Friday Ephemera
February 07, 2020
Blowback. || Corgi buns. || Because they should be. || Bargain detected. || Unexpected duo. || Small dog makeover of note. (h/t, Elephants Gerald) || This, this and this are three of these. (h/t, Damian) || They’re just like normal people. || Assorted long cats. || “Chocolate chicken chicken cake” and other A.I. recipes. || Is it food? || Forbidden love. || Torment yourself with four-way Tetris. || 48 trombones. || Felted wool. || Furry pig monster. || Puddle scenes. || It did not go entirely to plan. || And finally, it’s remarkable just how quickly the day can turn to shit.
Love...
13/10 Would hire that sitter again.
Posted by: Fred the Fourth | February 07, 2020 at 00:41
sorry if people have already come across this (I am often late to the party), but this floored me:
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2020/feb/05/pregnancy-vermont-paid-parental-leave-abortion-difficult-decision
The absolute lack of personal responsibility is astonishing. Who would have thought of using contraceptives (even two types, to be extra careful) for a few months to hold off a pregnancy until you qualify for maternal leave. No, it's better to give no consideration to this, instead you should consider whether to emotionally blackmail a HR rep to bend the rules just for you, then have a termination, then write a guardian column about the terrible terrible system. It's also a good idea to not give any thought to why the rule might exist in the first place (coz obv partiarchy/class warfare duh).
It also seemed biased in favor of non-pregnant women and their spouses. Hows that, exactly?
Posted by: juliaeryn | February 07, 2020 at 02:19
The absolute lack of personal responsibility is astonishing.
This woman is so self-absorbed her friends call her Kotex.
Posted by: Steve E | February 07, 2020 at 03:06
David, that was an astounding Ephemera. The best ever! I particularly enjoyed the trombones.
I shall go find that thing at the bottom of some of your posts that you don't seem to know what it does.
Posted by: Chester Draws | February 07, 2020 at 03:41
sorry if people have already come across this (I am often late to the party), but this floored me. Me too, particularly this:
"Our inability to afford the pregnancy was not only due to an absence of paid family leave, it also hinged on the absence of many other foundational support systems currently lacking for most Americans, including universal childcare and healthcare and a living minimum wage."
Because, G-d knows, people the world over have only ever been able to have babies because they received paid family leave (haha), universal child care, health care and a "living" wage. Jesus wept.
Posted by: Fay | February 07, 2020 at 05:38
“Chocolate chicken chicken cake” and other A.I. recipes
Brownies with a CUP OF HORSERADISH.
Posted by: Joan | February 07, 2020 at 06:40
Morning, all.
Brownies with a CUP OF HORSERADISH.
New vistas of sensory pleasure are opening before us.
I shall go find that thing at the bottom of some of your posts that you don’t seem to know what it does.
Bless you, sir. May you never be obliged to sit through Police Academy 5, even with the sound off.
Posted by: David | February 07, 2020 at 07:04
it’s remarkable just how quickly the day can turn to shit.
Needs a kill switch.
Posted by: Mike | February 07, 2020 at 07:34
Needs a kill switch.
It looks like they’d accidentally engaged CRUSH, KILL, DESTROY mode.
Posted by: David | February 07, 2020 at 07:40
They’re just like normal people.
"School social worker"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HOlX6ZuGEVM
Posted by: sH2 | February 07, 2020 at 08:04
Job hazzards.
Posted by: Darleen | February 07, 2020 at 08:19
Brownies with a CUP OF HORSERADISH.
And shrimps.
Posted by: Rafi | February 07, 2020 at 09:32
And shrimps.
And then there’s the baffling feast involving chilies, lettuce and 21 pounds of cabbage.
Posted by: David | February 07, 2020 at 09:46
It’s a lot to take in.
Posted by: David | February 07, 2020 at 11:05
It’s a lot to take in.
Is the tax advice nude or just the psychic stuff?
Posted by: Jacob | February 07, 2020 at 11:12
It’s oddly quiet today, comment-wise. Maybe there are people lurking in the bushes.
[ Starts thrashing bushes with stick. ]
Posted by: David | February 07, 2020 at 14:21
[ Starts thrashing bushes with stick. ]
Ow!
Posted by: Lurker | February 07, 2020 at 14:42
It’s just slightly unnerving when the incoming traffic is normal, but everyone’s being terribly quiet.
[ Bush-thrashing intensifies. ]
Posted by: David | February 07, 2020 at 14:49
[ Bush-thrashing intensifies. ]
Ow! Ow! Ow!
Oh...that's...nice...
Posted by: Lurker | February 07, 2020 at 15:01
[ Bush-thrashing intensifies. ]
Harder! Better! Faster! Stronger! Great tie-in with one of your ephemera :P
I did love the 48 trombones one - always did like that song. That made a day that started with getting iced in and late for work so much better.
Now I'm trying to think of the song about a large number of trombones that led a big parade...wasn't 48, was it? 76! That's it.
Posted by: ComputerLabRat | February 07, 2020 at 15:14
With a hundred and ten cornets close at hand.
Posted by: WTP | February 07, 2020 at 15:18
Harder! Better! Faster! Stronger!
I was concerned I might be insufficiently scintillating.
But that’s crazy talk.
Posted by: David | February 07, 2020 at 15:19
I was concerned I might be insufficiently scintillating.
Well I was working up a segue from the Science Shit Posts and the A.I. recipes, but I thought I'd let it...uh...pass. Also, I hate spelling the word 'recipes'. It's not so much that I don't know how to spell it (unlike 'restaurant' and 'bureaucracy'), it's just that spelling out 'recipes' makes me feel like I'm being gaslighted.
Posted by: WTP | February 07, 2020 at 15:28
How's that for crazy talk?
Posted by: WTP | February 07, 2020 at 15:29
“Chocolate chicken chicken cake” and other A.I. recipes.
Contains large chicken (whole) but no chocolate.
What's a BACON HOLE?
Posted by: [+] | February 07, 2020 at 15:45
What’s a BACON HOLE?
The mind boggles.
Posted by: David | February 07, 2020 at 15:51
The mind boggles.
I cannot decide what is more troubling, the fact that they would have to add that those parts are boneless, or that they felt compelled to invert them.
Posted by: Farnsworth M Muldoon | February 07, 2020 at 17:17
I cannot decide what is more troubling,
Would anyone care for a bar snack? They’re flavoursome. And boneless.
Posted by: David | February 07, 2020 at 17:28
Would anyone care for a bar snack? They’re flavoursome. And boneless.
Is your supplier named CMOT Dibbler?
Posted by: pst314 | February 07, 2020 at 17:32
Another wokester:
https://www.theamericanconservative.com/dreher/sunny-singh-never-sunny-in-wokeadelphia/
I have minimal experience with college (2 classes 25 years ago), but it seemed to me that a pop quiz on Garcia Marquez counting for, say, 15% of the student’s grade, would have caused that guy to develop an absorbing interest in Garcia Marquez PDQ, albeit such an approach would not have allowed the teacher to have fun melting down.
Posted by: Lady Cutekitten | February 07, 2020 at 20:38
Another wokester
A pretty good example of what Heather Mac Donald refers to as “brittle victim identities.”
Posted by: David | February 07, 2020 at 20:51
A pretty good example of what Heather Mac Donald refers to as “brittle victim identities.”
One of the many crimes committed by academia is to infuse it's long term denizens with a sense of infalliblity based on the credentials they are granted.
Posted by: Steve E | February 07, 2020 at 21:17
brittle victim identities
I prefer “weaponized vapors”.
Posted by: Squires | February 07, 2020 at 22:23
Obviously, after your first item, the male population of your blog went out to buy flammable gas and ammo and hence where too busy to comment.
Posted by: Angus | February 08, 2020 at 01:11
I Can’t Even because I’m still shaking... 😳
😄
Posted by: Lady Cutekitten | February 08, 2020 at 01:11
SMOD now pandering for votes from the left...
https://mobile.twitter.com/sahilkapur/status/1225838433765072896
Posted by: WTP | February 08, 2020 at 01:20
Another wokester
Anyone the least familiar with the three books she's teaching?
Posted by: WTP | February 08, 2020 at 01:28
Pride—no
Garcia Marquez—life’s too short. Trust me on this.
I must have overlooked the 3rd book, can’t find it now, sorry.
Wowsers. If she got that hysterical about the kid who, sensibly enough, refused to read GM, she’ll probably jump off a bridge when she sees all those tweets in reply. 😳
Posted by: Lady Cutekitten | February 08, 2020 at 01:46
Just wiki'd the books and realized that I had heard of 100 Years of Solitude, the other two...nope. If this was a required course, well ideally I'd say he should have chosen another college, but that's not exactly practical in many ways. These are not canons of Western Civilization, these books are recently introduced narrative, possibly BS, that for all we know in ten years will be as relevant as Bulwer-Lytton.
Posted by: WTP | February 08, 2020 at 01:48
100 Years of Solitude was a surprise best-seller when the very fine English language version was published. (It has been said that the translator, Gregory Rabassa, "made" Garcia Marquez a great writer.) It started the Latin American fiction boom in the US -- similar to the Scandinavian crime fiction boom earlier this century
The novel is a multi-generation family saga; considered just as storytelling, its grip on a reader is substantially reduced as the generations pass. But if you're capable of being drawn onward just by prose mastery, Rabassa's version is unputdownable.
I can add that the book remains "culturally important" throughout Latin America, so possibly some people will want to read it to satisfy a kind of sociological curiosity. This angle doesn't do anything for me: if that's all there is, it's enough to know about the book w/o going to the trouble of reading it.
Of the other books mentioned, I think Haroun and the Sea of Stories is by Rushdie. His reputation as a fiction writer seems to me an artifact of publicity. The other two novels I never heard of till now. Bastard of Istanbul, my notes tell me, is about the Armenian genocide. All these books, the Rushdie and the others, seem to be aimed at the best-seller list which Garcia Marquez / Rabassa hit by luck. I have my doubts about them as a "curriculum," but then I'm unimpressed by the academic handling of pop culture generally.
Posted by: Baceseras | February 08, 2020 at 03:46
Pretty much the last thing I'd be doing in that situation is putting the microphone anywhere near either of my tits.
Posted by: Alex DeWynter | February 08, 2020 at 04:42
The English version of 100 Years of Solitude is very well written, and the story passable. I think making students read some magical realism is quite reasonable in a literature course. Liking it is beside the point -- I didn't like having to memorise the whole periodic table, but it had to be done.
I won't read Bastard of Istanbul because I refuse to read or watch any genocide fiction.
I don't read Rushdie. He writes offensive stuff because he can, and I don't like him.
Posted by: Chester Draws | February 08, 2020 at 06:05
"To Compete With Space Force, Democrats Propose Space IRS"
https://babylonbee.com/news/to-compete-with-space-force-democrats-propose-space-irs
Posted by: Mags | February 08, 2020 at 07:48
I found 100 Years equally boring in English & Spanish. It starts off good, but, as family members keep dying off, so, inevitably, does the plot. It’s not as unreadable as, say, Moby Dick, but I can’t blame the kid for not wanting to plow through it. Most kids I know who had to read it just used the Cliffs Notes. This kid probably saw a chance to have Fun With Teacher, and took it.
Posted by: Lady Cutekitten | February 08, 2020 at 07:53
To Compete With Space Force, Democrats Propose Space IRS
Heh.
Posted by: David | February 08, 2020 at 08:17
Stunning and brave.
Posted by: David | February 08, 2020 at 08:38
Garcia Marquez is well worth checking out, as is Mario Vargas Llosa.
Posted by: MC | February 08, 2020 at 09:12
From https://pjmedia.com/news-and-politics/the-question-that-explains-almost-everything/
"Well, there is one other thing: fighting for the very existence of the world itself. That is the animating impulse of the left's obsession with global warming. "(T)he world is going to end in 12 years if we don't address climate change," says Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez."
Are extreme leftists the sort of people who would actively encourage and assist in "ending the world" if they don't get their way?
Posted by: PiperPaul | February 08, 2020 at 10:20
Garcia Marquez—life’s too short. Trust me on this.
Oh, I do. I was forced to endure two whole terms studying the Oscar Lewis bilge Children of Sanchez during the Anthropology half of my degree. I vowed then never again to read an author or title that contained the letter'Z'. It's served me quite well.
Posted by: Trevor | February 08, 2020 at 11:49
Cube Apples - Is this a transphobic meme? If so, I am deeply offended. If not, well, it's still just an apple.
Day gone to shit - My Inner Bloomberg notices that neither the operator nor the other workers were wearing safety vests or hardhats. Also, the machine was not equipped with a 'dead man' switch to prevent exactly the scenario that emerged. Regulatory infractions aside, it was damn funny.
The ironically named Sunny Singh - There might be a clue in that story as to why fewer men are going to college these days. Tell the instructor you don't like one of the assigned books and she makes it all about herself and your racism. What about the book? Don't they analyze and discuss them any more?
Essay: "Comment on the environmental and social justice impacts of white male oppression on indigenous peoples of South America viewed through the lens of One Hundred Years of Solitude. How does Marquez suggest we approach social and environmental justice through direct action to disrupt traditional structures of oppression?"
Posted by: Adam | February 08, 2020 at 13:28
My surname has a Z. :-(
Posted by: Ted S, Catskill Mtns, NY, USA | February 08, 2020 at 13:37
The woman who aborted to protest lack of paid family leave might have visited her local DHS office to apply for any number of available support programs. As George Bush said to Al Gore in Presidential debate: "You don't have to get snippy about it."
Posted by: Adam | February 08, 2020 at 13:41
I vowed then never again to read an author or title that contained the letter'Z'.
Russian and especially Polish authors hardest hit.
Stunning and brave.
Stunning and honk.
Posted by: Farnsworth M Muldoon | February 08, 2020 at 14:33
The perfect accessory for a £1 engagement ring would be a fake receipt that says it cost £7900.
Posted by: Col. Milquetoast | February 08, 2020 at 15:30
[ Fondles wedding ring. ]
Posted by: David | February 08, 2020 at 15:42
[ Fondles wedding ring. ]
Is the inside of the ring inscribed with letters of fire?
Posted by: pst314 | February 08, 2020 at 16:49
Is the inside of the ring inscribed with letters of fire?
Heh. Something like that.
Posted by: David | February 08, 2020 at 17:00
You could be getting a Moronolanche, David Thompson explains:; you might want to put down the sawdust and get out the bum wine.
The ring - that green will come off with a little Brasso or toothpaste. £1 doesn't buy what it used to, you know...
Posted by: Farnsworth M Muldoon | February 08, 2020 at 17:42
Apparently, shoplifting, and championing shoplifting, is woke now.
Please update your files and lifestyles accordingly.
Posted by: David | February 08, 2020 at 17:46
You could be getting a Moronolanche,
Help me take the padding out of the seats. And hide your valuables.
Posted by: David | February 08, 2020 at 17:56
Right, heading out for a family curry to mark Beloved Sister-In-Law’s birthday. Wine may be involved.
Play nicely. Use coasters.
Posted by: David | February 08, 2020 at 18:23
Garcia Marquez is well worth checking out, as is Mario Vargas Llosa.
I recommend MVL's "Aunt Julia and the Scriptwriter," about a young man's affair with his aunt. Lots of stuff about storytelling.
If you don't have time to read, or don't read, it was turned into a movie called "Tune in Tomorrow" with a young Keanau Reeves and Barbara Hershey, with Peter Falk. Wonderful movie.
Posted by: Uma Thurmond's Feet | February 08, 2020 at 19:39
Depressed ? Just take your cabbage out for a walk, and melt those blues away.
Vegans, proving a lack of animal protein diminishes mental functioning.
Heartless bastards, a vegetable can respond to you.
Posted by: Farnsworth M Muldoon | February 08, 2020 at 19:39
Hello David,et al. Not sure if you have seen this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CENZuzfv1Ec concerning our favourite red-headed, cognitively dissonant, privileged but utterly unappreciative communist, projecting all her ideological flaws onto the British citizenry. Without the slightest self-awareness she, the tolerant one, will not tolerate an electorate that doesn't agree with her hate filled views of an opposing argument. Not one scintilla of empirical evidence is offered to bolster her slanderous accusations but hey, these are my feelings so sacrosanct.
Posted by: Rick | February 09, 2020 at 04:47
"Milton Keynes, the famous economist..."
https://twitter.com/JonahDispatch/status/1226309690482556928
Posted by: sH2 | February 09, 2020 at 08:18
our favourite red-headed, cognitively dissonant, privileged but utterly unappreciative communist, projecting all her ideological flaws onto the British citizenry.
As we’ve seen many, many times, Laurie’s relationship with reality is at best intermittent, and what her outpourings reveal, albeit inadvertently, is generally about herself.
Posted by: David | February 09, 2020 at 08:44
“Milton Keynes, the famous economist...”
Oh dear.
Posted by: David | February 09, 2020 at 09:48
Today, I’ve just realised, is this blog’s 13th birthday.
[ Pats blog. ]
Happy birthday, old girl.
Posted by: David | February 09, 2020 at 10:01
Happy birthday, old girl.
Happy birthday, David's blog.
Posted by: Alice | February 09, 2020 at 13:08
Congratulations on 13 years. I just hit 12 at the end of last month. Close to 5200 posts....
Posted by: Ted S, Catskill Mtns, NY, USA | February 09, 2020 at 13:20
Congratulations on 13 years. I just hit 12 at the end of last month.
Are we… the old guard now?
[ Applies moisturiser. ]
Posted by: David | February 09, 2020 at 13:28
Harder! Better! Faster! Stronger!
Ah. "Beat me Daddy, eight to the bar" ver 2.0?
Posted by: Anon a mouse | February 09, 2020 at 14:23
Harder! Better! Faster! Stronger!
Sounds like a Russ Meyer film.
Posted by: Trevor | February 09, 2020 at 15:14
Are we… the old guard now?
Here grandfather, allow me to help you across the street.
Posted by: pst314 | February 09, 2020 at 16:28
Brownies with a CUP OF HORSERADISH ... And shrimps ... large chicken (whole) but no chocolate ...
I certainly hope this isn't anyone complaining, now. This is simply the culinary equivalent of cultural diversity, and you DO sing the praises of diversity, don't you?
(Well, except for the one who left out the chocolate. Racist!)
Posted by: Lord of the Fleas | February 09, 2020 at 19:53
Happy birthday, old girl.
A Birthday ping, headed your way! Cheers🎉.
Posted by: Fay | February 09, 2020 at 22:34
Here grandfather, allow me to help you across the street.
Posted by: Hal | February 10, 2020 at 00:49
A Birthday ping, headed your way!
Bless you, madam. May an otherwise routine Saturday morning be enlivened with bacon French toast.
Posted by: David | February 10, 2020 at 06:20