay attention."

Farnsworth M Muldoon

I'll just leave this here...

...and go back to looking through the ads for remote mountaintop real estate.

Jonathan

In other news, Democrats respond to a man whose daughter was killed in the Florida School shooting with their usual class:

http://twitter.com/Chet_Cannon/status/964234637760389121

Spiny Norman

The combination of the look of this frightening thing and the electronic banshee scream followed by a slow, stretched out "Fuuuuuurrrrrbbbbyyyyyyy" it emitted when I turned it on, sent me running and screaming in terror from the drawing room.

Sorry Monty, but I simply cannot stop laughing. Was this event recorded for posterity?

Spiny Norman

Captain Nemo, rather.

[ smdh ]

I think my coffee is ready...

Spiny Norman

When will these head/desk moments cease?

The Spectator goes on to note that the protest group idea started after several Hamilton students attended the National Women’s Studies Association conference last November...
Ah, now it all begins to make sense.

pst314

According to the group’s description, PUB POWER aims to “have as many women possible attend pub lunch in order to dismantle [the] hegemony and reclaim the space as open to all.”

Since pubs have been traditionally male "spaces" since forever, women cannot "reclaim" what was never "theirs".

What's really going on, of course, is simply a war against men and in fact every part of our culture which is not explicitly and aggressively left-wing.

David

our esteemed host’s pickled eggs.

We’ve a new item on the menu.

Don’t be shy. Dip in.

R. Sherman

Don’t be shy. Dip in.

The wizened appendages of those who have disappointed you over the years? Perpetrators of bad HTML in the comments, perhaps?

Hal

We’ve a new item on the menu.

Don’t be shy. Dip in.

David; nice chair, looks comfortable.

Pogonip

Good Lord, what is that stuff?

Turk Turkleton

Lee Papa, an English professor who has spent years honing a blogging shtick where he says really rude and transgressive things, has some tough talk for gun owners now.

Turk Turkleton

Also.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Good Lord, what is that stuff?

Don't ask...

David

Note the clarity of the brine. Them’s quality eats.

Pogonip

From David’s menu, Good Lord, deliver us.

Pogonip

http://mysteriousuniverse.org/2018/02/russian-police-call-priests-to-exorcise-violent-poltergeist/

The poltergeist did not become violent until it tried the new whatever-those-are, after which it trashed the joint and flounced off to Russia in a huff.

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