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December 13, 2019

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Hal

Beverage of note.

Soooo, in a restaurant, will there be a cockage fee?

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Ancient ruins, reconstructed.

1. The Parthenon...

Here it is, fully restored to its original glory. Athena herself would be proud.

OTOH, they could have just gone to Nashville.

pst314

Peter Sellers: A Hard Day's Night:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zLEMncv140s

pst314

Satire or reality?
https://babylonbee.com/news/narwhal-tusk-surrender-bins-installed-throughout-UK

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Pete Drake and his talking guitar, 1964.

Alvino Rey and his talking guitar way before Drake. Along with the talk box, one of his "talking" techniques of rolling the volume on and off was later used by the late great Roy Buchanan, usually in conjunction with a bend, to make a unique cry/wail you can't get with a bend alone - around 3:09 in this video

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Oopsies.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Putin, it had to have been Putin, any other explanation is just unpossible.

Chester Draws

Twitter is a cesspool at the best of times, but the meltdown on the losers in the British election is spectacular to see. Anyone to blame but themselves, it seems.

Fay

Watches final British election returns. Retires to bed happy.

How much I wish I could have had the same sentiments after the Canadian election, sigh.

David

Morning, all.

Watches final British election returns. Retires to bed happy.

Alas, I can think of one woman who won’t be thrilled:

Make that two.

David

A Guardian perspective.

David

Anyone to blame but themselves, it seems.

Apparently, it’s all down to “right wing white supremacy.

Squires

Apparently, it’s all down to “right wing white supremacy.”

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/d/dd/OctopusNAS1.jpg

Hal

Alas, I can think of one woman who won’t be thrilled: . . . . A Guardian perspective.

I'm reading of the Conservatives collecting 364 seats.

Back in 2015, the final count was only 330 or so . . . .

Clam

A Guardian perspective.

Denial. Not just a river in Egypt.

Jonathan

Apparently, it’s all down to “right wing white supremacy.”

Labour: Spends the last 20 years demonising the English as racist, xenophobic, homophobic, fascistic Little Englanders.

Also Labour: " Why won't they vote for us?"

Jonathan

" This is some f**kin National Geographic s**t...."

David

Denial. Not just a river in Egypt.

As noted here many times, from pretty much the start, you have to marvel at just how readily socialists, professed egalitarians, will display naked disdain for actual working-class people, whose values and priorities often deviate from those of their self-imagined betters. What we might call The Islington Sensibility. Such that readers of the Sun newspaper can be framed by Guardian columnists as “Middle England,” “Little England,” an enemy of the left, and therefore contemptible.

From crime and policing to mass immigration, there is, I think, a pattern, a shift in allegiance. One that’s apparently been noticed by quite a few voters. A point demonstrated, at times vividly, in this documentary by Martin Durkin.

Tom

What could possibly go wrong?

Can you say "Attractive Nuisance" children? I knew you could!

Perfect for pubs where the owner is looking to be sued into destitution, with shades of WKRP in Cincinnati - "As God is my witness, I did not know glass could cut you!"

[+]

Unpriced goods on aisle four.

It's fresh but it won't feed four people.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

A Guardian perspective.

Another Guardian perspective*.

Apparently, it’s all down to “right wing white supremacy.”

Of course; along with the Russkis and also an "establishment media that is a mouthpiece for the right" - amazing that your nitwits say the same thing as ours when they lose.

*("Our Washington-based research firm, Fusion GPS, conducted much of the early investigations into Russia’s support of the Trump campaign, aided by our colleague Christopher Steele...) The Guardian, always with the sources they think are unimpeachable...

Farnsworth M Muldoon

I may be wrong, but didn't this already happen around the 5th & 6th centuries ?

pst314

"Never mind the dog's bollox, we're the Brexit Pistols."

David

I may be wrong, but didn’t this already happen around the 5th & 6th centuries?

I’ll attempt to translate.

“How dare voters wish for a referendum result regarding national sovereignty to be honoured and actually mean something, like promises generally should? Why are they acting as if there were anything at all ominous or symbolic about the treacherous obstructions and open disdain for the preferences of the electorate? Why won’t they just shut up and defer to their betters - people like me, who’ll call them racist, in a witlessly racist manner, for having priorities other than mine?”

Something along those lines.

pst314

Dog's bollox from here:
https://twitter.com/Holbornlolz/status/1205265229233500224

WTP

Re Make that two...

Commonwealth citizens can vote, Irish citizens, people with no fixed address can vote, not-quite-18-year-olds can vote, if you can't leave your house to vote in person you can vote by proxy or post. VOTE BITCH.
So curious...is it the case that if one lives in some Godfersaken place like Pakistan or Canada, or even (WTF?) Ireland, if one makes their way to the UK they can vote in a UK election? I'm not following the 'logic' on this. Surely I (or Miss Elenaor) have something wrong here?

David

Further to Laurie’s bewilderment, this seems apposite.

David

Also, this.

Mark G

Your British robins are adorable little birds. The North American robin is a ravenous thrush that would have been ripping those flowers asunder seeking fat earthworms to devour.

David

Labour: Spends the last 20 years demonising the English as racist, xenophobic, homophobic, fascistic Little Englanders.
Also Labour: “Why won’t they vote for us?”

More samples of a trend:

According to unfunny far-left comedian and self-styled “decent person” Mark Steel, if you’re pleased at the election result, or just relieved to have dodged the bullet of Jeremy Corbyn being in power and having dinosaur Marxists in charge of the economy, then you’re a “nasty, selfish, racist, foul fuckwit.” No other possibilities being conceivable, you see.

See also the ludicrous Paul Mason.

It’s as if they just can’t help themselves. Apparently, we now have “a vicious right-wing regime.”

Farnsworth M Muldoon

This rather explains a lot, never go full Bernie.

Karl

Mincemeat is both meat and minced. So there.

WTP

Mincemeat is both meat and minced.

And it's made out of mouses. Can't prove it right now but I'm sure there's a video somewhere...

Sam

This Russia thing has gone beyond funny into dangerous delusion. Perhaps it’s the steady diet of Disney movies adults now consume, with their competent but maniacal villains and protagonists beyond reproach. It was standard practice to blame America/Britain first but I guess after several generations of lefty rule that particular dissonance is now a net electoral liability.

Given the rules of Oppression Olympics I guess Russia drew the short straw, what with being white, traditional, and no longer full communist. At least anti-commie scaremongers of yore could use actual instances of ideology based oppression to support an overall villain narrative. Now? We’re supposed to believe a 2nd world frozen backwater is chock full of bored internet wizards intent on thwarting progressive election aims worldwide? Fucking WHY?!?

Karl

And it's made out of mouses.

You may be thinking of another Christmas treat?

WTP

You may be thinking of another Christmas treat?

Nah. I'm thinking of a more elusive, and yet at the same time ironically ubiquitous, French Canadian delicacy.

Karl

French Canadian delicacy.

Oooh la la, very niche!

Karl

Hmmm, I believe Jo Swinson is demanding a second "People's Election"?

Steve E

and yet at the same time ironically ubiquitous

Yes, Savoir Faire is everywhere!

Farnsworth M Muldoon

... I believe Jo Swinson is demanding a second "People's Election"

A question for youse in Blighty - I have seen similar noise about a "People's Vote" having been denied - if this wasn't a "people's vote", what the hell was it, or is this just more yammering about there not having been another Brexit specific referendum, which again, this really was at least in part, what the hell do they want ? Another do-over where just the commies get to vote ?

David

Apparently, the Conservatives won because they “promised to persecute immigrants.”

It says so here.

Remember, we begin hunting the poor at 9pm.

Karl

A question for youse in Blighty...

Well, a "People's Vote" is a bit like a referendum, but one where the people vote the way they've been fucking told.

Sam

Theodore Dalrymple's take on a Journal of Medical Ethics paper exploring the moral hazards of transwomen (that's bloke-to-bird for the uninitiated) in sport.

The paper's conclusion was breathtaking in it's baldfaced double-think:

We conclude that it is important to both extend and celebrate diversity, while maintaining fairness for cis-women in sport. To be simultaneously inclusive and fair at the elite level the male/female binary must be discarded in favour of a more nuanced approach. We conclude that the gender binary in sport has perhaps had its day.

I like bullet point lists, and translate this serious paper in a serious journal as follows:

- We believe treating women and transwomen fairly is a laudable goal.
- But we also believe that goal should no longer be pursued because we have a super smart plan to achieve fairness, which, again, is the goal.
- The plan is this: ciswomen in sports can go f*ck themselves.

The malicious stupidity burns bright with this one. "Deciding between competing interests is hard, so y'all should just pretend there's no competing interests and BOOM, Bob's your Aunt - problem solved." I mean, are lefty women really going to buy this forever? (Yes)

Sam

we begin hunting the poor at 9pm

Who here was also surprised by the success of The Purge movie(s)? The premise is too stupid to be anything more than a sketch or short story. I thought maybe it was the "kill the rich" fantasy aspect that appealed to the masses, but then someone told me the rich benefited the most and therefore propagated the "Purge". Ugh, oh well, still better than The Last Jedi.

David

The paper’s conclusion was breathtaking in its baldfaced double-think

A less contorted perspective can be found here.

Karl

baldfaced double-think

It's so hard to keep up with these intersectional agonies.
I rather thought that feminists were completely dedicated to the concept that there could be no possible differences between men and women, to the extent that when Harvard President Lawrence Summers suggested distributional IQ differences might explain the paucity of women in science it so outraged biology professor Nancy Hopkins that she "felt I was going to be sick". Resulting in the inevitable hounding of Summers from his position.

That being so, it's difficult now to summon much sympathy when they complain of being beaten at their own game.

Sam

Karl - careful to not confuse "feminists" with "women", despite the former claiming they speak for ALL of the latter. Having said that...yes, the solution to this particular problem is wholly up to women to discover and implement.

Steve E

Theodore Dalrymple's take...

From the article:

"(we seem to live increasingly in a world of various micro-totalitarianisms)"

That.

Karl

careful to not confuse "feminists" with "women"

Fair point. And these "women" of which ye speak. How many of them rushed to Larry Summers defence exactly?

Karl

And these "women" of which ye speak.

And immediately on posting that I can think of three - right off the top of my head! But it's not yet close enough to Christmas for me to charitably withdraw my remark :)

Farnsworth M Muldoon

...we begin hunting the poor at 9pm...

Speaking of the transgendered, start with AuntieFa, they seem to be upset.

TimT

Swinson, on Radio 4’s Today programme, was asked by Justin Webb whether she believes that “biological sex exists”. She replied: “Not on a binary, from what I’ve read. I’m not going to pretend that I’m an expert in the subject but I don’t think that things are as binary as are often presented.”

Well, considering the bicameral division of parliament and the history of the Lib-Dems, that’s a rather sad and wistful thing for Swindon to be saying.

Sam Duncan

“On the matter of mincemeat.”

The real confusion comes when you want a pie with mince in it. (For future reference, the usual term is “mince round”.)

“vegan Christmas dinner”

+++ DOES NOT COMPUTE +++

“Get a load of this guy.”

Yupyupyupyupyupyupyup.

Karl

"mince round"???

No look it's really quite simple - a mince pie has mincemeat in it and a mincemeat pie has mince in it.

WTP

I'll leave this little comment from another blog here for y'all across the pond to enjoy.

No, you simply know a different group of people, whom the people I know would say are seriously and fundamentally wrong (and no doubt the reverse is true). But the anti Brexit people I know are people whi are not very partisan, and show intelligence and rationality in all other areas.

Whereas the pro Brexit people I have encountered on the Net are remarkably similar in their views to the more rabid Trump supporters in the US who support Brexit for much the same reason that Trump supporters support him; hostility to things outside their country, a feeling of powerlessness in the face of bureaucratic government, and a delusion that their preferred solution will change that despite every fact pointing to the reverse outcome.

Karl

...a delusion that their preferred solution will change that despite every fact pointing to the reverse outcome.

Curious. If that were so, why their hysterical, nay demented, opposition to it?

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Speaking of preferred solutions, who's a good widdle totalitarian ? Yes you are, yes you are.

Uma Thurmond's Feet

"Whereas the pro Brexit people I have encountered on the Net are remarkably similar in their views to the more rabid Trump supporters in the US who support Brexit for much the same reason that Trump supporters support him; hostility to things outside their country, a feeling of powerlessness in the face of bureaucratic government, and a delusion that their preferred solution will change that despite every fact pointing to the reverse outcome."

He assumes that getting rid of those responsible for "a feeling of powerlessness" is considered a bad thing. Because that person cynically assumes that if Britain succeeds in hoisting over the side one set of unelected, unresponsive rulemakers in Brussels, that they will fail in doing the same to those that will replace them in London.

Just checking.

(Personally, I blame John Mortimer, for whinging on about those miserable, fat, Belgian bastards* in his Rumpole stories.)

* Python reference

TimT

Given Jeremy Corbyn's repeated association with numerous terrorists, and what seemed to be a persistent anti-semitism encouraged by him in the party, the left must be high on something to think they'll persuade anyone with their new line 'Johnson won because you're all racist!'

TimT

Mince pies as they are are quite delicious, but it must be said the old medieval idea of preserving mince meat with fruit and spices was quite persistent. I believe you can find Mrs Beeton recipes (late 19th century) for mincemeat containing actual meat. And pretty much all of her fruit mince recipes contain suet, anyway.

I think it's a delightful idea. The effect would be quite like a sweet curry.

Fred the Fourth

On the one hand, "pro-fa" riots, protests, insults, teargas (eventually).

On the other hand, delightful mince, mincemeat, and meat pies.

On the gripping hand, it's Friday the 13th and my water heater blew up, to the tune of $3K.

Life. WTF, mate.

Darleen

who's a good widdle totalitarian

She said: 'Unfortunately, we probably already know the outcome. World leaders are still trying to run away from their responsibilities but we have to make sure they cannot do that.

'We will make sure that we put them against the wall and they will have to do their job to protect our futures.'

The Red Guard lives and Mao smiles.

TimT

On the one hand, "pro-fa" riots, protests, insults, teargas (eventually).

On the other hand, delightful mince, mincemeat, and meat pies.

On the gripping hand, it's Friday the 13th and my water heater blew up, to the tune of $3K.

Life. WTF, mate.

Also, penis fish.

pst314

On the gripping hand...

Every leftist is Crazy Eddie but without the wisdom.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

The Red Guard lives and Mao smiles.

Nonsense, she is apolitical, just ask her.

Darleen

Also, penis fish.

Kansas Woman. Yes, Kansas.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Kansas Woman.

Some things you can't make up.

Shelby Gash...

That and her lights, horse and carriage, peanut butter and chocolate, just made to go together.

Meanwhile, and related, Jeremy Clarkson discusses problems with filming the first episode of the fourth season of The Grand Tour.

WTP

What with all the news excitement, I'm just getting around to clicking the links....

The Maginot Line

What is the German for "speed bump"?

I'll take lame WWII jokes for $600 now, Alex.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

The Maginot Line

What is the German for "speed bump"?

Nein...

WTP

Well, I did say it was lame.

Fred the Fourth

pst314,
I's afreard you got that bass-ackward there.

Crazy Eddie was ignored because it pushed ideas which had never been tried before. Crazy, sure, but novel.

Leftists should be fought because they insist on replicating the disasters of history.
Crazy, and guaranteed to fail with a massive death toll. Again.

Fred the Fourth

penis fish...
Well, OK, [chuckles genteel-like] I've seen odd-looking stuff in the water before...[scroll, scroll]
HOLY F**K WHAT IS ALL THAT ON THE BEACH!!!

Fred the Fourth

Look, I come in here expecting to decompress from the stresses of modern life. Like the water heater explosion. And then someone thinks it might be funny to sneak in a horror show like that [shudder] penis fish beach.
(Any odds on this being the first time that phrase has been written anywhere?)
So here's the deal.
I want a double, neat...no. TWO doubles, neat, of whatever that is in the Klein bottle hidden behind the expired Hump Fat jars.
And I want whoever took the key to the upstairs hot tub to cough it up, pronto.
And then I'm gonna go up there and get me another Gentle Correction from the henchlesbian on duty.
All you heathens can stay down here and watch another showing of Cries And Whispers.
[sob]

Daniel Ream

penis fish beach.
(Any odds on this being the first time that phrase has been written anywhere?)

Every other language calls it some variation on "penis fish", except English, which calls it the "fat innkeeper worm".

The etymologist in me is warning me not to investigate that discrepancy.

Steve E

I want a double, neat...no. TWO doubles, neat, of whatever that is in the Klein bottle hidden behind the expired Hump Fat jars.

As our inimitable host would say, "No refunds. Credit note only."

Although, with respect to your water heater, I can commiserate. My dishwasher committed hara kiri today. Lightly leaking water in an undetectable spot, just enough for the computer to shut the whole thing down with an "LE" error.

PiperPaul

Unexpected Penis Fish.

TimT

It is rather like a real-life Viz comic, innit.

David

Not an entirely unfair comment.

David

Eleanor Penny, Laurie’s sister, seems to believe - and very much want to believe - that a fairly soft conservative government will immediately result in nightly racial purges and parents eating their children.

I can’t help suspecting that the erupting tearfulness is the result of effort and contrivance. A performance of sorts.

David
“Tory scum, off our streets.”

The leftist intelligentsia, I see.

Horace Dunn

Eleanor Penny, Laurie’s sister, seems to believe - and very much want to believe - that a fairly soft conservative government will immediately result in nightly racial purges and parents eating their children.

It's interesting that if Boris Johnson refers to an EU Withdrawal Agreement as a "surrender bill" and dismisses specious arguments as "balderdash" then he is using inflamatory language to encourage violence and divide our society.

When a lefty talks - sorry bleats - about "long term war" and holding those who disagree with her "personally accountable" as she is "incandescent", then that leftie is just being caring.

But thanks for sharing the link, David. I laughed out loud. I mean what a silly little girl she is.

David

I laughed out loud. I mean what a silly little girl she is.

And yet eerily of a type. And given the relatively humdrum nature of British politics, I can’t help thinking that political affiliation isn’t an ideal vehicle for something akin to religious fanaticism. I mean, if the election of Boris Johnson, a squishy conservative by any measure, reduces you to apocalyptic wailing and weeping, or recreational scuffling with the police, then there’s probably something wrong with you.

David

No laughing.

Mags

No laughing.

LOL

Ted S, Catskill Mtns, NY, USA

Darleen:

I think I've posted this before.

(Technically, it's Christmas lights on a palm tree.)

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Penisfish meets essential men's wear accessories.

WTP

essential men's wear

Oh, let's stop dicking around and get serious.

Anon a mouse

I may be wrong, but didn't this already happen around the 5th & 6th centuries ?

Well, sort of. We took it a bit further in 1776...

Farnsworth M Muldoon

No laughing.

UK version...

Anon a mouse

Oh, let's stop dicking around and get serious.

Hmm. I might not be able to pull that off - will be flying and the TSA isn't especially sensitive enough...

Charlie Suet

Whiling away the hours on Thursday evening, I turned to Tinder and Bumble for distraction from the prospect of a return to the 70s but with worse music.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with these dating apps, profiles are shown on the basis of popularity. If you get more matches, you will be shown to more people. You can, however, pay for your profile to be given a brief moment in the sun - usually about 30 minutes.

On Thursday evening, after weeks of silence, large numbers of profiles kept popping up exhorting me to vote Labour. These profiles generally had fewer photos than normal and nothing in the usual biography sections other than hashtags and quotations from the Labour manifesto. After the vote closed, and on Friday morning, these profiles disappeared.

Am I grouping or is it possible that Labour attempted to use dating apps to get London based millennials to vote for them? Seems like a waste of money if so.

David

UK version...

Heh.

pst314

pst314, I's afreard you got that bass-ackward there.
Crazy Eddie was ignored because it pushed ideas which had never been tried before. Crazy, sure, but novel.
Leftists should be fought because they insist on replicating the disasters of history.

As I recall, Crazy Eddie also pushed ideas which had failed many times before--the Crazy Eddie drive, various technical and political solutions to the deadly Cycles, and so on. Sometimes new ideas but also old ideas.

My thought was merely that while Crazy Eddie seemed to always have noble motives, leftists usually have reprehensible motives--and they are pushing ideas which have failed disastrously time and again. (But did not fail for the rulers, who enjoyed luxurious lives and the exercise of power over others.) (And here you can detect that when I wrote 'wisdom' I was using it to denote both good judgement and good morals.)

A quote from the novel for those who have not read it:

"When a city has grown so overlarge and crowded that it is in immediate danger of collapse . . . when food and clean water flow into the city at a rate just sufficient to feed every mouth, and every hand must work constantly to keep it that way . . . when all transportation is involved in moving vital supplies, and none is left over to move people out of the city should the need arise . . . then it is that Crazy Eddie leads the movers of garbage out on strike for better working conditions."

pst314

Penisfish meets essential men's wear accessories.

Trust GQ to pay a silly twat to pontificate sophomorically. I doubt there is anyone at GQ who is not a silly twat.

pst314

Unexpected Penis Fish.

I am thankful that I do not live in a neighborhood where there is such a thing as an expected penis fish.

Sam Duncan

Ken Loach:

No other Labour leader has had the abuse that Jeremy Corbyn has. No other leader has been called a terrorist when he’s a man of peace, or a racist when he’s been opposed to racism all his life

No (although no other Labour leader has consorted with active terrorists either), but every single Tory leader for the last forty years has. And some of them still managed to win.

Some idiot on that thread (it isn't short of them) saying that “Labour doesn't get to play by the same rules as the Tories”. No, it doesn't. But for the first time in decades, it was forced to: even the media couldn't hide from Corbyn's sinister past. And its supporters, used to an easy ride - there have been “n days to save the NHS” at every election I can remember, and it's never challenged; hell, not even this time - can't can't handle it.

“I doubt there is anyone at GQ who is not a silly twat.”

Seems like a safe working assumption.

Jonathan

More sweet, sweet leftist tears of tolerance.....

via Titania McGrath

David

Ken Loach

Ah yes, him.

Captain Nemo

Today's words are tolerance and compassion. From an aspiring doctor too, no less.

https://twitter.com/TitaniaMcGrath/status/1205859214360481792

Sam Duncan

“Today's words are tolerance and compassion.”

Oh, yah. Those working-class voters are, like, rahlly, rahlly... stupid, yah?

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