Friday Ephemera

Blowback. || Corgi buns. || Because they should be. || Bargain detected. || Unexpected duo. || Small dog makeover of note. (h/t, Elephants Gerald) || This, this and this are three of these. (h/t, Damian) || They’re just like normal people. || Assorted long cats. || “Chocolate chicken chicken cake” and other A.I. recipes. || Is it food? || Forbidden love. || Torment yourself with four-way Tetris. || 48 trombones. || Felted wool. || Furry pig monster. || Puddle scenes. || It did not go entirely to plan. || And finally, it’s remarkable just how quickly the day can turn to shit.

Comments

[Fred the Fourth]

Love...
13/10 Would hire that sitter again.

[juliaeryn]

sorry if people have already come across this (I am often late to the party), but this floored me:
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2020/feb/05/pregnancy-vermont-paid-parental-leave-abortion-difficult-decision

The absolute lack of personal responsibility is astonishing. Who would have thought of using contraceptives (even two types, to be extra careful) for a few months to hold off a pregnancy until you qualify for maternal leave. No, it's better to give no consideration to this, instead you should consider whether to emotionally blackmail a HR rep to bend the rules just for you, then have a termination, then write a guardian column about the terrible terrible system. It's also a good idea to not give any thought to why the rule might exist in the first place (coz obv partiarchy/class warfare duh).

It also seemed biased in favor of non-pregnant women and their spouses. Hows that, exactly?

[Steve E]

The absolute lack of personal responsibility is astonishing.

This woman is so self-absorbed her friends call her Kotex.

[Chester Draws]

David, that was an astounding Ephemera. The best ever! I particularly enjoyed the trombones.

I shall go find that thing at the bottom of some of your posts that you don't seem to know what it does.

[Fay]

sorry if people have already come across this (I am often late to the party), but this floored me. Me too, particularly this:

"Our inability to afford the pregnancy was not only due to an absence of paid family leave, it also hinged on the absence of many other foundational support systems currently lacking for most Americans, including universal childcare and healthcare and a living minimum wage."

Because, G-d knows, people the world over have only ever been able to have babies because they received paid family leave (haha), universal child care, health care and a "living" wage. Jesus wept.

[Joan]

“Chocolate chicken chicken cake” and other A.I. recipes

Brownies with a CUP OF HORSERADISH.

[David]

Morning, all.

Brownies with a CUP OF HORSERADISH.

New vistas of sensory pleasure are opening before us.

I shall go find that thing at the bottom of some of your posts that you don’t seem to know what it does.

Bless you, sir. May you never be obliged to sit through Police Academy 5, even with the sound off.

[Mike]

it’s remarkable just how quickly the day can turn to shit.

Needs a kill switch.

[David]

Needs a kill switch.

It looks like they’d accidentally engaged CRUSH, KILL, DESTROY mode.

[sH2]

They’re just like normal people.

"School social worker"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HOlX6ZuGEVM

[Darleen]

Job hazzards.

[Rafi]

Brownies with a CUP OF HORSERADISH.

And shrimps.

[David]

And shrimps.

And then there’s the baffling feast involving chilies, lettuce and 21 pounds of cabbage.

[David]

It’s a lot to take in.

[Jacob]

It’s a lot to take in.

Is the tax advice nude or just the psychic stuff?

[David]

It’s oddly quiet today, comment-wise. Maybe there are people lurking in the bushes.

[ Starts thrashing bushes with stick. ]

[Lurker]

[ Starts thrashing bushes with stick. ]

Ow!

[David]

It’s just slightly unnerving when the incoming traffic is normal, but everyone’s being terribly quiet.

[ Bush-thrashing intensifies. ]

[Lurker]

[ Bush-thrashing intensifies. ]

Ow! Ow! Ow!

Oh...that's...nice...

[ComputerLabRat]

[ Bush-thrashing intensifies. ]

Harder! Better! Faster! Stronger! Great tie-in with one of your ephemera :P

I did love the 48 trombones one - always did like that song. That made a day that started with getting iced in and late for work so much better.

Now I'm trying to think of the song about a large number of trombones that led a big parade...wasn't 48, was it? 76! That's it.

[WTP]

With a hundred and ten cornets close at hand.

[David]

Harder! Better! Faster! Stronger!

I was concerned I might be insufficiently scintillating.

But that’s crazy talk.

[WTP]

I was concerned I might be insufficiently scintillating.

Well I was working up a segue from the Science Shit Posts and the A.I. recipes, but I thought I'd let it...uh...pass. Also, I hate spelling the word 'recipes'. It's not so much that I don't know how to spell it (unlike 'restaurant' and 'bureaucracy'), it's just that spelling out 'recipes' makes me feel like I'm being gaslighted.

[WTP]

How's that for crazy talk?

[[+]]

“Chocolate chicken chicken cake” and other A.I. recipes.

Contains large chicken (whole) but no chocolate.

What's a BACON HOLE?

[David]

What’s a BACON HOLE?

The mind boggles.

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

The mind boggles.

I cannot decide what is more troubling, the fact that they would have to add that those parts are boneless, or that they felt compelled to invert them.

[David]

I cannot decide what is more troubling,

Would anyone care for a bar snack? They’re flavoursome. And boneless.

[pst314]

Would anyone care for a bar snack? They’re flavoursome. And boneless.

Is your supplier named CMOT Dibbler?

[Lady Cutekitten]

Another wokester:

https://www.theamericanconservative.com/dreher/sunny-singh-never-sunny-in-wokeadelphia/

I have minimal experience with college (2 classes 25 years ago), but it seemed to me that a pop quiz on Garcia Marquez counting for, say, 15% of the student’s grade, would have caused that guy to develop an absorbing interest in Garcia Marquez PDQ, albeit such an approach would not have allowed the teacher to have fun melting down.

[David]

Another wokester

A pretty good example of what Heather Mac Donald refers to as “brittle victim identities.”

[Steve E]

A pretty good example of what Heather Mac Donald refers to as “brittle victim identities.”

One of the many crimes committed by academia is to infuse it's long term denizens with a sense of infalliblity based on the credentials they are granted.

[Squires]

brittle victim identities

I prefer “weaponized vapors”.

[Angus]

Obviously, after your first item, the male population of your blog went out to buy flammable gas and ammo and hence where too busy to comment.

[Lady Cutekitten]

I Can’t Even because I’m still shaking... 😳

😄

[WTP]

SMOD now pandering for votes from the left...

https://mobile.twitter.com/sahilkapur/status/1225838433765072896

[WTP]

Another wokester

Anyone the least familiar with the three books she's teaching?

[Lady Cutekitten]

Pride—no
Garcia Marquez—life’s too short. Trust me on this.
I must have overlooked the 3rd book, can’t find it now, sorry.

Wowsers. If she got that hysterical about the kid who, sensibly enough, refused to read GM, she’ll probably jump off a bridge when she sees all those tweets in reply. 😳

[WTP]

Just wiki'd the books and realized that I had heard of 100 Years of Solitude, the other two...nope. If this was a required course, well ideally I'd say he should have chosen another college, but that's not exactly practical in many ways. These are not canons of Western Civilization, these books are recently introduced narrative, possibly BS, that for all we know in ten years will be as relevant as Bulwer-Lytton.

[Baceseras]

100 Years of Solitude was a surprise best-seller when the very fine English language version was published. (It has been said that the translator, Gregory Rabassa, "made" Garcia Marquez a great writer.) It started the Latin American fiction boom in the US -- similar to the Scandinavian crime fiction boom earlier this century

The novel is a multi-generation family saga; considered just as storytelling, its grip on a reader is substantially reduced as the generations pass. But if you're capable of being drawn onward just by prose mastery, Rabassa's version is unputdownable.

I can add that the book remains "culturally important" throughout Latin America, so possibly some people will want to read it to satisfy a kind of sociological curiosity. This angle doesn't do anything for me: if that's all there is, it's enough to know about the book w/o going to the trouble of reading it.

Of the other books mentioned, I think Haroun and the Sea of Stories is by Rushdie. His reputation as a fiction writer seems to me an artifact of publicity. The other two novels I never heard of till now. Bastard of Istanbul, my notes tell me, is about the Armenian genocide. All these books, the Rushdie and the others, seem to be aimed at the best-seller list which Garcia Marquez / Rabassa hit by luck. I have my doubts about them as a "curriculum," but then I'm unimpressed by the academic handling of pop culture generally.

[Alex DeWynter]

Job hazzards.

Pretty much the last thing I'd be doing in that situation is putting the microphone anywhere near either of my tits.

[Chester Draws]

The English version of 100 Years of Solitude is very well written, and the story passable. I think making students read some magical realism is quite reasonable in a literature course. Liking it is beside the point -- I didn't like having to memorise the whole periodic table, but it had to be done.

I won't read Bastard of Istanbul because I refuse to read or watch any genocide fiction.

I don't read Rushdie. He writes offensive stuff because he can, and I don't like him.

[Mags]

"To Compete With Space Force, Democrats Propose Space IRS"

https://babylonbee.com/news/to-compete-with-space-force-democrats-propose-space-irs

[Lady Cutekitten]

I found 100 Years equally boring in English & Spanish. It starts off good, but, as family members keep dying off, so, inevitably, does the plot. It’s not as unreadable as, say, Moby Dick, but I can’t blame the kid for not wanting to plow through it. Most kids I know who had to read it just used the Cliffs Notes. This kid probably saw a chance to have Fun With Teacher, and took it.

[David]

To Compete With Space Force, Democrats Propose Space IRS

Heh.

[David]

Stunning and brave.

[MC]

Garcia Marquez is well worth checking out, as is Mario Vargas Llosa.

[PiperPaul]

From https://pjmedia.com/news-and-politics/the-question-that-explains-almost-everything/

"Well, there is one other thing: fighting for the very existence of the world itself. That is the animating impulse of the left's obsession with global warming. "(T)he world is going to end in 12 years if we don't address climate change," says Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez."

Are extreme leftists the sort of people who would actively encourage and assist in "ending the world" if they don't get their way?

[Trevor]

Garcia Marquez—life’s too short. Trust me on this.

Oh, I do. I was forced to endure two whole terms studying the Oscar Lewis bilge Children of Sanchez during the Anthropology half of my degree. I vowed then never again to read an author or title that contained the letter'Z'. It's served me quite well.

[Adam]

Cube Apples - Is this a transphobic meme? If so, I am deeply offended. If not, well, it's still just an apple.

Day gone to shit - My Inner Bloomberg notices that neither the operator nor the other workers were wearing safety vests or hardhats. Also, the machine was not equipped with a 'dead man' switch to prevent exactly the scenario that emerged. Regulatory infractions aside, it was damn funny.

The ironically named Sunny Singh - There might be a clue in that story as to why fewer men are going to college these days. Tell the instructor you don't like one of the assigned books and she makes it all about herself and your racism. What about the book? Don't they analyze and discuss them any more?

Essay: "Comment on the environmental and social justice impacts of white male oppression on indigenous peoples of South America viewed through the lens of One Hundred Years of Solitude. How does Marquez suggest we approach social and environmental justice through direct action to disrupt traditional structures of oppression?"

[Ted S, Catskill Mtns, NY, USA]

My surname has a Z. :-(

[Adam]

The woman who aborted to protest lack of paid family leave might have visited her local DHS office to apply for any number of available support programs. As George Bush said to Al Gore in Presidential debate: "You don't have to get snippy about it."

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

I vowed then never again to read an author or title that contained the letter'Z'.

Russian and especially Polish authors hardest hit.

Stunning and brave.

Stunning and honk.

[Col. Milquetoast]

The perfect accessory for a £1 engagement ring would be a fake receipt that says it cost £7900.

[David]

[ Fondles wedding ring. ]

[pst314]

[ Fondles wedding ring. ]

Is the inside of the ring inscribed with letters of fire?

[David]

Is the inside of the ring inscribed with letters of fire?

Heh. Something like that.

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

You could be getting a Moronolanche, David Thompson explains:; you might want to put down the sawdust and get out the bum wine.

The ring - that green will come off with a little Brasso or toothpaste. £1 doesn't buy what it used to, you know...

[David]

Apparently, shoplifting, and championing shoplifting, is woke now.

Please update your files and lifestyles accordingly.

[David]

You could be getting a Moronolanche,

Help me take the padding out of the seats. And hide your valuables.

[David]

Right, heading out for a family curry to mark Beloved Sister-In-Law’s birthday. Wine may be involved.

Play nicely. Use coasters.

[Uma Thurmond's Feet]

Garcia Marquez is well worth checking out, as is Mario Vargas Llosa.

I recommend MVL's "Aunt Julia and the Scriptwriter," about a young man's affair with his aunt. Lots of stuff about storytelling.

If you don't have time to read, or don't read, it was turned into a movie called "Tune in Tomorrow" with a young Keanau Reeves and Barbara Hershey, with Peter Falk. Wonderful movie.

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

Depressed ? Just take your cabbage out for a walk, and melt those blues away.

The idea is simple: you feel as lonely and as simple as a cabbage, so you begin to act like one and befriend one.

Vegans, proving a lack of animal protein diminishes mental functioning.

Chen continued, “It doesn’t need feeding or leave a mess on the pavement. In fact, afterwards, I can throw the cabbage away..."

Heartless bastards, a vegetable can respond to you.

[Rick]

Hello David,et al. Not sure if you have seen this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CENZuzfv1Ec concerning our favourite red-headed, cognitively dissonant, privileged but utterly unappreciative communist, projecting all her ideological flaws onto the British citizenry. Without the slightest self-awareness she, the tolerant one, will not tolerate an electorate that doesn't agree with her hate filled views of an opposing argument. Not one scintilla of empirical evidence is offered to bolster her slanderous accusations but hey, these are my feelings so sacrosanct.

[sH2]

"Milton Keynes, the famous economist..."

https://twitter.com/JonahDispatch/status/1226309690482556928

[David]

our favourite red-headed, cognitively dissonant, privileged but utterly unappreciative communist, projecting all her ideological flaws onto the British citizenry.

As we’ve seen many, many times, Laurie’s relationship with reality is at best intermittent, and what her outpourings reveal, albeit inadvertently, is generally about herself.

[David]

“Milton Keynes, the famous economist...”

Oh dear.

[David]

Today, I’ve just realised, is this blog’s 13th birthday.

[ Pats blog. ]

Happy birthday, old girl.

[Alice]

Happy birthday, old girl.

Happy birthday, David's blog.

[Ted S, Catskill Mtns, NY, USA]

Congratulations on 13 years. I just hit 12 at the end of last month. Close to 5200 posts....

[David]

Congratulations on 13 years. I just hit 12 at the end of last month.

Are we… the old guard now?

[ Applies moisturiser. ]

[Anon a mouse]

Harder! Better! Faster! Stronger!

Ah. "Beat me Daddy, eight to the bar" ver 2.0?

[Trevor]

Harder! Better! Faster! Stronger!

Sounds like a Russ Meyer film.

[pst314]

Are we… the old guard now?

Here grandfather, allow me to help you across the street.

[Lord of the Fleas]

Brownies with a CUP OF HORSERADISH ... And shrimps ... large chicken (whole) but no chocolate ...

I certainly hope this isn't anyone complaining, now. This is simply the culinary equivalent of cultural diversity, and you DO sing the praises of diversity, don't you?

(Well, except for the one who left out the chocolate. Racist!)

[Fay]

Happy birthday, old girl.

A Birthday ping, headed your way! Cheers🎉.

[Hal]

Here grandfather, allow me to help you across the street.

[David]

A Birthday ping, headed your way!

Bless you, madam. May an otherwise routine Saturday morning be enlivened with bacon French toast.