Friday Ephemeraren’t

Yes, a chance to throw together your own pile of links and oddities in the comments. I’ll set the ball rolling with a film script waiting to happen; some candid bathing scenes; a bold hypothetical; the Vespas of Indonesia; and captured for posterity, grace in victory. 

Oh, and how to fight geese, an illustrated guide. 

Comments

[BlogDog]

Maybe Éduoard Phillipe could shout “I am invincible!” https://youtu.be/fXW02XmBGQw

[Assistant Village Idiot]

I'd like to see the geese's version of that last one.

[Steve E]

What would Jesus do?

[Daniel Ream]

how to fight geese, an illustrated guide

Real geese are dangerous. Here in Canada, you're not allowed to so much as touch one since they're a protected species. I think that's more for our benefit than theirs; they can do serious damage if so inclined.

The swans in Stratford, Ontario have been getting so aggressive that the tourism office is warning people off of feeding them; a mature swan can beat a man to death with its wings.

[Hal]

Gary Larsen is back

[Hal]

The People Speak, once given a little clarifying inspiration . . .

[Jen]

'A concise list of things that are racist'.

http://ace.mu.nu/archives/389100.php

[David]

Morning, all.

Thread.

In short, it does matter, quite a bit, who gets to educate your children.

[David]

Tomb tour of note.

[sH2]

a bold hypothetical;

As if anyone in Hollywood would have the nerve.

[Hal]

An online business meeting of note.

The vicar-general, or company secretary, noted that this was a “somewhat modernised version” of a ceremony that had been conducted in Latin until 1733.
. . .
Then the rest of the gathering appeared in a multiscreen layout: seven bishops, or regional sales managers, in their magenta uniforms and a few flunkeys to give reports.

[Hal]

Further commentary from The Times:

Welcoming his new fellow primate in York, the Archbishop of Canterbury said that he was “deeply intimidated” by Stephen Cottrell’s talent for speaking. This is a good thing. As Justin Welby explained: “The definition of an archbishop is someone who can speak while working out what he has to say.”

Further commentary from . . . .

“Gentlemen! Gentlemen!” The Patrician raised his hands in a conciliatory fashion. “It seems to me,” he went on, taking advantage of the brief pause, “that what we have here is a strictly magical phenomenon. I would like to hear from our learned friend on this point. Hmm?”

Someone nudged the Archchancellor of Unseen University, who had nodded off.

“Eh? What?” said the wizard, startled into wakefulness.

“We were wondering,” said the Patrician loudly, “what you were intending to do about this dragon of yours?”

The Archchancellor was old, but a lifetime of survival in the world of competitive wizardry and the byzantine politics of Unseen University meant that he could whip up a defensive argument in a split second. You didn’t remain Archchancellor for long if you let that sort of ingenuous remark whizz past your ear.

“My dragon?” he said.

“It’s well known that the great dragons are extinct,” said the Patrician brusquely. “And, besides, their natural habitat was definitely rural. So it seems to me that this one must be mag—”

“With respect, Lord Vetinari,” said the Archchancellor, “it has often been claimed that dragons are extinct, but the current evidence, if I may make so bold, tends to cast a certain doubt on the theory. As to habitat, what we are seeing here is simply a change of behavior pattern, occasioned by the spread of urban areas into the countryside which has led many hitherto rural creatures to adopt, nay in many cases to positively embrace, a more municipal mode of existence, and many of them thrive on the new opportunities thereby opened to them. For example, foxes are always knocking over my dustbins.”

He beamed. He’d managed to get all the way through it without actually needing to engage his brain.

---Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!

[David]

‘A concise list of things that are racist’.

As noted recently, the displacement has veered past the merely implausible and into the surreal. And to the extent that some people have an unflattering perception of black people in aggregate, this seems less the result of traffic lights, innocuous syrup logos, or old episodes of The Golden Girls, and more to do with how a significant number of black people actually behave.

I mean, if the female Amazon driver seen in the videos linked above - the one staring in disbelief at the feral dynamic and then being robbed and gratuitously assaulted – if at some point in the future she were to feel some hesitation when delivering to the same neighbourhood, or one like it, I doubt that syrup logos will be foremost in her mind.

[David]

Attention, parents. A role model for teenagers who are gay.

[Mike]

A role model for teenagers who are gay.

F*cking hell.

[David]

F*cking hell.

For those of us who recall a world of Larry Grayson, Mr Humphries, and endless lisping nancies, this does not look much like progress. But apparently, being a gay teenager means you should identify with lurid, cartoonish cross-dressers. It’s like The Black & White Minstrel Show, but for gay kids.

And oh yes, your license fee at work.

[Jonathan]

In these fraught times a necessary Corrective to some of the insane, anti-scientific nonsense flying around.

[Jonathan]

A role model for teenagers who are gay.

A great Thread on why Drag Queens are being forced into children's lives.

(both via Colin Wright)

[David]

a necessary corrective to some of the insane, anti-scientific nonsense flying around.

That.

[Baceseras]

Baceseras 2020: What, you want some of my juice?

https://mobile.twitter.com/KassyDillon/status/1281417336818290688

[JuliaM]

Someone’s getting fired....

http://twitter.com/MayorBrodeur/status/1280910300448018433

[WTP]

Notdivulgingmtlastnamenotthatitsthatbigofadeal 2020: Up, up!

[Sam Duncan]

“Real geese are dangerous.”

Ballantine's distillery outside Dumbarton uses a flock as guards. Or did. Apparently they were “retired” in 2012. And a little more fun bled out of the world.

“A great Thread on why Drag Queens are being forced into children's lives.”

“Sexualizing children's spaces is therefore a "logical" consequence of queering both spaces and childhood in order to "liberate the potentialities" of children's identities, and it requires the disruption of childhood innocence.”

That is almost exactly the argument put by the Paedophile Information Exchange back in the '70s: the sexualization of children represented their “liberation”. God help us.

[Sam]

Gary Larsen is back

Thank you, Hal. Seriously that's a much needed development and you bringing it to my attention is appreciated.

[Adam]

According to the USArmy you might be a white supremacist if you never owned slaves* or believe there is one human race*.

Also, denying that you are a racist marks you out as one.*

* Applies only to ypipo

[David]

Meanwhile, in woke academia.

[Governor Squid]

Squid 2020: You lazy bastard!

[Governor Squid]

The Church has found a way to get people interested in scripture in the 21st Century:

"Sorry, we've acquired a friend this morning."

[Darleen]

Oops ... sorry, David, you can delete my comment above. I didn't finish reading the whole thread before tossing my link.

[David]

Done.

[Jonathan]

Philippe Lemoine has a great, and quite angry, Thread on the same subject.

[Matthew May]

@ Sam Duncan
If Ballantine's distillery outside Dumbarton really does use Drag Queens as guards I salute them. There is a remake of "Charlie's Angels" right there.

[Sam]

RE the tranny thing...

You cannot reason with someone who argues, in essence, that transatlantic flights are extremely important because continents don't actually exist. We here seem to suffer from internalized reciprocity and these zombies aren't f*cking around anymore. Behave accordingly.

[Hal]

Gary Larsen is back

Thank you, Hal.

Yer welcome!---One should have a peer at everything a good deal, being monofocused is for insects.

I don't ever watch the news, I can read far faster than some git can recite from a teleprompter, and even in that I just skim headlines, usually, and generally keep going that way all around . . .

[Sam]

Sam 2020: You don't exist

[Jonathan]

My comment at 16:37 no longer makes sense, but it's a great thread anyway, regarding This piece of cowardice.

[David]

regarding this piece of cowardice.

And cowardice is often functionally indistinguishable from corruption.

[Jonathan]

And cowardice is often functionally indistinguishable from corruption

It certainly bears more than a passing resemblance to a protection racket.

[Uma Thurmond's Feet]

Tomb tour of note.

If the family doesn't see me for the rest of the day, they'll know who to blame. Effin' fascinatin'.

[Squires]

...on why Drag Queens are being forced into children's lives.

Short version: The enwokened see something they do not control and have an urge to destroy it, as not being under their control it does not flatter what they see in their reflection. Their way of destroying it is to hollow it out until it echoes their minds.

[Hal]

. . .how to fight geese, an illustrated guide.

A chunky desperado confronts you with larcenous intent..

[Governor Squid]

Is it odd that I tried to control the man in the goose-fighting video as though it were a classic Flash game?

[David]

on why Drag Queens are being forced into children’s lives.

Insofar as drag queens are funny, or meant to be funny, to adults, it’s because they’re lurid and grotesque. That a grotesquely cartoonish figure – a male parody of a woman - has become a go-to shorthand aimed at gay youngsters, supposedly to make them feel good, feel normal, is… a little odd.

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

Muldoon 2020 - Shut The Fuck Up !

[Hal]

Insofar as drag queens are funny, or meant to be funny, to adults, it’s because they’re lurid and grotesque.

Oh, no they're not.

Oh, yes they are.

Oh, no they're not.

And then there is the matter of moving in a figure eight . . . .---It's not Youtube, so you'll have to manually go to 4:41 . . . .

. . . . a go-to shorthand aimed at gay youngsters . . .

And if one is not doing theatre, oh, demanding that a taxi driver brush up on stir fry techniques somewhat comes to mind . . . . . .

[NateWhilk]

From reddit, group r/BlockedAndReported" (for discussing a podcast by that name, from leftists who recognize some of the insanity): "2020 cancel culture absolutely called by the Freak Brothers in 1973"

https://old.reddit.com/r/BlockedAndReported/comments/hk2lop/2020_cancel_culture_absolutely_called_by_the/

[Chester Draws]

Draws 2020 do you want in or do you want out?

It's better than some real ones lately too.

[Craig Mc]

If the Church of England names a black person as primate, will that be more or less racist?

[Hal]

Victory! U.S. defeats CHOP, ending 75-year losing streak

[Mags]

Insofar as drag queens are funny, or meant to be funny, to adults, it’s because they’re lurid and grotesque. That a grotesquely cartoonish figure – a male parody of a woman - has become a go-to shorthand aimed at gay youngsters, supposedly to make them feel good, feel normal, is… a little odd.

That.

[JML]

JML 2020 why don't you go to work and I'll sleep on the couch all day?

[David]

Heh. Quite.

[Tom]

Muldoon 2020 - Shut The Fuck Up !

You've got my vote.

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

Right, the Black LLano of Manchester they shall be then.

[Ted S, Catskill Mtns, NY, USA]

“Sexualizing children's spaces is therefore a "logical" consequence of queering both spaces and childhood in order to "liberate the potentialities" of children's identities, and it requires the disruption of childhood innocence.”

The Catholic Church sexualized children's spaces, and look where it got them.

[asiaseen]

@ Farnsworth M Muldoon
Maybe the Grey Cliffs of Dover as a compromise?

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

Maybe the Grey Cliffs of Dover as a compromise?

Compromise is a patriarchal tool of western capitalist oppression, a true ally or black-adjacent ally would never compromise, tovarisch.

In The Glorious World of Next Tuesday when all the old history is erased everything must be as opposite as possible to erase the stain of wypipo, Black Llano of Manchester - BLM - it is obvious.

Besides, I couldn't think of a word for "plain", which in an oppressive western geometrical construct is the perpendicular opposite of a cliff, other than llano which, being Spanish, also pays homage to our Latinx allies.

[NateWhilk]

Maybe the Grey Cliffs of Dover as a compromise?

The Chalk (or chalk) Cliffs of Dover. Sigh (signifying giving up).

[asiaseen]

@Farnsworth M Muldoon

Compromise is a patriarchal tool

In a spirit of self criticism I confess that I had ignorantly and wilfully refused to acknowledge that the use of the word "cliffs" is itself an indicator of positional male superiority. Peccavi (unless that is not allowed as a token of privileged educational achievement)

[Squires]

Not-of-Color Dales-of-Dover.

[pst314]

The Irredeemably Evil Cliffs of Dover

[WTP]

OK, let me try this again without being so anal as to kill the joke:

WTP 2020 : What the hell are YOU staring at?

[pst314]

You talkin to me? You talkin to me?
--Taxi Driver

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

Not-of-Color Dales-of-Dover.

The problem is "Dover" itself problematic, because there are places in England without cliffs, so they are marginalized, plus "Dover" comes from the Latin name of the river, and we know how they were with slaves.

Of course if you really want problematic English features, it is high time the Rude Man of Cerne was cancelled.

[Daniel Ream]

Taxi Driver

While playing LEGO Marvel Avengers, of all things, I was treated to comic references to both Doctor Strangelove and Taxi Driver. I find myself wondering who they think is playing these games.

[STG]

This talk is well worth the time.

The Truth About Critical Methods | James Lindsay
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rSHL-rSMIro

It lays out the motivations and goals behind Critical Theory, and cuts through a lot of obfuscation. It clarified a lot of things for me.

[JuliaM]

Daniel Ream: ’ I find myself wondering who they think is playing these games.’

Definitely not just kids - most of the Lego games have something for all ages. I love them.

[Sam Duncan]

Always respect the media.

“I find myself wondering who they think is playing these games.”

You, clearly. :)

In all seriousness, Traveller's Tales, which develops the LEGO games, was founded by a bunch of people who cut their teeth developing demos and games in the '80s. I think they know their stuff is for people like them as much as the kids of today.

[WTP]

Always respect the media.

So I see another story on that link entitled "Maryland governor blasts Pelosi over statue toppling comments". Click on the story...here's the milquetoast Republican governor's "blast":

"It’s disappointing that Speaker Pelosi has lost touch with the Baltimore community that her family served,” Hogan wrote on Twitter.

Seriously. Oh, my virgin ears. "Disappointing". "That her family served". Her father was in bed with the mafia. That's the "Baltimore community" her family served. I actually despise these weak Republicans, and their "conservative media" cheerleaders, more than the Dems.

[Ted S, Catskill Mtns, NY, USA]

This can't be real, can it?

[Darleen]

Possible escalation of iconoclasm.

[Daniel Ream]

most of the Lego games have something for all ages

True, but the usual motivation is to provide the parents with something to chuckle at while playing games with their kids. From the very first TT Lego game, the interstitial video clips have been silent comic shorts. This is the first one I've seen that references specific pop culture, and it's reference points that I can't see anyone exposed to the game even getting, unless you assume grandma and grandpa are in the room while the grandkids are playing. I'm pushing 50[1] and none of my friends with kids would recognize these movies.

[1] Which is why I play them. I haven't the reflexes to play anything that doesn't have an Easy Mode any more

[Squires]

cultural genocide!
cultural appropriation!
colonialism!
imperialism!
crickets chirping

https://legalinsurrection.com/2020/07/turkeys-erdogan-signs-decree-turning-hagia-sophia-into-a-mosque/

[Sam Duncan]

“crickets chirping”

Yeah, funny how you never hear about the “occupied territories” in Constantinople, isn't it? Sure, the Turks have been there for a hell of a long time, but when exactly does the statute of limitations run out on these things?

[Alex DeWynter]

DeWynter 2020 Get in your crate NOW

[Squires]

Chutzpah:

https://legalinsurrection.com/2020/07/erdogan-rebukes-west-for-islamophobia-amid-criticism-over-turning-hagia-sophia-into-mosque/

[Hal]

Those annoying difficulties of choosing adulthood and style instead of cargo cult costuming . . . .

[Hal]

crickets chirping

Welllllll, no.

The Turkish conservatives are indeed quite pissed off about the museum getting taken over, because Erdogan is pandering to the right wing rather than being a conservative leader of conservatives.

Outside of Turkey, rather a lot of other conservatives are also pointing out that the loss of a museum is a bad thing.

And, in turn, while opposing right wing factions are indeed complaining loudly, the only reason they are complaining is because of having to watch a rival right wing faction get to use Hagia Sophia as a typical right wing mosque and right wing propaganda puff piece.

---As usual, when playing Dungeons and Deacons, the only permissible D&D ruleset is one's own, all other rulesets are never to be acknowledged.

But, geographically, politically, and generally speaking, that is merely what is going on this week. Whether this week, next week, the following week, no amount of handwaving is going to make reality go away:

Formerly, Hagia Sophia was some variety of Christian cathedral for about 916 years, then was a mosque for 482 years.

Most importantly, for the last 85 years, Hagia Sophia has been a museum, and Erdogan has no way around that.

Like Vladimir Putin in Russia, Erdogan is a strongman ruler who has to win an election every four years. Putin is perennially popular in Russia and wins easily, but Erdogan usually scrapes through with just over half the vote. The country is divided down the middle, and the other half loathes him and his Islamist policies. . . . . He used to be a fairly competent strategist, but he has been in power too long (17 years) and he has finally lost the plot. This is megalomania.

Soo, while not quite next week, at some point in the near future, a very safe expectation is that Hagia Sophia will indeed return to its now established primary purpose of the last 85 years, that of being a museum.

[Jonathan]

Yeah, funny how you never hear about the “occupied territories” in Constantinople, isn't it?

Let's de-colonise Istanbul and make it Constantinople again.

[Farnsworth M Muldoon]

Let's de-colonise Istanbul and make it Constantinople again.

[Squires]

Hal, as usual, being both voluminous and dense.

[Hal]

Hal, as usual, being both voluminous and dense.

Yes, html linking does allow one to hand off what's practically a fractal variety of shorthand.

As needed by whichever reader, that reader can thus do whatever amount of informational unfolding . . . .

[Daniel Ream]

Soo, while not quite next week, at some point in the near future

...all vestiges of Orthodox Christianity will be removed from the site. With explosives, if necessary.

[Hal]

Pub landlord installs electric fence around bar

[FlynPigRanch]

FlynPigRanch 2020 Moo! Baa! Oink!