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February 25, 2020

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John D

Journalism.

https://twitter.com/Holbornlolz/status/1232221206050492421

David

Journalism.

Oh dear.

Xas7wcrg9e

Journalism.

#Anschluss. Again.

Liz

Husband (also philistine) cuts the spaghetti before cooking it.

David

Husband (also philistine) cuts the spaghetti before cooking it.

In some parts of the world that’s grounds for divorce.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Evolution of language, Part 2876, now only dependent on who identifies as what.

WTP

Part 2876

Because it's the drinking that's the problem there, not the consequences of the specific situation that's a concern.

David

Evolution of language, Part 2876

Well, indeed. Gay drinking can lead to sticky situations.

SKeating

Because we must remember where we came from:

https://remodernreview.wordpress.com/2020/02/23/feminist-art-activists-the-guerrilla-girls-will-tell-you-what-kind-of-art-you-are-allowed-to-enjoy/

Clam

sticky situations

Band name.

Anon a mouse

"Guerrilla Girls", eh? I think I dated one once...

It was a Saturday Night, and I didn't have nobody...

Anon a mouse

And of course one must use scissors or some other cutting device. How else will one pick said spaghetti crops?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/onthisday/hi/dates/stories/april/1/newsid_2819000/2819261.stm

David

Band name.

I’ve earmarked a suitably draughty and unheated rehearsal room in a rough part of town. I think we should knuckle down to some serious preparation. First things first, we need a policy on hairstyles.

WTP
sticky situations

Band name.

"Guerrilla Girls" - Their first, and unfortunately only album. Another all-girl group, though in this one all the girls actually play instruments. Though the drummer is over dubbed in the studio, unbeknownst to her. Something she discovers on their first promotional tour. Consequently she quits the band and outs them in a TMZ video as a bunch of lesbians. Which everyone knew anyway though resulting in much greater publicity. Enough to make certain industry critics cynically imply that this was all premeditated. The band breaks up at the end of the first tour and the lead singer marries the second baseman for the San Francisco Giants. He then transitions to female because he always felt like a lesbian trapped in a man's body. They move to Oregon and open an organic CDB and marijuana dispensary.

Boatswain's Mate

Gay drinking can lead to sticky situations.

A) ISWYDT

B) Apparently, Tory tea drinking can lead one to lose one's s*** and "Reeeeeeeee!!" all over the tea company's SM coordinator.

Because reasons!

Anon a mouse

suitably draughty and unheated rehearsal room

Hmm. I do feel a bit of a draft in here.

David

Apparently, Tory tea drinking can lead one to lose one’s s*** and “Reeeeeeeee!!” all over the tea company’s SM coordinator.

I’m assuming this will be of slightly less consequence than the last tea-related outrage I can think of.

[ Glares across Atlantic, shakes fist. ]

WTP

First things first, we need a policy on hairstyles

All "High and Tight"? Much simpler that way and think of the cost savings.

I really do need to find a job where my coworkers show up before 10:00 AM. Or not.

Anon a mouse

[ Glares across Atlantic, shakes fist. ]

*feels a... draft*

Heh.

David

Much simpler that way and think of the cost savings.

I’d assumed we’d be destined to blow all of our royalties on high-end hair products.

Cambias

If you cut off the spaghetti then you eventually have a plate full of little spaghetti bits you have to shovel up with a spoon. Grownups twirl.

Boatswain's Mate

I’m assuming this will be of slightly less consequence than the last tea-related outrage I can think of.

[Glares across Atlantic, shakes fist.]

Eh. I'm a strict coffee or Tab man, myself.

Tea, like Coors beer, is like having sex in a canoe, 'cause it's f*cking next to water.

I'll just get my coat. It's a wee bit nippy out.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

All "High and Tight"?

The proper term is "High and Stupid".

I’d assumed we’d be destined to blow all of our royalties on high-end hair products.

Definitely time for a hair band comeback, and these days we could get sweet endorsement money from the hair product people.

Of course that make the assumption that the band members still have sufficient hair, if not there is always the Meguiar's and Turtle Wax endorsements to go for.

David

I’ll just get my coat.

You’ll find it outside in the alley. On fire.

WTP

You mean this Tab?

Grownups twirl....or buy rotini or penne or ...

OK, it's now 10:05. WTF are these people? Did someone make Fat Tuesday a holiday or something?

Boatswain's Mate

You mean this Tab?

Yes. Yes, I do. And I have that advert on speed dial to this day. And it used to be solely because of the bikini-clad beauty walking toward the camera. But now, the utter lack of anything resembling wokeness makes it even that much better.

Steve E

First things first, we need a policy on hairstyles.

Hats! There's nothing a good hat can't hide.

But if you absolutely insist, I suggest this look. For the sake of uniformity...

Farnsworth M Muldoon

If you are after uniformity...

Darleen

[ Glares across Atlantic, shakes fist. ]

David

Heh.

Lancastrian Oik

I’ve earmarked a suitably draughty and unheated rehearsal room in a rough part of town.

You must surely be referring to this place?

(Their homepage is down hence the *ahem* crap link, but I have rehearsed there myself and I can confirm that the building really is a former public convenience in one of the more downmarket districts of The Potteries. Ah, the glamour of rock 'n roll).

David

I can confirm that the building really is a former public convenience

As a stroppy teen, I once rehearsed in a building whose doorways were used as a rain shelter and windbreak by the local prostitutes. I got into the habit of saying “Evening, ladies” and being generally polite, not least because they often outnumbered us.

Lancastrian Oik

...a building whose doorways were used as a rain shelter and windbreak by the local prostitutes.

No prostitutes in this yarn, but in the mid-80s when I was in London for the Bar Finals course, and then later at the beginning of my legal "career", I was in a couple of bands, both of which rehearsed at a studio in a squat very near Clapham Common which consisted of a row of cottages and a few outbuildings- I think they were originally built for railway workers. The studio was in a dank cellar underneath one of the houses, accessed via a trap door and down a very short and steep set of stairs, so carrying amps and drums down there was a perilous task. The "electrics" were a rats' nest of cables and wires with multiple sockets hanging seemingly randomly from the very low ceiling. It was very "alternative", very rock 'n roll and, most importantly, extremely cheap. The custodian was a cheerful old hippie called Theo who was usually stoned and he'd often stand in a corner and jam along on a flute, but when the "electrics" failed, as they frequently did, a lumbering, taciturn, red-bearded and bespectacled giant of a man who wore army surplus shorts all year round would emerge from somewhere, fix the problem and disappear again.

One time, after he'd left, Theo said "That's Thunderclap Newman, that is" and I remember us all glancing at each other and clearly collectively thinking "Yeah, right".

Only years later when he'd died and I read his obituary did I realise that it was true. The big bearded fella was indeed Andrew "Thunderclap" Newman, living in a South London squat despite (or maybe because of) having played on one of the biggest hits of the 60s, twenty years after the band's very short heyday.

Sic transit, etc.

Sam

Never have seen that Tab commercial. My life has been enriched. Much thanks.

[ sees bartender reach for spray bottle, retires to bunk ]

Farnsworth M Muldoon

...I once rehearsed in a building whose doorways were used as a rain shelter and windbreak by the local prostitutes...

...and from whence the hencelesbians were recruited...

ComputerLabRat

Apparently, Tory tea drinking can lead one to lose one's s*** and "Reeeeeeeee!!" all over the tea company's SM coordinator.

SO happy to see they didn't apologize and grovel at the feet of the Twitter mob. Good on them. Maybe more companies will follow their example.

So if this damn Yankee wants to support said tea company by purchasing a tin or two, do I use the Amazon US button above? Or do I need to use the UK one?

I know it won't completely make up for our earlier tea-related outrage [feels the icy glare from across the pond] but it might help smooth the waters somewhat...

David

So if this damn Yankee wants to support said tea company by purchasing a tin or two, do I use the Amazon US button above? Or do I need to use the UK one?

Yorkshire Tea can indeed be bought from both Amazon US and Amazon UK, via the links at the top right of the page.

Hal

I’m assuming this will be of slightly less consequence than the last tea-related outrage I can think of.

[ Glares across Atlantic, shakes fist. ]

Oh, no, no, the consequence is fine, Brexit did already occur . . . .

BrassG

"Yorkshire Tea can indeed be bought from both Amazon US and Amazon UK, via the links at the top right of the page."

But not, apparently, in K-cups.

Yes, yes, I know... heresy, abomination, &c. You there in the back, stop gasping. What can I say? I'm a Yankee and the infernal device has made me lazier. Boil a pot of water? Bother.

I'll just stick with my Twinings K-cups. But I will buy my next couple boxes through your link, if that lessens the pain of learning about my horrifying tea brewing practices.

Boatswain's Mate

SO happy to see they didn't apologize and grovel at the feet of the Twitter mob. Good on them. Maybe more companies will follow their example.

Would that more companies -- ostensibly in business to make profits rather than merely demonstrate their piety like the rabbi of the parable -- have "The Michael Jordan Ethos" etched above every entrance and framed in every office:

"Even Republicans [insert Tories, typical non-leftists in general here] buy shoes."

ComputerlabRat

Yorkshire Tea can indeed be bought from both Amazon US and Amazon UK, via the links at the top right of the page.

HUZZAH! I can support both this fine establishment and Yorkshire Tea with one click. Excellent!

"Even Republicans [insert Tories, typical non-leftists in general here] buy shoes."

This is something many of these companies forget. Or that the majority of the the mob don't purchase their product anyways. They also seem to conflate online outrage presence with purchasing power.

Steve across the Pond

Hi, everybody!

Science!
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-8038783/Shells-20-000-year-old-armadillos-size-Volkswagen-Beetles-Argentina.html

Mardi Gras!
https://www.bizpacreview.com/2020/02/23/hillary-cameo-on-the-epstein-didnt-kill-himself-float-was-the-toast-of-mardi-gras-890276

Humor!
https://oddflex.tumblr.com/post/182871524392

Darleen

Must love green.

Daniel Ream

The big bearded fella was indeed Andrew "Thunderclap" Newman

Every year in high school, we on the roadie crew would inform the incoming ninth graders that the head janitor for the school was in fact Bruce Arnold, former drummer and manager for Helix. Of course they never believed us.

Then once a year, an hour before the opening of the annual high school musical variety show, Bruce would come out in his coveralls and work boots and warm up the drums.

lotocoti

I got into the habit of saying “Evening, ladies” and being generally polite, not least because they often outnumbered us.

Tone is important. I know this because a Midshipman on a run ashore once got the tone wrong. A great deal of running, swearing and shoe hurling ensued.

Pooklord

Must love green

When judging someone else's interior decoration scheme, I may be quite verdant, but it is still hideous.

David

Apparently, the mere existence of birth certificates “actually produces and shapes bodies to develop in a way conformant with understandings of sexual dimorphism.”

Gender Studies, baby. The Australian Feminist Law Journal, to be specific.

Squires

“actually produces and shapes bodies to develop in a way conformant with understandings of sexual dimorphism.”

“Keep away from white medicine!” shouted the witch doctor.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Must love green

That dump belongs here...

WTP
Must love green

When judging someone else's interior decoration scheme, I may be quite verdant, but it is still hideous.

From the Realtor Tip: Professionally designed/decorated when owned by the developer.

WTP

Must love green

Heh. My wife noticed (with an "OMG, OMG, OMG"...for some reason), and it appears to be extremely close to what I recall as well, that the blue flowered couch in one of the pictures featuring the spiral staircase, seems to match exactly the one that was in my mother-in-law's living room. Not sure what to take away from that except that yes, yet again I am waiting on coworkers to show up and I have nothing better to do right now.

sk60

Gender Studies, baby. The Australian Feminist Law Journal, to be specific.

Causality is hard.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

The Australian Feminist Law Journal, to be specific.

Haeckel's Law overturned by a Hawaiian judge.

Meanwhile, for those tired of all the fake meat products...

WTP

So in the spirit of an open thread, presumably there's a hockey fan or two here who already saw this story of the Zamboni driver filling in for the goalie in an NHL hockey game recently...

https://thefederalist.com/2020/02/25/a-zamboni-drivers-moment-in-the-nhl-spotlight-inspires-ordinary-people-to-keep-dreaming/

But was anyone reminded of this commercial with Jason Alexander?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FrQpPD_Ehh4

David

Meanwhile, for those tired of all the fake meat products...

The “fork included” adds a touch of class.

Fred the Fourth

For us ovo lacto porco beefo fisho vegetarians.

David

I was recently made aware of part-time veganism. Specifically, I was told – by someone eating chicken curry - that they’re actually “vegan three days a week.”

Apparently, that’s a thing.

Not entirely unrelated.

Uma Thurmond's Feet

Oddly, I can understand "part-time vegan," while I would never go that far. It may be that they're doing it for reasons other than religion (in this case, worshipping "Gaia," or their moral superiority).

It reminds me of a very funny scene in the "Scott Pilgrim" where the radical vegan is accused of eating chicken parmigiana, and he responded with "chicken is not vegan"?

pst314

[ Glares across Atlantic, shakes fist. ]

Brews pot of coffee.

Hal

Apparently, Tory tea drinking can lead one to lose one's s*** and "Reeeeeeeee!!" all over the tea company's SM coordinator.

Sue, you're shouting at tea.

David

For those who fret about such things, the Greatest Hits has finally been updated.

David

One for our ‘feminists give terrible advice’ file.

Previously, and very much related.

Nikw211

One for our ‘feminists give terrible advice’ file.

What's so radical or new about digging up a 50 year-old argument made by Shulamith Firestone in 1970?

Felicity

I don’t like fruit, so I don’t eat it. I joke that one day I will write a diet book called “Eskimos don’t ear fruit”. Arguably, given my Anglo Irish heritage, that will be cultural appropriation, but the ensuing fuss might lift sales!

David

What’s so radical or new about digging up a 50 year-old argument made by Shulamith Firestone in 1970?

And like Firestone, Ms Lewis seems to be fixated by – captured by - her own personal psychodrama, her own resentments towards her family – or as she puts it, “bio-relatives” - as if this alienation and dysfunction were the norm, the default of all families. The basic dynamic seems to be “I resent my own parents and upbringing so much, even now, that any ludicrously unrealistic scenario would be better and must therefore be imposed.”

Again, psychodrama. A feminist staple.

WTP

'K...so here's something to (kinda) bicker about because yet again, I've got time to kill. Brits and Micks drink tea as a part of their culture for whatever reasons. Americans generally don't (I won't bring up iced tea...ok, just did), which is often attributed to that last big Tea Party we had in Boston ages ago, and to the fact that most of us are in a moderately warmer climate. Hence the ice. But in several trips to Canada, I've never noticed anyone taking a break for tea. Nor in my one trip to Australia did I notice such a thing (maybe I missed it). Do Kiwis? I believe there is some demand for tea in the Caribbean, though my only direct experience there, Commonwealth-ish, was Jamaica.

David

Brits and Micks drink tea as a part of their culture for whatever reasons.

At risk of damaging my hard-won reputation as a snotty Brit, I don’t much care for tea. I don’t mind it, and will drink it if offered, but it’s hard to enthuse about.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

A crisis of song in Michigan, wherein a black music student is upset because...

Since some of y’all don’t believe me [emoji] the instructor was BLACK and sounded uneducated and ignorant with some of the stuff he said all while allowing them to sing about “freedoms” and “segregation” like slavery was a joke.

"Them" being a choir of both PoCs and (gasp) ytes.

Our aggrieved music student continues sniveling about "Wade In The Water"...

So apparently Western Michigan University thinks it’s ok for WHITE peoples to sing negro spirituals while the instructor talking bout “these songs don’t belong to one race”. They sure as hell DO.

On stage, actual musicians (including BLACKS* say, Yeah, get bent, you don't own the music, toots.**

*(not sure if capitalization for race is mandatory these days, just following her lead)
**(may not be actual words used)

WTP

My wife likes it, so I buy a tin of different varieties for Christmas or birthday or whatevs. I can take it or leave it myself. As you say, it never really occurs to me that gee, I could do for a spot of tea right now. Put some Jameson in it and you get my attention, but even that is usually to quiet a sore throat. When we've gone skiing in Europe, I do like Jagertea for a warm-up at lunch. That's about the only thing I like Jagermeister for...well that and maybe in eggnog at Christmas. I do drink iced tea in the summer and when lunching at a restaurant when beer would be inappropriate, I'll have an Arnold Palmer (1/2 iced tea, 1/2 lemonade).

pst314

...I don’t much care for tea.

Stephen Maturin referred to it as "that insipid wash". I like tea, but nearly always prefer coffee. The most frequent exception is when I have a cold or the flu. Restaurant staff prefer coffee to tea because it is far easier to serve: just pour a cup from the carafe rather than having to bring various things to the table.

Adam

If you can be a part-time vegan why can't you be a part-time female, let's say, for purposes of athletic competition?

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Meanwhile, in the Great White North, trouble on the tracks, for which there is already a solution, though the Russians did it (still do) with greater enthusiasm.

David

Meanwhile, in the Great White North, trouble on the tracks,

Looks like Canada has a vermin problem too. Time to put down traps.

Y. Knott

"If you can be a part-time vegan why can't you be a part-time female, let's say, for purposes of athletic competition?"

- Or, as our under-25's use it in Canada, to get cheaper car insurance rates.

"You’ll find it outside in the alley. On fire."

- STOP THAT! Do you not realize how serious the contribution of burning-coat-generated carbon dioxide is to Global Warming? How DARE you?!

Sorry. I'll find my own way out. And, don't set my coat on fire please? - I'm wearing it.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

...why can't you be a part-time female...

You can, unless while adding naughty bits, the doctors remove the others. There is a joke in there about cake and eating it too, but I am not going to touch it.

As a sidebar on the same page, the CDC's Guide to Facial Hair Corona Preventive Grooming. Hitler 'stash AOK, neckbeards hardest hit.

Sam

trouble on the tracks...

It appears these idiots' magical thinking permeates all of their problem solving faculties. They are terrorists who are instead viewed as mere vandals by dint of their sheer incompetence.

David

They are terrorists who are instead viewed as mere vandals by dint of their sheer incompetence.

Once you start trying to set trains on fire, or to derail them - and to happily endanger lives - the word ‘protester’ seems like a wilful and inexcusable euphemism.

Jeff Wood

Too much to hope that a train might take a few out?

Steve E

It appears these idiots' magical thinking permeates all of their problem solving faculties.

This video is up over at Kate's. Sums it up nicely. These "protesters" are no where near being in the majority.

WTP

Hold on, hold on, hold on! This just in, can’t link directly to it regardless of what Ace says there, but apparently Bernie Sanders is a communist. I know. I had to sit down for a minute myself. You know, it’s hard to believe what with all the attention he has garnered over the years and especially as the (sometime) front runner for the D’s waaaay back in 2016. But apparently it’s true! The Washington Post says so! You know, Democracy Dies In Darkness and all that. Gee, if someone like Bernie Sanders could be a communist, it makes one wonder who else could possibly be one? Inquiring minds…

http://ace.mu.nu/archives/386069.php

Squires

They are terrorists who are instead viewed as mere vandals by dint of their sheer incompetence.

They are more likely to blend/ignite themselves than anything else, judging by what is shown.

I particularly enjoyed the individual crab-walking the fuel canister while practically kissing the train, and pouring a line towards the half-assed fire.

Darleen

Ah! Western colonialism, what can't it be blamed for?

David

Ephemera… compiled. Will… appear… after midnight.

[ Slumps across desk, emotionally spent. ]

PiperPaul

T-34/76 turret is coolest turret.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

T-34/76 turret is coolest turret.

Except for the '42-'43 hexagonal turrets, or "Micky Mouse" as the Germans called them.

Layers and layers of editors and fact checkers...don't know if I should fly or take a cruise to Idaho.

Fay

First things first, we need a policy on hairstyles

As long as they conform to the luxuriant array on display here. Those of you who have hung around here long enough will be sure to recognize the lovely Darleen in a stunning purple blouse at the 0.47 mark. Immediately followed by our stylish host, clad in animal print, at the 1.00 mark. The piece de resistance, of course, being the rare cameo appearance of Farnsworth, bow tie and all, who can be seen at the 2.29 mark.

David

our stylish host, clad in animal print

Heh. You’ll pay for that, madam.

Hal

. . . clad in animal print, at the 1.00 mark.

As just one of the examples that have left the nineteen-empties remembered as the nineteen-empties, I never could figure out the point of the costumng fad where one and all were expected to look like an overstuffed vinyl sofa.

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