Would a future women-only space colony have to live with that same fear? Would the very idea of a self-sufficient community of women so infuriate and threaten men that they would take it as a challenge to seek out and invade any feminist planet? And what about the frozen sperm?
I’m sorry. I’m reading the Guardian. Perhaps things will settle down.
If our future colony is reliant on what it can transport from Earth, stocks will eventually run out unless they can be replenished, which means giving birth to at least a few male children. Whether, in a matriarchal society without examples of male aggression, those boys would grow up to be the kind of man who grabs a peaceful protester by the back of her neck remains one of the great unknowns.
Or not. Never mind.
Readers may be tickled by the conceit that men would be infuriated and threatened by the departure from Earth of the planet’s feminists. And not, say, delighted. In fact, given recent trends, it seems more likely that feminists would be the ones determined to sabotage and eliminate any all-male spaces, while exempting themselves from comparable restrictions.
The rest is fairly predictable, the standard template, with jabs at “jowly white men in positions of power,” and inspirational rumblings in which women “just take the sperm and leave the men behind.” This bold vision of tomorrow is then traded for a more modest scenario, a compromise of sorts, in which, rather than being “redundant” and eliminated entirely, men are merely “educated… out of bullying and aggressive attitudes towards women” - an education that entails “putting women in positions of power on this planet before we think about how to populate others.”
We await the Guardian article in which a male columnist, perhaps white and somewhat jowly, ponders the appalling nature of women and how they require correction lest they contaminate the heavens with their inherent awfulness.
Via Guardian Science.
a self-sufficient community of women
Let me stop you right there.
Posted by: Mike | June 26, 2019 at 09:17
Oh Yes! - Ark B - that's a government project I can get behind
Posted by: TDK | June 26, 2019 at 09:26
Would the very idea of a self-sufficient community of women so infuriate and threaten men that they would take it as a challenge to seek out and invade any feminist planet?
Nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
Posted by: Joan | June 26, 2019 at 09:34
Whether, in a matriarchal society without examples of male aggression, those boys would grow up to be the kind of man who grabs a peaceful protester by the back of her neck remains one of the great unknowns.
Because boys growing up in homes without fathers always turn out to be so peaceful.
Posted by: Atempdog | June 26, 2019 at 09:40
Because boys growing up in homes without fathers always turn out to be so peaceful.
[ Slides fancy cocktail along bar. ]
On the house.
Posted by: David | June 26, 2019 at 09:45
After the colony fails:
"It wasn't real matriarchy."
Posted by: Atempdog | June 26, 2019 at 09:46
Other feminist ruminations on space travel can be found here and here.
Posted by: David | June 26, 2019 at 10:56
Would the very idea of a self-sufficient community of women so infuriate and threaten men that they would take it as a challenge to seek out and invade any feminist planet?
No. Just sit back and watch (and laugh) as the Strong, Independent Womxn see their society collapse around them while they're busy playing Mean Girl games and blaming the Patriarchy for the decay of their infrastructure (assuming they had one to begin with).
Posted by: jabrwok | June 26, 2019 at 11:15
I'm sure the colony will all go beautifully well until a spider or a mouse turns up.
Posted by: Dennisthemenace | June 26, 2019 at 11:25
If they don’t take along at least one guy, there’s no sense in packing any pickles...
Posted by: Lady Cutekitten of Lolcat | June 26, 2019 at 11:54
Raising Gazorpazorp
Posted by: JCL | June 26, 2019 at 12:17
Do we get to choose who goes?
Posted by: David Reed | June 26, 2019 at 12:28
In Herland, the women had evolved to give birth only to daughters, but if our future colony is reliant on what it can transport from Earth, stocks will eventually run out unless they can be replenished, which means giving birth to at least a few male children.
A few. Right, so in a couple generations they will all be nicely inbred, and as we have seen, that works out well in the long run.
There you go, I am sure those "women" would be more than willing to give up their precious bodily fluids for the sisterhood - problem sorted.
Yes, because that too is working out really well with the likes of May, Merkel, almost the entire government of Sweden, and a pile of our bozos over on this side of the pond.
I don't think she has really thought this through.
Posted by: Farnsworth M Muldoon | June 26, 2019 at 12:37
I think this is a wonderful idea. My ex can do there, and instead of having a major mountain range and 10-hour drive between us, we can have a fully galaxy.
And then she can have girl talk about how men stink, and about how her ex was awful....
Posted by: geek49203 | June 26, 2019 at 13:22
I can hardly wait for the hijinks at "that time of the month" since I read somewhere that women in close proximity, nurses, nuns etc. tend to synchronise. Just imagine all the tears and flying crockery, and not a single man for ten light years to blame!
Posted by: Robert the Biker | June 26, 2019 at 13:42
Readers may be tickled by the conceit that men would be infuriated and threatened by the departure from Earth of the planet’s feminists. And not, say, delighted.
Is there a Go Fund Me page?
Posted by: sH2 | June 26, 2019 at 14:01
https://davidthompson.typepad.com/davidthompson/2014/03/elsewhere-115.html
Posted by: Trent | June 26, 2019 at 14:39
a self-sufficient community of women so infuriate and threaten men
"CURSE THOSE DAMNED SULF-SUFFICIENT WOMEN! GRRRRRR! It makes my blood boil when women can TAKE CARE OF THEMSELVES! ATTACK IMMEDIATELY!!"
LOLOLOLOLOL...and a big ol honk honk. Thank you Guardian, you're a treasure.
Posted by: Sam | June 26, 2019 at 14:55
"Yes, but I can't get the bloody thing opened! Here, you try - I loosened it a bit."
/colony disappears in one generation
Posted by: Sam | June 26, 2019 at 14:59
In before the inevitable (in-Evita-ble?) B-Ark jokes.
Posted by: Sporkatus | June 26, 2019 at 15:39
“a matriarchal society without examples of male aggression”
But what about... no, I'm sure it'll be fine.
Posted by: Sam Duncan | June 26, 2019 at 15:42
Nevermind, missed the one at #2. A regular Jinsu of sharpness, I am.
Posted by: Sporkatus | June 26, 2019 at 15:51
A regular Jinsu of sharpness, I am.
I didn’t like to spoil the moment. You seemed so happy.
Posted by: David | June 26, 2019 at 15:58
I read somewhere that women in close proximity, nurses, nuns etc. tend to synchronise.
It turns out that's a myth. Get enough women in one spot with randomly distributed menses and enough of them will overlap to make it look like more than coincidence.
Posted by: Daniel Ream | June 26, 2019 at 16:26
Just imagine all the tears and flying crockery, and not a single man for ten light years to blame!
The idea that a mere ten light years distance would be enough to prevent feminists from blaming men is just so precious!
Posted by: fnord | June 26, 2019 at 16:48
I’m just going to leave this here, I think.
What?
Posted by: David | June 26, 2019 at 17:01
It turns out that's a myth. Get enough women in one spot with randomly distributed menses and enough of them will overlap to make it look like more than coincidence.
So, sort of like the Biorhythms fad of the sixties.
Posted by: pst314 | June 26, 2019 at 17:18
This mass migration effort would require huge amounts of resources, engineering and risky exploratory drive.
Can any point to any massive human exploration/migration project at all in human history that was driven by and accomplished by women?
Any?
Because the evil 'male agression'* is the same force that has accomplished so much (for good or not so good) in human history.
And there are very good evolutionary reasons why males have a rather different motivational drive than females.
Posted by: Jay | June 26, 2019 at 17:40
Research idea: Spend the day tomorrow listing all the things that women either can't, or won't do.
That community would be back to mud huts within the week.
Posted by: Jeff Guinn | June 26, 2019 at 17:56
https://www.returnofkings.com/32053/this-accidental-experiment-shows-the-superiority-of-patriarchy>"But it wasn't a true matriarchy."
Posted by: Uma Thurmond's Feet | June 26, 2019 at 17:59
Crap. Preview is still my friend.
But it wasn't a true matriarchy."
Posted by: Uma Thurmond's Feet | June 26, 2019 at 18:00
Isn't there a weight limit in space capsules? It's going to take a ling time to populate the feminist colony one Fat feminist at a time. Just saying.
Posted by: Jay Harper | June 26, 2019 at 18:23
Can any point to any massive human...migration project at all in human history that was driven by and accomplished by women?
Does the current invasion of Europe by the Musselmen count?
Posted by: jabrwok | June 26, 2019 at 18:24
Beautiful colors, not so beautiful deformities:
https://www.thisiscolossal.com/2019/06/tsubaki-goldfish/?mc_cid=d0a73b3da7&mc_eid=d63b7b651c
Posted by: Lady Cutekitten of Lolcat | June 26, 2019 at 18:43
It's going to take a ling time to populate the feminist colony one Fat feminist at a time. Just saying.
In space, they're all weightless. They might refuse to ever land.
They'll still have mass, though. Perhaps we can use them to deflect asteroids?
Posted by: Hopp Singg | June 26, 2019 at 18:44
Thought u all might enjoy this, I thought it was funny:
http://www.wisdomination.com/accurate-dictionary/
Posted by: Lady Cutekitten of Lolcat | June 26, 2019 at 18:51
My favorite comment:
I want that carved above my door. Or at least printed on a t-shirt.Posted by: Baceseras | June 26, 2019 at 18:51
TDK, 'ware dirty telephones.
Posted by: aelfheld | June 26, 2019 at 19:24
((Oops... I posted this to wrong thread … let me try again :::sigh::: then hope for more coffee))
that’s before you even get to the inflammatory question of who would be eligible for such a mission under the definition of “woman”.
Ruh-roh, writer Stephanie Merritt should hope she and her scare quotes don't come to the attention of Vivian Kane.
Posted by: Darleen | June 26, 2019 at 19:42
Thought u all might enjoy this,
And,
And,
So yes.
Posted by: David | June 26, 2019 at 19:51
Oops... I posted this to wrong thread…
I saw you wandering off and looking confused. I assumed you’d lost your shoes again.
Posted by: David | June 26, 2019 at 19:52
The Jar Of Testicles (pronounced like Hercules) sounds like something from Roman Mythology.
Posted by: Steve E | June 26, 2019 at 20:04
It does, doesn’t it?😄
Posted by: Lady Cutekitten of Lolcat | June 26, 2019 at 20:09
Has anyone seen my shoes?
Posted by: Lady Cutekitten of Lolcat | June 26, 2019 at 20:49
Has anyone seen my shoes?
Oh, heck. In my under-caffeinated state, I think I may be wearing them.
Posted by: Darleen | June 26, 2019 at 21:13
Can imagine the volume of white wine they'd have to import on a weekly basis?
Posted by: Sean Peake | June 26, 2019 at 21:21
''... the very idea of a self-sufficient community of women ...'' I guess it's possible, but I don't know if it's ever happened, except possibly in Stalinist Russia.
As for ''... in a matriarchal society without examples of male aggression, ...'', but what about female aggression? I seem to remember a recent discussion [on this site] about bitches [female dogs] being far more aggressive than male dogs and that led to a discussion about the aggressive nature of human females, mostly to each other as nature's way of securing the safety of the immediate family, including progeny.
Posted by: NTSOG | June 26, 2019 at 21:39
The fear that even in a happy, thriving matriarchy, a male child might "grow up to be the kind of man who grabs a peaceful protester by the back of her neck" . . . wait a sec, what is there left to protest about in a happy, thriving matriarchy?
Posted by: Baceseras | June 26, 2019 at 21:59
what is there left to protest about in a happy, thriving matriarchy?
How rude Maggie was when lecturing me about how I decoupled the quantum reactor, for starters! What. A. Bitch.
Posted by: Sam | June 26, 2019 at 22:13
No, Darleen is wearing David’s shoes. Who has MY shoes? Show of feet, please.
Posted by: Lady Cutekitten of Lolcat | June 26, 2019 at 23:36
the inflammatory question of who would be eligible for such a mission
I object in the strongest possible terms to the use of the word "inflammatory" as though it had negative connotations. The Differently Immune Systemed Community will endure this lexical genocide no longer. On their behalf, I demand The Guardian fire the author of that article and every editor who let the sentence pass, and further that their pensions and unused vacation time payout be donated to a bank account in the Caymans that will be used for, I dunno, Raising Awareness or something.
Posted by: bgates | June 26, 2019 at 23:41
Via Guardian Science.
*Snort*
Posted by: Burnsie | June 27, 2019 at 00:00
Writers at the Grauniad seem to have gone from reading about tests on sperm in outer space and possible human colonies on Mars to heady fantasies of Femtopias in the stars alarmingly quickly.
Posted by: TimT | June 27, 2019 at 01:29
If you have ever kept chickens you will have noticed that if there is no Rooster one of the females grows larger and starts to grow a Coxcomb. So .....
Posted by: Tony from Launceston (Tasmania) | June 27, 2019 at 04:14
I’ve read they may also start trying to breed the other females.
Tony, please tell us a bit about Tasmania.
Posted by: Lady Cutekitten of Lolcat | June 27, 2019 at 04:40
I'm guessing the first generation would be pretty uniformly oriented toward their own sex. Unless you believe that sexual orientation is rigorously genetically determined, though, a problem -- heterosexuality -- would begin to rear its (ahem) head in the second generation, and would need to be stamped out by social disapproval, psychiatric 'reeducation,' legal punishment, hormone 'therapy,' electroshock, etc. Whatever is required.
Only forty or so years into the colony's history and we're already settling into a dystopia that would make Orwell, Huxley AND Zamyatin blanch.
Posted by: Ron Butler | June 27, 2019 at 04:59
If you have ever kept chickens you will have noticed that if there is no Rooster one of the females grows larger and starts to grow a Coxcomb.
This is true, our chooks fall into this pattern.
After a number of years one of our chooks started adopting rooster-like habits, occasionally mating with the other chooks. The older ones occasionally try to crow, too. Though one thing roosters do is find food for the other chickens and keep all the flock in order; our self-appointed roosters felt no need to bother with that!
Mind you, our chooks never once cared if we misgendered them and didn't give a shit about what pronouns we used for them...
Posted by: TimT | June 27, 2019 at 05:37
aelfheld: TDK, 'ware dirty telephones.
One person got the reference! Thank you.
I doubt the women who write this garbage do their own cleaning.
Posted by: TDK | June 27, 2019 at 08:42
Twelve million pageviews. Bloody hell.
Excuse me while I lick my own eyebrows.
Posted by: David | June 27, 2019 at 08:42
Twelve million pageviews.
I knew you when you were a nobody. :-)
Posted by: sk60 | June 27, 2019 at 10:10
I knew you when you were a nobody. :-)
No change there. I realise it’s terribly vulgar to trumpet such things, but I’m surprised. A dozen years ago, this didn’t seem at all likely.
[ Dashes backstage, emerges in tuxedo, gestures for spotlight. ]
“I’d like to thank my agent, my hairstylist, and all of the little people who made me the towering glory that I am today…”
Posted by: David | June 27, 2019 at 10:22
From glowering Tory to towering glory?
(No pickled eggs for me tonight).
Posted by: TimT | June 27, 2019 at 10:38
"...if there is no Rooster one of the females grows larger and starts to grow a Coxcomb."
Does it also start wearing jeans and motorcycle boots?
I'll just let myself out.
Posted by: pst314 | June 27, 2019 at 12:36
Excuse me while I lick my own eyebrows.
Ah, but can you catch bugs in mid-flight?
Posted by: pst314 | June 27, 2019 at 17:35
I can on the rare occasions I see a lightning bug. They’ve become scarce around here the last few years. And I haven’t seen a June bug in at least 30 years. In these parts. at least, I think they may be extinct.
Posted by: Lady Cutekitten of Lolcat | June 28, 2019 at 00:49
Crack some beers, boys. Party at my house! They're gone!
Posted by: Biergood | June 29, 2019 at 13:36