Friday Ephemera

A stolen credit card, a convenience store and a getaway that doesn’t go quite to plan. (h/t, Gary) || The sizes of penises. Avert your eyes, ladies. || Look at these lovely kitchens instead. || Disney’s robot stunt doubles. || The basics, explained. || An airbag for your phone. || Meanwhile, at the Bolshoi. || Kindness of note. || Photographs of note. || Explore phantom islands. (h/t, Things) || Hardcore joinery. (h/t, Franklin) || He reviews sidewalks so you don’t have to. || Today’s word is testicondy. || Unrelated. || Not actually what it says. || Whoa, whoa! Be careful, dad! || Dispute of note. || How to operate your dining table. || Ride. || And finally, a tale of ambition and madness. His wife only wanted a potato storage pit.

Comments

[Ted S., Catskill Mtns., NY, USA]

Look at these lovely kitchens instead.

Notice all the housewives doing the housework in heels.

[Ted S., Catskill Mtns., NY, USA]

That time a bunch of American college students wound up on a Soviet TV game show

[Tman]

For those of you who were/are fans of the Metal Gear Solid video game series, here's that same convenience store arrest set to MGS sound effects.

https://twitter.com/OmarVillegasLA/status/1014284467966341120

[Darleen]

The basics, explained.

Add this to the exhibits.

[Daniel Ream]

that same convenience store arrest set to MGS sound effects.

There's a Yakety Sax version I can't stop laughing over.

Meth. It's a hell of a drug.

[Daniel Ream]

Add this to the exhibits.

"Now that I have completed the first year of my Master’s degree, I have had time to play these and other related events over in my mind. Was there anything I could have done differently?"

"Not gone to Concordia" would have been one option. Anyone ignorant of its reputation for leftist thuggery is simply being disingenuous.

Terry Newman is currently an MA student in the Media Studies Department at Concordia University in Montreal.

"Not gone to grad school majoring in Useless Studies" running a close second.

She is also a Teaching Assistant in Concordia’s Engineering Department.

They've learned nothing.

[David]

Morning, all.

Make way for the bicycle of education.

Via Stuart Ritchie.

[David]

For those who missed it yesterday, via Dicentra, a left-leaning journalist is confused.

And the tolerant left, part 3,044. More here.

[Alice]

Avert your eyes, ladies.

I looked and I'm not sorry.

[Clam]

Kindness of note

I'm not crying. You're crying.

[David]

I looked and I’m not sorry.

Fetch smelling salts and towels. And some kitchen catalogues. I think Alice has fallen into a deep erotic trance.

[JuliaM]

"Notice all the housewives doing the housework in heels."

Well, how else to reach & dust those over counter cabinets?

[rjmadden]

His wife only wanted a potato storage pit.

I'm showing this to my own dear wife next time she mentions fixing the garage door.

[David]

Well, how else to reach & dust those over counter cabinets?

I’m now picturing Julia cleaning the oven in a ballgown, glittering with jewellery.

It’s possible that third mug of coffee was a mistake.

[The Sage]

And part 3,045.

[David]

And part 3,045.

Again, their self-flattering psychodrama demands monsters, and so they see monsters.

It’s quite strange, though, to imagine sustaining that level of reactiveness, of lunatic outrage. I’ve encountered people wearing Marx t-shirts and hammer-and-sickle badges – suggesting an approval of atrocity on a scale far beyond anything in even the most feverish dreams of the anti-Trump left. And yet I’ve managed not to assault them or scream in their faces.

It’s almost as if what we’re seeing unfold, repeatedly, isn’t so much a political philosophy as a psychological condition.

[Hal]

Disney’s robot stunt doubles.

And the article even provides political---or whatever it is---commentary:

Disney imagineers have been woking . . .

[Hal]

He reviews sidewalks so you don’t have to.

Climbing the North Face of the Uxbridge Road

[David]

Climbing the North Face of the Uxbridge Road

Heh. I hadn’t seen that one.

[Adam]

Next time, Mr Arakelyan, consider a wife bin. They are a great time saver.

[Adam]

"Uxbridge Road" is funny, but far too white.

I ended up watching video of the 2018 Sao Paulo Carnaval as part of my multicultural reeducation.

[Burnsie]

And part 3,045.

No timeouts from the outrage. Not even on a Euro holiday in beautiful Denmark. Some people just don't know how to have fun.

The only missing piece here is the Che t-shirt she should've been wearing. She probably has one at home.

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

Handy guide to make sure your female characters are not incorrectly written.

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

And part 3,045.

He's in the jailhouse now
He's in the jailhouse now
Well I told him once or twice
Stealin' hats and throwin' Coke ain't nice
He's in the jailhouse now

[PiperPaul]

"Media Studies"

AKA, let's obsess over what we see in mainstream media and then mimic it (with of course the correct political bent).

[sH2]

Not actually what it says.

[David]

Is this pornography?

Heh. For someone, somewhere, possibly. Good thing we’re not a judgemental crowd.

[ Judging intensifies. ]

[pst314]

Now is the Time When We Juxtapose.™

A pair of stickers that reveal how tolerant those "coexist" people really are:

[David]

Now is the Time When We Juxtapose.™

Where’s that from?

[David]

And the tolerant left, part 3,044.

Today’s word, used ludicrously, is retaliation.

Via Dicentra.

[Pst314]

“Where’s that from?”

I thought it was from you, David, but google proves my memory wrong: it was from the Canadian blog Small Dead Animals. (Slips out the door in search of memory-enhancing nutritional supplements.)

[David]

memory-enhancing nutritional supplements.

The bar snacks are full of… goodness.

[fnord]

The bar snacks are full of… goodness.

That word doesn't mean what you think it does.

[David]

That word doesn’t mean what you think it does.

It’s the kind of goodness that fetches the varnish off the bar.

That’s flavour, that is.

[Daniel Ream]

Handy guide to make sure your female characters are not incorrectly written.

Our mission is to increase the percentage of accurate portrayals of women and girls

Likelihood That the Role of a Character Who is an Engineer or Computer Scientist Will be Portrayed by a Woman: In Prime Time - 1 in 14

Mission accomplished, then.

[Governor Squid]

One notes that the poster on writing female characters includes a couple of benchmarks showing women and blacks on TV versus real-life numbers, but no such benchmarks against the general population are presented for women and blacks in STEM or corporate management.

Somebody wanna call Geena Davis and see if we can get some infographics that include useful info?

[pst314]

The bar snacks are full of… goodness.

They make CMOT Dibbler's wares seem palatable.

[Hal]

The bar snacks are full of… goodness.

I'm currently reading through Night Fall---tactical note, read Secret Histories and Nightside first---

John looked around unhurriedly as a pair of gryphons came lurching across the lawns. Seriously ugly creatures, with a definite air of hunger about them. John reached into his jacket pocket and brought out the bag of special treats he’d brought with him. Martian meat balls, left over from the last time Martians from an alternative timeline had invaded the Nightside. For months afterwards, Martian meat had been top choice in all the best Nightside restaurants. These particular morsels had been wrapped in smoked red weed and soaked in the juices of human adrenal glands. Quite possibly the least requested bar-snack in Strangefellows’ history. John had made a point of collecting some from Alex before he left. Alex had been glad to get rid of them. He claimed some of them had started moving around when he wasn’t looking. John had heard of the Droods’ gryphons and thought Martian meat balls might be one of the few snacks no one had tried bribing them with.

[Adam]

his wife only wanted a potato storage pit

They NEVER only want a potato storage pit, said the man who started out doing a screen porch and ended up with a garage conversion for the wife's art projects.

[David]

They NEVER only want a potato storage pit,

I think I’m going to need to hear the ladies’ side of this before I commit to an opinion.

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

I think I’m going to need to hear the ladies’ side of this before I commit to an opinion.

As you swelter in your 25C "heat" because air conditioning has been deemed sexist, just remember, if the ladies want you to have an opinion on the matter, they will let you know what it is.

[Darleen]

I think I’m going to need to hear the ladies’ side of this before I commit to an opinion.

In my house we call it "mission creep" ... and since hubby generally freaks out (he can't help but starting down the road "if we do this, we'll need to do that...and that ... and then there's. OMG $$$$!!!") I'm usually the once to hoist the Mission Creep Flag to stop the speculating.

[Darleen]

Oh...btw... 1pm Pacific Daylight Time here in Rancho Cucamonga, California

113F/45C

Cheers!

[David]

I’m usually the one to hoist the Mission Creep Flag to stop the speculating.

I imagined you getting up in the middle of the night to loosen cupboard doors, then over breakfast pointing out that they need fixing, before producing detailed blueprints for a climate-controlled shoe closet.

What?

[Darleen]

before producing detailed blueprints for a climate-controlled shoe closet.

Next house. I'm building my patience cred right now.

Heh.

[Pogonip]

It’s cost me a bit
But I was still glad to git
My pit...

Two or three tons it holds
Even though my husband scolds
About my pit

I don’t know why I cook
By all these tater books...

[Monty James]

Well, at least the penises have been sufficiently covered.

[jabrwok]

"Uxbridge Road" is funny, but far too white.

But it's woke! The 29 year old leader of the expedition, Burt Tang(?), is a local headmaster and mother of three!

Daniel Ream: for your re-viewing pleasure: http://www.popularyoutube.com/video/yR8qd4LOwAo/Canadian-Bonnie-and-Clyde-Yakety-Sax

Our mission is to increase the percentage of accurate portrayals of women and girls

Nothing simpler!

[The Sage]

Today’s word, used ludicrously, is retaliation.

Heh!

[David]

Heh!

Also perversely used, the words personal responsibility. Because dressed like that, she he was just asking for it.

[David]

Heh!

I’m guessing that those busily excusing Mr Jimenez’s thuggery simply didn’t have the time to denounce his “toxic masculinity.”

[dw]

Also perversely used, the words personal responsibility. Because dressed like that, she he was just asking for it.

"Writer, teacher & broadcaster"

[David]

“Writer, teacher & broadcaster”

Apparently, any detectable sign of support for Trump, and specifically the sentiment “Make America great again,” is – and I quote - “the political emblem of a movement systematically dehumanising and persecuting minorities in an attempt to unite the majority through hate.” Of course, if you start from that assumption, what follows will tend to be absurd and hysterical too. And quite often, variations of the above seem to be used opportunistically as a fig-leaf rationalisation – a pretext to indulge in games of domination and other delinquent behaviour.

[Captain Nemo]

Interviewee upstaged:

https://twitter.com/notesfrompoland/status/1015289680227643393