You May Cross My Palm With Silver

For the last time this year, and with infinite subtlety, I’m going to remind patrons that this rickety barge, on whose seating your arses rest, is kept afloat by the kindness of strangers. If you’d like to help it remain buoyant a while longer, and remain ad-free, there’s an orange button below with which to monetise any love. Debit and credit cards are accepted. For those wishing to express their love regularly, there’s a monthly subscription option top left. And if one-click haste is called for, my PalPay.Me page can be found here. Additionally, any Amazon UK shopping done via this link or the search widget top right, or for Amazon US via this link, results in a small fee for your host at no extra cost to you.

For newcomers wishing to know more about what’s been going on here for the last twelve years or so, in close to 3,000 posts and over 100,000 comments, the reheated series is a pretty good place to start - in particular, the end-of-year summaries. If you like what you find there… well, there’s lots more of that.

If you can, do take a moment to poke through the discussion threads too. The posts are intended as starting points, not full stops, and the comments are where much of the good stuff is waiting to be found. And do please join in.

As always, thanks for the support, the comments, and the company. Also, open thread. 

Comments

[Colin the Lurker]

Thanks, David. PING!

[MrBobby]

Love the blog David. Ping!

[Hal]

David taking up fortune telling . . . .

[David]

PING!

Bless you, sir. May you never be faced with the moral quandary of whether to risk using a neglected bag of flour stuffed at the back of a cupboard and which, according to the packaging, expired some weeks ago.

[David]

Love the blog David. Ping!

Bless you, sir. May your curtain rails remain dustless.

[Alice]

A little something for the wine cellar. ;-)

[David]

A little something for the wine cellar. ;-)

Bless you, madam. May your bathroom be free of nail clippings of indeterminate age and origin.

[David]

Local councillor’s website bio of note.

Via Holborn.

[Y. Knott]

Ping! - I think. I'd done checkout and PayAppall decided it would not let me sign-out without giving it my cellphone #. I don't give ANYTHING to social-media outfits who demand it so I quit out, and I don't know if it went through.

Sorry, Mein Host - not my real name so I can't get you to check if you got it... :(

[David]

I can’t get you to check if you got it

If your initials are JG or SC, then yes, I did. If so, thanks. May you never be tasked with unblocking a bathroom plughole.

[Em]

This is the best blog I've ever lurked on. :-)

*kerching*

[Mike]

Have hit the tip jar. Consider it a thank you for all the band names.

[David]

*kerching*

Consider it a thank you for all the band names.

At some point, we’ll have to actually start rehearsing. Apparently, Mr Sherman has a spare room.

Bless you, madam, and sir. May your enemies know the frustration of desirable shoes that are unavailable in their size.

[Y. Knott]

"May you never be tasked with unblocking a bathroom plughole."

- Can't be me then. As a rather large guy in a houseful of long-haired women, I've lost count of how many plugholes I've ( - me, always me - ) unplugged over the years...

At least though, I have sneakily exacted my vengeance on their continual "Leave the seat DOWN!" caterwauls; I need it up, they need it down, right? So why must it always be left IAW THEIR needs, and never MINE?

Confucius* say, "Wise man avoid certain fights". So I leave the seat down - but I always close the lid. Now they must reposition something, too - and strangely, not one of them has ever caught-on. I'd laugh, or at least smirk; but surely, there are more triumphs to life than this?

*(Confucius say, "Woman always have last word in argument. Because if man say word after that, is first word in next argument."

Confucius' wife say, "Shut up Confucius."

Confucius say, "Yes dear.")

[Jonathan]

For the last time this year, and with infinite subtlety,

Consider yourself tipped...

[pst314]

Jonathan: "there’s an orange button below with which to monetise any love"

[David]

Consider yourself tipped...

[ Fondles tip. ]

Bless you, sir. May you never spill a large container of sugar across the kitchen surfaces before discovering what happens to sugar when you try to wipe it up with a slightly damp sponge.

[svh]

[ Fondles tip. ]

Actual LOL.

[David]

Actual LOL.

This is my innocent face.

[svh]

Also ping. :-D

[David]

Also ping.

Bless you, sir. May your butter dish never be blemished with unsightly residue.

[Jonathan]

David and pst314

[H]

before discovering what happens to sugar when you try to wipe it up with a slightly damp sponge.

Rookie mistake.

[David]

Rookie mistake.

It’s remarkable just how quickly the situation escalated from “Oh shit, it’s everywhere” to “Oh shit, it’s everywhere and now everywhere is really sticky.”

[Daniel Ream]

It’s remarkable just how quickly the situation escalated from “Oh shit, it’s everywhere” to “Oh shit, it’s everywhere and now everywhere is really sticky.”

Phrasing.

[David]

[ Innocent face intensifies. ]

[PiperPaul]

Phrasing.

Yes. Especially after the tip-fondling.

[David]

[ Looks at shoes, mumbles. ]

Jonathan started it.

[Jonathan]

Sneak!

[David]

It’s been said I get a little giddy on pay day.

[Clam]

You're a great host, David. Have bunged some quids in your tip jar.

[David]

Have bunged some quids in your tip jar.

Bless you, sir. May your burger buns be brioche and lightly toasted.

[Shiggz]

Since I use the Amazon app I am unsure how to have it give you credit via the link. Anyone know such things?

[David]

Thanks to all who’ve chipped in so far, including all those much too shy to say hello, or who’ve subscribed, or done shopping via the Amazon links. It’s what keeps this place here and is much appreciated.

[David]

Anyone know such things?

It doesn’t work via the app. Browsers only, I’m afraid.

[Governor Squid]

Also, open thread.

This portrait of a young IT professional in the Twin Cities came across my newsfeed, probably because of the hometown connection. I may not know this young woman, but I certainly recognize the type.

Bear in mind that the author shares all of these details voluntarily:
- 25-year-old analyst in IT.
- Scraping by on just $4,900 a month.
- Paying $1,850/mo in debt service on consumer debt, and $170 on her student loans.
- Lives at home (but pays a whopping $300/mo in rent!).
- Pays $24/mo on a movie theater subscription. Goes to the movies alone.
- Pays $100/mo for a fitness membership she doesn't use.
- Pays $225/mo for hosting and an editor for her vanity podcast. Characterizes this as "business expenses."
- Asks, "Why am I so generous even though I'm cash poor?"
- Broke up with her boyfriend last week.
- Receiving "nice sexts sent by someone" daily.
- Upset because she can't get an appointment with a shrink right away.
- Does not know what dashboard indicator lights mean.
- Cannot say no to doughnuts or sweets at the office.
- Starts Weight Watchers with her mom. Doesn't take the program seriously for even one day.
- Hides out in her employer's "meditation room" because she doesn't have enough to do.
- Is sad because her friends are getting married and moving away. Uses 'BumbleBFF' to find new friends.
- Spends Saturday night on Skype with her podcast co-host.

Now, the subject of this series is ostensibly to track how "modern working women" spend their money, but I think the column reveals so much more (mostly about the self-selection process for ignorant narcissists).

Also, I need to know where this young woman works. I'm sure my niece would love to get paid $89,000 a year to take typing tests, swipe around on Bumble, and fret about her weight and complexion. I worked most of my adult life before I found somebody who'd pay me that kind of money to hang out with all of you hooligans. Ping!

[David]

Upset because she can’t get an appointment with a shrink right away.

Maybe you should have led with that one.

Ping!

Bless you, sir. When unannounced houseguests come knocking, may you always be properly dressed.

[Shiggz]

So used browser from link to buy some shoes $127.00. Anyway to verify it worked and you got your cut?

I spend around 1-2k a Month on Amazon so if this works should add up for you.

[WTP]

Pinged.

For another case of Night Train. It's not just drank, it also does an excellent job disguising blood stains in the carpet.

[Daniel Ream]

Phrasing

Oh, and also ping.

I kind of think of this place as my equivalent of Callahan's.

[Darleen]

ping

A little something toward your fruitcake & eggnog fund.

[Darleen]

Oh ... and stating the obvious.

If one is rational, of course.

[sk60]

Something for your trouble, barkeep.

[David]

Morning, all.

Any way to verify it worked?

Once delivered, commissions should appear on my statement.

I spend around 1-2k a Month on Amazon so if this works should add up for you.

Bless you, sir. May you receive too many invitations to Christmas gatherings.

[David]

it also does an excellent job disguising blood stains in the carpet.

and also ping.

A little something toward your fruitcake & eggnog fund.

Something for your trouble, barkeep.

Bless you, sirs, and madam. May you never place a new white shirt into the washing machine and set it running, only to realise that someone, most likely yourself, has forgotten to remove an equally new, bright red tea towel, resulting in an unhappy wait to see just how colour-fast said tea towel actually is.

[David]

Remember, they’re so much classier than the rest of us.

[Jonathan]

Remember, they’re so much classier than the rest of us.

Our Superiors do it Too.

[Joan]

It’s remarkable just how quickly the situation escalated from “Oh shit, it’s everywhere” to “Oh shit, it’s everywhere and now everywhere is really sticky.”

Pro tip: vacuum cleaner.

Pinged. :-)

[David]

Pro tip: vacuum cleaner.

Well, that seems obvious now. But at the time, with dinner imminent, and faced with a kitchen covered almost entirely in soggy, sweet adhesive, I opted for some microfibre cloths, which seemed to do the trick, albeit inelegantly.

Pinged. :-)

Bless you, madam. May your level-5 raiding mission in Hades’ Star never be interrupted by a call from a long-winded and gossipy neighbour. Unless, of course, the gossip is really good.

[pst314]

Oh ... and stating the obvious.

Which illustrates why the left so fervently wants to harm Jordan Peterson.

[pst314]

Jordan Peterson on diversity, inclusivity and equity:
https://www.jordanbpeterson.com/political-correctness/equity-when-the-left-goes-too-far/

[Trevor]

Our Superiors do it Too

The guilty MPs should be named. I almost added 'and shamed' but of course these creatures are shameless.

[Governor Squid]

Jordan Peterson on diversity, inclusivity and equity:

It is so entertaining to walk a Feminist True Believer down this path, forcing her to defend the necessity for young women to be forced to take jobs as diesel mechanics, welders, electricians, loggers, and plumbers, while men take up their positions in office administration, teaching and day care.

Nineteen times out of twenty, the True Believer hasn't given a moment's thought to the fact that hundreds of her sisters will have to spend their hours up to their elbows in grime just so that one of them might occupy a corner office somewhere. The venom she will spew as her 'high ground' slides out from under her is something I wish I could capture and bottle.

My apologies to the group for my role in turning ignorant feminists into angry feminists. I just can't help myself!

[David]

The availability on campus of non-leftwing views, even in the form of a book club, may “cause stress to the student body,” and that simply isn’t allowed.

And this is the thing. Official campus channels, such as they are, will very often be occupied, something close to monopolised, by lefties. It’s usually just a question of degree. Hence the double standards in terms of which parties are likely to be denied or frustrated with obscure regulations and appeals to sensitivity, and which ones are indulged and given enormous latitude.

[David]

Provocative, yes, but not entirely unreasonable.

[RNB]

"The STEM Draft Act of 2023: Until such time as the percentage of women / woman-identified persons actively engaged in careers in STEM fields matches the percentage of women / woman-identified persons in the general population (+/- 1%), 10% of women / woman-identified persons applying for educational opportunities at colleges / universities / other institutions of higher education shall be mandatorily redirected to educational paths in engineering, mathematics, or science curricula (not to include "science" curricula designated by another field of study as a modifying prefix, e.g., "political science" or "social science.")

[bgates]

It is so entertaining to walk a Feminist True Believer down this path

Also fun with default pronouns, as in:

Despite claiming responsibility for the gruesome murder of over half a dozen prostitutes, she was never caught.

[Liz]

Thanks for the laughs, David. Tip jar hit.

[David]

Tip jar hit.

Bless you, madam. When photographed unexpectedly, may it always be from the kindest of angles.

[Fred Z]

I sent you 25 of the finest. Great blog, especially ephemera.

[David]

Great blog, especially ephemera.

Bless you, sir. May your bathroom mirror remain free of toothpaste spray.

[David]

Again, thanks to all who’ve chipped in, including all those much too shy to say hello, or who’ve subscribed, or done shopping via the Amazon links. It’s what keeps this place here and is much appreciated.

[Alan]

Don't usually comment but I read your blog every week. Small token of appreciation left in your tip jar.

[David]

Small token of appreciation left in your tip jar.

Bless you, sir. May the aesthetic of your jacket never be compromised by the thick winter gloves you’ve got stuffed in the pocket.