Friday Ephemera
How Dare You Not Pretend

Comments

pst314

Anyway, they got that cow. Or so they said.

The cow survived, escaped to America, and got a job at Harry Caray's restaurant in Chicago.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Remember the truck crash and the lab monkeys that escaped?

Fallon [a witness] was contacted Saturday by the CDC and was told to monitor herself for any cold-like symptoms.

She shared the letter from the CDC with Newswatch 16; it reads in part that, “the surviving monkeys will be quarantined and will be monitored for infectious diseases for at least 31 days before their release.”

Out: China Corona.
In: Pennsylvania Primate Pox

pst314

In: Pennsylvania Primate Pox

Send in Bruce Willis!

pst314

Your dragon name is...

ComputerLabRat

It’s totally reinvented the “can’t be arsed to cook” lifestyle scenario.

Yes!! I've seen them in grocery stores over here, and they serve the exact same purpose. I've noticed a few new, more "upmarket" versions of ramen and cup/pot noodle popping up in stores.

David

I’ve seen them in grocery stores over here,

They’re actually not that bad, as dehydrated-things-in-pots go. Quite spicy. And you can mainline MSG while still looking down on the peasants who make do with a Pot Noodle. Win-win.

#ClassyLifestyleTips

Daniel Ream

#ClassyLifestyleTips

In university there was an irregular column in the student newspaper on recipes for poor students; my favorite was an asian tuna noodle salad that used the various components of a 25 cent pack of Mr. Noodles (you make the dressing with the flavour packet and use leftover soy sauce packets from the Chinese takeaway). Per serving, less than a dollar.

Nunya Bidness

The US and NATO are sending forces to confront the fearsome Russian Bear at the Ukraine border.

They might do well to reflect that the real Russian threat is the mole.

Buck Fiden

"explain Limburger and Onion sandwiches"

They are being issued with Trigger Warnings, effective Feb 1, or 1 Feb.

My understanding of this combo is that the taste of the Limburger covers up the taste of the onion, and the smell of onion hides the Limburger pong.

Anyway, they are not meant for eating but for serving to others.

Sam

Per serving, less than a dollar.

Confucius say: you get what you pay for.

ccscientist

ramen: when we dropped our daughter at college 15 yrs ago, we saw a student pulling a luggage cart (flat bed, 4x6 ft, wheels) stacked with crates of ramen. I can understand the motivation, but that is how you get nutrient deficiencies. No protein or vitamins at all.

Jack Klompus

Last year I was exchanging emails with a teacher recruiter in the UK. The chat veered off into politics and he referred to Corbyn as a "real cheese and pickle sandwich eater." I hadn't heard that expression here in the States but it didn't strike me as flattering, similar to "ham and egger."

WTP

I’ve seen them in grocery stores over here,

Wife just got back from grocery store, I had an MRI so I didn't go this week...and BTW, how some of you people have gone since March 2020 without touching your face...well y'all are heroes in my book...but I digress...and she tells me there has been a rather dramatic drop in items available since we were last in there three weeks ago. And of course a significant increase in prices. And thus no idea if those noodles are generally available here.

sonny wayz

"In the 1970s chicken was still a luxury meat"

'Mock chicken' used to be made with veal.

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/mock%20chicken

Times do change, don't they?

WTP

we saw a student pulling a luggage cart (flat bed, 4x6 ft, wheels) stacked with crates of ramen. I can understand the motivation, but that is how you get nutrient deficiencies. No protein or vitamins at all.

Female? Soy boy? Most likely just attention seeking. But then again...

Wife adds "not one stalk of celery in the whole store". This is somewhat significant here in Duda world where the local high school football team was once known as the Celery Stalkers.

sonny wayz

@Burnsie

"Neil Young, MD, PhD in Virology and Immunology..."

Yeah, Young seems to be determined to be a prat. Then I remember he wrote this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zm-YTu0qbLA

Steve E

Neil Young, MD, PhD in Virology and Immunology, weighs in on Joe Rogan:

Neil Young is more like "the Man" than "the Man" ever was.

Sam

Who is Neil Young?

Daniel Ream

but that is how you get nutrient deficiencies. No protein or vitamins at all

The dorm mate of one of my friends got scurvy from eating nothing but Kraft Dinner for months.

As an aside, it amuses me that you lot call it "macaroni and cheese" while we try to pass it off as "dinner".

Steve E

while still looking down on the peasants who make do with a Pot Noodle. Win-win.

Where I live there are at least a dozen restaurants charging a minimum of 16-mighty-canuck-bucks for a bowl of noodles. Apparently the cost is all in the broth, pork bone don't you know. One of the items available with your noodles is pork intestine but I'm pretty sure it's inverted pork rectums.

WTP

As an aside, it amuses me that you lot call it "macaroni and cheese" while we try to pass it off as "dinner".

Hey, with those "Dinners", a little imagination, and whatever leftover and on the edge of expiration ingredients I could find in my fridge back in the day, I could kick going to the grocery store down the road for three or four days. Ah, but I was much craftier back then. And had my intestinal tract trained for indestructibility by a diet heavy on one-with-everything pizza and Chernobyl Chicken Wings. Good times, good times.

pst314

The dorm mate of one of my friends got scurvy from eating nothing but Kraft Dinner for months.

He forgot to always pair it with a generous serving of green vegetables. I recommend spinach. (I yam what I yam.)

But why not make stove-top mac and cheese from scratch? Cheaper than Kraft and just as quick: Boil the noodles, drain, turn down the heat, put a few slices of cheddar on top of the noodles, cover and wait to melt.

pst314

Who is Neil Young?

The sixties rock musician. Very...progressive.

David

but I’m pretty sure it’s inverted pork rectums.

What? Oh come on. I’m only human.

pst314

'Mock chicken' used to be made with veal.

My grade school cafeteria served mock chicken legs on occasion--chopped veal breaded and deep fried or baked. The upper class kids affected to loathe them but I remember them as being tasty enough. Similarly, the giant pans of pizza made with ground beef and government surplus cheese (blended cheddar and colby, I think) were definitely not proper Italian pizza but were nonetheless tasty.

pst314

he referred to Corbyn as a "real cheese and pickle sandwich eater."

I'd love to hear the true meaning and origin of that expression. Wikipedia was not much help, unless the mention of "ploughman's sandwich/lunch" suggests that Corbyn is being denigrated as too common, not a member of the upper class--but that's just wild speculation from 4000 miles away.

ccscientist

mac and cheese: I prefer it the way pst314 suggests. I find the store cheese sauce (as in packaged Mac-n-cheese) to be odd tasting, so I just sprinkle shredded cheese on top and put the lid back on to melt. More cheesy.
"In the 1970s chicken was still a luxury meat" In the 70s I was in college in the US South and chicken was NOT a luxury meat. It was cheaper than beef and much less than fish. Perhaps because industrial chicken houses had been built all over at that time.
Food snobbery is so funny. When Trump was pres and invited some football team that won something to the white house (I wasn't really paying attention, ok?), he piled the fast food burgers high for them. I thought it was perfect and the team loved it but the media snobs lost their minds. hahahaha

pst314

Food snobbery is so funny. When Trump was pres...

Remember the news media bashing Reagan's fondness for mac and cheese?

Daniel Ream

I just sprinkle shredded cheese on top

Philistines! Proper macaroni and cheese is made with a white cheddar sauce, topped with bread crumbs and baked.

[ tosses head, flounces out of kitchen ]

Steve E

"real cheese and pickle sandwich eater."

Add ham, roast pork shoulder and mustard and you've got a cuban sandwich. Yum!

PiperPaul

I'm pretty sure it's inverted pork rectums

Well, who's to say with authority where pork rectums actually end and pork intestines begin, anyway?

Steve E

where pork rectums actually end

Rectum, damn near killed him!

[ Random punch line ]

pst314

Feminists say the quiet part out loud.

The real meaning of all this ideological jargon is "kill all the normal people".

Pooklord

No mental illness on display here:
https://twitter.com/VishBurra/status/1485292670939500546

Also, DC is "their" territory, apparently.

Sam

Also, DC is "their" territory, apparently.

It is though.

Well, who's to say with authority where pork rectums actually end and pork intestines begin, anyway?

Life is a flat circle.

sonny wayz

"Proper macaroni and cheese is made with a white cheddar sauce, topped with bread crumbs and baked."

Perfect, except you misspelled 'Fontina'.

ComputerLabRat

Feminists say the quiet part out loud.

From that link: "You inspire me to abolish gender"

What are these feminists on about? The only thing being abolished is biological sex. Hell - gender is the only thing today, and all those gender stereotypes that feminists used to hate on back in the day - e.g. long hair, makeup, skirts, playing with dollies, etc - they're back and rigidly enforced. If a man has/does any of those things it automagically makes him a woman! And tomboys who like sports and trucks and non-girlie stuff - well, that automagically makes them men! I always thought the modern feminists were rather silly for banging on about The Patriarchy - but when a Patriarchy actually showed up, in the form of hardcore trans activists, they bent over so fast in acquiescence it made your head spin. Granted, the few who haven't are now TERFS and canceled.

If there's no such thing as women anymore, what's the point of feminism?

a different james

In the 70s I was in college in the US South and chicken was NOT a luxury meat.

It was on the eastern side of the pond.

Every Sunday, roast chicken dinner to feed 6.

And we were not poor.

Scot

There are a couple steps missing from the ham sandwich recipe. First, fry the ham in butter. Put the ham on a slice of bread. With the other slice, wipe off any butter left in the pan.

Scot

Re the screaming mothers: Forty years ago, we called it the Two Minutes Hate.

Steve E

Every Sunday, roast chicken dinner to feed 6.

That was my childhood too. Chickens were also mostly sold whole and there was a significant difference between a roaster and a fryer. There weren't a lot of chicken parts available. You could buy a half chicken or a quarter chicken but most of the parts that were available were offal like giblets and livers and you could also buy necks and wings some times. But you didn't often buy a package of thighs or a package of breasts and when you did they were way more expensive per pound than the whole chicken.

ccscientist

different james: in the late 60s early 70s, the agriculture extension agents in the South (Georgia anyway) advised farmers that the best thing would be to build a big chicken house. Of course too many did exactly that and prices tumbled. "we are here to help" but no help for the bankrupt farmers.

Steve E

Perfect, except you misspelled 'Fontina'.

That. Yum!

Fontina melts beautifully, gruyere is another good one. Cheddar not so much.

WTP

But why not make stove-top mac and cheese from scratch? Cheaper than Kraft and just as quick

Sure, sure. And we can make Eucharists from gluten free grains. Or light the Olympic torch with a 19 cent Bic lighter. And while we're at it, why don't we substitute a position player, as "designated hitter" if you will, for the pitcher every 9 batters. Sure. Next thing you know they'll be letting people play tennis in any color clothes. Left-handed short stops and polo players will be next. Dogs and cats sleeping together...

David

That was my childhood too.

[ Fetches pipe, rocking chair. ]

Steve E

[ Fetches pipe, rocking chair. ]

I'll raise Norman Rockwell from the dead to paint the portrait

Fred the Fourth

pst314,
Must be some other cow. Dad and his brother were using 50 cal; some of those holes look like 20 mm damage.
I always thought cows looked suspiciously like some alien lifeform. I think it's the way they stare at you if they think you are in their way. Like they have infinite patience.

pst314

It was on the eastern side of the pond.
Every Sunday, roast chicken dinner to feed 6.
And we were not poor.

Yes. I remember various Brits' descriptions of the situation before Thatcher. Also remarks by sf writer Michael Z Williamson who was born in Birkenhead.

pst314

Cheddar not so much.

Cheddar and Colby for the best-tasting mac and cheese. Cardinal Fang is here to remind you all that dissent is not allowed.

PiperPaul

Why would chicken be a luxury food? I'd think they are the easiest animal to raise and keep (well, compared to cattle, pigs, sheep and whatever animal Spam is made out of).

Pooklord

I think in the US in the 70's, Roast Beef with yorkshire pudding on Sunday dinner was the 'high-end' of the dining scale (for my family, anyway) and roast chicken was more of a regular, not-too-special, but still delicious weeknight meal.

Baceseras

It’s totally reinvented the “can’t be arsed to cook” lifestyle scenario

Everybody Loves Ramen

a "real cheese and pickle sandwich eater."
#ClassyLifestyleTips

Toast, salted butter, dill pickle chips, Kraft slices: pop under broiler. Less than two minutes later: Mmm. Devour. Repeat.

Who is Neil Young?

    Look at Mother Nature, on the run
    In the nineteen-seventies

The nineteen-seventies, when Mother Nature was down to Her last gasp, as previously in the nineteen-sixties, and again in the eighties, nineties, oughties, when not? See, we keep not doing what these Mother's Little Helpers say we have to do for Her sake, and She keeps on keeping on, bless Her terraqueous hide.

Your Dragon name

Tocs the Blithe, Hoarder of Braunschweiger and Extension Cords

Pooklord

Your Dragon Name

Drolkoop the Sanguine, Hoarder of Sesame Chicken And Clickers.

pst314

Roast Beef with yorkshire pudding

Yum!

pst314

Why would chicken be a luxury food?

I think (?) because they were still being raised mostly in sort of the old barnyard ways. The "industrial" methods had not yet been developed or were in their infancy. If my extremely vague memories are correct, then prices back then would be a clue as to what totally free-range organic chickens ought to cost today.

pst314

Your Dragon Name

413tsp the Sleepy, Hoarder of Spam and Clipboards.

pst314

I'll raise Norman Rockwell from the dead to paint the portrait

I'll chip in for the candles.

a different james

Why would chicken be a luxury food?

see table in article below.

Bacon, minced beef, sausages and chicken. Today's prices relative to adjusted equivalent 1988 prices. All are relatively cheaper today but chicken by the greatest margin.

Also striking that white fish is actually more expensive in real terms- collapse of the cod fisheries, I presume.

https://www.which.co.uk/news/2019/11/heres-how-our-food-prices-compare-to-30-years-ago-and-you-might-be-surprised/

pst314

Also striking that white fish is actually more expensive in real terms- collapse of the cod fisheries, I presume.

Similar with regard to other types of fish, I suspect. In the sixties the prices of various Great Lakes fish were lower than today, or so I recall.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

I think it's the way they stare at you if they think you are in their way. Like they have infinite patience.

You are confusing that with the look of a beast dumber than a creosote post without the creosote.

Toast, salted butter, dill pickle chips, Kraft slices: pop under broiler. Less than two minutes later: Mmm. Devour. Repeat.

You know, all around the world people make mock of Southern cooking and the relative healthiness (or lack thereof) of it, but one thing we can say, especially compared to some of the stuff hocked here (see above), it is all edible.

pst314

You are confusing that with the look of a beast dumber than a creosote post without the creosote.

Your eloquence does not leave much room to describe sheep.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Your eloquence does not leave much room to describe sheep.

Ovine; res ipsa loquitur.

pst314

You know, all around the world people make mock of Southern cooking

The freshest brook trout I ever had was at a small restaurant in North Carolina. The best baked ham I ever had was at Boone Tavern in Berea KY. Also where I discovered spoon bread, yum. Unfortunately, their menu seems to become less Southern and more "cosmopolitan" in recent years, and spoon bread is not even on the menu.

WTP

a small restaurant in North Carolina.

Somewhat my (other) neck of the woods. Grated it's big state but trout implies mountains...somewhat...where abouts? I love good trout. There's a place in North Georgia called The Flying Trout that was second best to a place we went decades ago somewhere around Maggie Valley called The Pointe of View.

Baceseras

one thing we can say

That's What I like about the South

pst314

Somewhat my (other) neck of the woods. Grated it's big state but trout implies mountains...somewhat...where abouts?

Somewhere between Asheville and Cullowhee? Regular family visits all through my childhood, but that is now over 40 years ago; no more relatives in the area. :-( Beautiful, beautiful country.

pst314

Boone Tavern is not the only restaurant that has compromised its original ethnic focus, but it's a particularly unfortunate case because the parent Berea College exists in part to study and preserve Southern culture.

pst314

Boone Tavern recipes. Hats off to all who study and preserve the old ways.

pst314

Still hoping someone can explain the precise meaning and derivation of "he's a real cheese and pickle sandwich".

Squires

Behold Cire the Cold, Horder of Italian Wraps and Torpedo Heaters!

Asheville

Gone down the shitter, I'm afraid, from all that I've heard.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Laurie Penny has deep thoughts about pronouns.

pst314

Gone down the shitter, I'm afraid, from all that I've heard.

:-(

pst314

San Francisco crap artists need subsidies!

From the link:

"According to a 2017 Arts & Economic Prosperity report by the San Francisco Arts Commission, the nonprofit arts and culture sector generates $1.45 billion in total economic activity, supports 39,699 full-time jobs, and generates $1 billion in household income to local residents."

I wonder what dishonest techniques were used to concoct those economic numbers. After all, if those "artists" are generating so much economic activity then why do virtually none of the dollars end up in their pockets?
Also: Remember all those "studies" that "prove" that cities will profit enormously by building sports stadiums that highly profitable privately owned teams claim to be unable to afford to build themselves?

Fay

Pretty sure "Sandwich Spread" was basically a Miracle Whip type sauce infused with chopped picked cucumbers. Don't ever remember it having cabbage in it. It was yummy. And Branston pickle is too. Especially on cheese sandwiches!

Wasn't it Shipphams who had those dinky barrel-shaped little bottles for various pastes? Can't remember if it was that make or not but I remember barrel shaped bottles of meat and fish paste. My aunt used to give us that crap spread on bread that had been toasted on one side. Toasting both sides was an extravagance and waste of the leccy. For those of you of a certain age who were not raised in the UK, toast was made in a "grill pan" under the broiler on top of the stove (not in a toaster).

My aunt was married to a professional & well paid man but she served the crappiest food. I was more than happy to eat at home where my widowed, not very well off mother, made us sandwiches of buttered white bread sprinkled with sugar. If she had an extra couple of bob we'd have a few gratings of Cadbury's milk chocolate on top of the sugar.

White privilege don't you know.

John

Speaking as a diabetic some proper hard cheese, cut to order from a block in a decent deli, together with Branson on freshly baked crusty bread (generously buttered) is a real culinary treat. Less is more.

David

Laurie Penny has deep thoughts about pronouns.

I think we’ll give that one a post of its own.

Comments that-a-way.

WTP

Beating the “who is Neil Young” dead horse…

The sixties was a long time ago so my memory may be inaccurate, but as I recall Neil Young was always a hippie fool whose sympathies were with commies.

Akshullly….back around 1983 or so Neil said some rather positive things about Ronald Reagan. He had recently put out a song that got some traction “Proud to Be a Union Man” that mocked the mentality of workers unions of the day. I distinctly remember an interview, most likely in Musician magazine where the leftist interviewer, like all good leftist cultural tools, pressed him on it and he backtracked so quickly it was embarrassing. I do think Neil tried to think for himself but he was too naive to realize the consequences for that in pop culture. It was one of my earliest indications that there was some sort of cultural ideology that even the supposedly “independent” rich and famous were afraid to cross.

pst314

Toasting both sides was an extravagance and waste of the leccy.

Leccy. Thank you for that; I love to learn new vocabulary.

Waste. I recently read a biography of Terry Pratchett which describes just how poor they and many other Brits were in the immediate post-war years.

pst314

Akshullly….back around 1983 or so Neil said some rather positive things about Ronald Reagan...

Thank you for that. It's good to get these things right, and I would hate to make an error and have it just sit there unchallenged.

Watcher In The Dark

Spam has been mentioned. I haven't read all the replies, but... Spam Fritters, anyone?

Okay, maybe my tastes are terrible. after all, I used to eat Golden Syrup sandwiches. And I ate them shamelessly!

Watcher In The Dark

@pst314: about that A10 Warthog 'cow hit'. I believe in WW2 a British submarine off the coast of North Africa launched a torpedo at a ship landing German tanks. The torpedo missed the ship, slid up the beach and hit a tank. As these things were recorded, the sub's 'Jolly Roger' with outlines of sunk ships on it was joined by the silhouette of a tank.

One takes one's successes where one can find them.

pst314

Spam Fritters, anyone?

Ahem. This is not a judgement-free space.

ate them shamelessly

Shame is available here at no extra charge. It's those little extras that tell you this is a high-class establishment.

I used to eat Golden Syrup sandwiches

When I was very young I occasionally ate buttered bread sprinkled with cinnamon sugar. My uncle's usual school lunch was several lard sandwiches--but that was during the Great Depression.

pst314

As these things were recorded, the sub's 'Jolly Roger' with outlines of sunk ships on it was joined by the silhouette of a tank.

One takes one's successes where one can find them.

A mere tank would only entitle them to return to port with a whisk broom tied to the periscope. :-D

Baceseras

When I was very young I occasionally ate buttered bread sprinked with cinnamon sugar

We had that too, toasted. Called it cinnamon toast.

asiaseen

I am surprised no one has mentioned beef dripping, either sandwiched or on a simple slice of bread, and especially the gourmet version with the jellified crunchy bits from the bottom. A healthy sprinkling of salt rounds off the food fit for gods.

Sgt Jackrum, normally a soldier of taste and refinement, prefers the slightly inferior pork dripping.

pst314

I am surprised no one has mentioned beef dripping

No, because the Yorkshire Pudding soaked them all up.

asiaseen

No, because the Yorkshire Pudding soaked them all up

Not so, the prudent British housewife would not squander all that valuable fat from the roast by turning it into gravy. Rather, she would take a little of the fat as a base and then bulk it out with water in which the cabbage (or other veg) had been boiled and then use the magic of Bisto to add flavour and colouring to the gravy. The rest of the fat (and the pan scrapings which add the gourmet bottom layer of a good dripping) is saved for another day.
Incidentally, beef dripping is the best for making chips (fries as they are known to the heathen).

I loathe thick gravy.

pst314

Not so, the prudent British housewife would not squander all that valuable fat from the roast by turning it into gravy.

We 'murricans like being imprudent. But in fact Mom only made gravy from part of the drippings: The rest was left in the bottom of the big skillet to cook the Yorkshire pudding, which made the pudding quite savory without pouring gravy over it like English farmers do. Fat from frying bacon was saved in a canister for use in cooking, just as ham bones were saved for stock and pea soup.

I loathe thick gravy.

Cardinal Fang has been notified. Expect a visit from the Flying Sin Squad later this morning.

asiaseen

Expect a visit from the Flying Sin Squad later this morning

I am on Quick Reaction Alert with my defensive weapons loaded with High Octane Gravy Salt. The gravy boats are already afloat.

pst314

The gravy boats are already afloat.

They will be quickly sunk by Fang's submarine sandwiches.

Alex

...just how poor they and many other Brits were in the immediate post-war years.

Have you read 84, Charing Cross Road? (A good book, in my opinion.) The same kind of thing is described there, where the writer (living in New York City) often sends food packages to her penpal in London, which he - living through that postwar austerity - greatly appreciates.

pst314

Have you read 84, Charing Cross Road?

Haven't heard of it. Checking Amazon, I see that there is unfortunately not an English-language Kindle edition. (Only French, Spanish, and Chinese. Odd.) But the local library network has a few printed copies. Thanks. Will add it to list.

I get the impression that kids today have no idea what life was like for our parents--during the Great Depression, right after WWII, etc.

asiaseen

Fang's submarine sandwiches

HA! No chance. They will be cut into small pieces by the carving knife and turned into croutons.

pst314

I have heard that some companies like Amazon strictly limit their employees' time for bathroom breaks, but this takes the cruelty to a new level.

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