Feeding On Failure
Daddy’s Baggage

Friday Ephemera

The situation did not improve. || Peekaboo with impunity. || Snack accepted. || Caught off guard. || Urge detected. || With magnets and cold aluminium. || A compilation of mishaps, near misses, and motorized morons. || And another. || Scenic route. || I expect your answers by the end of the day. || Dad skillz deployed. || He does this… er, pretty well, actually. || How to impress your friends. || How to impress your friends 2. || Playing with propane. || Invisible chair. || High anxiety. || And yes, he did survive. || Today’s words are hostage video. || How to confuse honeybees. || How to make a slightly bouncy egg. || Speaking of bouncing. || And finally, if you want all the bouncing, I can only offer you this.

Comments

mark

Oh, no. Idiots in Cars. That is a rabbit hole I can spend many hours digging in.

WTP

23A, though I could go as far as 14A. But A. Always A.

TimT

1 and 3, but there's just no need to go down the dark hole of instant coffee. Just make or buy an espresso.

Daniel Ream

Today’s words are hostage video

When you're getting flak because this list didn't contain enough trigger warnings, it's a "pray for an asteroid, not pick a side" moment.

Joan

And finally, if you want all the bouncing, I can only offer you this.

Howling. :-D

Darleen

13D ... just need some butter and jam on 3.

Mags

I expect your answers by the end of the day.

3/4/B

Mags

High anxiety

Way too stressful to watch this early.

David

Morning, all.

When you're getting flak because this list didn’t contain enough trigger warnings,

Pandering to the kinds of people who will never be satisfied, except, briefly, during their own little games of domination, doesn’t seem a good use of one’s time.

Way too stressful to watch this early.

Yes, it does get rather tense, especially when it becomes clear that the attempt is not going to work. I found it more alarming than I expected. I think it’s because the scale of the forces, and the level of danger, is easy to understand. It happened a few years ago, and despite a fall of 10 metres or so, and despite two broken heels, the chap subsequently made another, successful attempt.

Not entirely sure why, but there you are.

Mike D

I expect your answers by the end of the day.

3. 4. C.

What about our host?

David

What about our host?

Um, I do hate to be difficult, as you know, but… The toast would be somewhere around 4 or 5. I don’t like flaccid toast. The coffee would be A or B, depending on mood. And the steak… well, I’m not big on steak – it’s not something I would choose, so none of the above.

Stephanie Richer

4/4/C

sH2

Today’s words are hostage video.

The struggle sessions will continue until all novels are 'safe'.

Stephanie Richer

Pandering to the kinds of people who will never be satisfied, except, briefly, during their own little games of domination, doesn’t seem a good use of one’s time.

They will never be satisfied and you wind up the enemy, regardless of your orientation.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/the-new-homophobia-opinion/ar-AAWqh38

I said this just last month is a conversation with a friend, that I feel sorry for "straight" gay people. They are no longer queer and as with heterosexual people (please, I am not going to use the term "cis") in order to avoid condemnation they have to work extra hard to prove they are an "ally." And even then, they are still suspect.

Please note I used the word condemnation. I have seen that "queer" society seemingly cannot ignore, nor be intolerant of, a "non-ally." They are to be condemned. Even the use of the word "ally" is telling because what is someone who is not an ally? They are the enemy. No neutral Switzerland in the cultural war.

David

I said this just last month is a conversation with a friend, that I feel sorry for “straight” gay people.

The thing about people who are, as it were, professionally queer - activists, bangers-on about “social justice” and the alleged evils of our “cis-heteronormative” society, etc - is that they tend to be psychologically repellent. When someone who is just gay or whatever stumbles into their company, with all its rules and seething, and games of Gotcha!, and demands for fealty, the terms of which change on a near-weekly basis, you’d think they’d realise, quite quickly, that they’re surrounded by poseurs, wankers, and deeply unattractive monomaniacs. People who are neither good, nor good for you.

asiaseen

I expect your answers by the end of the day.
3 3 T

Trigger warnings

Who gets triggered (and why) by mention of foot-loving? Yes, I do have remnants from failing Latin O level (twice)

Captain Nemo

I expect your answers by the end of the day.

3, 3, C. Like our host, I'm not overly fond of steak, but I have it on occasion and when I do, it usually looks like 3.

MC

Re: The Pawn & the Puppet: bearing in mind the obvious masochistic leanings of the author, she probably deliberately included elements to annoy the tranny mentalists, so she could get off on the abuse.

From the article by the 'straight gay guy'.

queer theory, an obscure academic discipline based largely on the writing of the late French intellectual Michel Foucault

Ah, that would be Foucault the child rapist?

2 / 4 / C - ironically I disregarded my last hot cross bun while reading today's ephemera and toasted it to a 5/6.

David

ironically I disregarded my last hot cross bun while reading today's ephemera and toasted it to a 5/6.

No refunds. Credit note only.

Jacob

if you want all the bouncing, I can only offer you this.

A 'project for the weekend', as our host would say.

Jacob

Also flaccid toast.

David

Also flaccid toast.

In a slightly twee tea room, I was recently served poached eggs on toast. The eggs were fine (and they’re quite tricky to get right), but the toast was barely warmed, let alone browned. It could barely support its own weight.

I was tempted to storm over to the proprietress and shake her by the elbows.

ComputerLabRat

I expect your answers by the end of the day.

24E, although sometimes F is just the ticket, and on occasion, A, when I just need the caffeine.

These answers all look like bra sizes...

David

These answers all look like bra sizes...

[ Peers over spectacles, looks at ladies. ]

pst314

There is no crime culture. There is no crime culture. There is no crime culture. There is no crime culture.

pst314

Florida Man Woman.

pst314

Easter in England.

Megaladon

Did I see a kid accomplish something by taking his time, focusing, and carefully learning a process step by step under the guidance of someone who knew how to teach? Is that allowed on the internet?

pst314

Is that allowed on the internet?

Shhhh. Maybe they won't notice.

pst314

Having fun.

pst314

Not having fun.

ccscientist

"having fun": that is the most british image ever.
trigger warnings: This is how you ruin fiction, humor, and normal conversation. If you are offended by everything, then please go find a cave to live in, because humans are depraved and that is just how it is.

David

that is the most british image ever.

We all look like that. All the time.

David

See also, the mysterious medical condition known as blogger’s face.

pst314

Where's my house?

asiaseen

FTS - Flaccid Toast Syndrome

Is there a cure?

David

Flaccid Toast Syndrome

Toast should of course be reassuringly rigid. You should be able to tap it against things - a plate, a tea cup, a passing stranger - without worrying that it might bend. Which toast shouldn’t do.

#RulesOfToast

David

Also, band name. Obviously.

pst314

I don’t like flaccid toast.

Possibly relevant news.

WTP

Florida Man Woman.

That wedding was just down the road. Wonder why I wasn't invited.

Also, band name. Obviously.

I have a rather eclectic taste in music. As I tell friends/acquaintances (or used to), if you don't like my taste in music, if you find it annoying, just wait 4 minutes and it will annoy somebody else. That said, Flaccid Toast would be a pretty annoying band name likely to belong to a pretty annoying band. And whose bloody idea was it that the word 'flaccid' should have two 'c's in it? Come on, fess up. Was it the French?

pst314

And whose bloody idea was it that the word 'flaccid' should have two 'c's in it? Come on, fess up. Was it the French?

It was the Romans. But don't give up: It's been a while since Perfidious France has been properly anathematized here.

David

[ Glares across English Channel, shakes fist. ]

Governor Squid

|| Urge detected. ||

Now I'm reminiscing on the long hours spent building caves and tunnels through the drifts and piles of snow in the front yard. If we had a properly snowy winter, we could build a tunnel along the edge of the driveway where the snow piled up from our shoveling chores, and another along the road where the snowplows piled it up. Where these intersected, we'd get really big mounds of snow that we'd hollow out and turn into forts.

(I was seven years old when The Empire Strikes Back was released. It was an amazing time to live in the snowy north.)

Directrix Gazer

1-2/3/C

TomJ
[...]there's just no need to go down the dark hole of instant coffee.

The word instant is superfluous there. I, in the words of the poet, don't drink coffee, I take tea my dear...

Governor Squid

23A if I'm just having some buttered toast with my breakfast. 24A if the toast has to carry anything substantial. 23B if the coffee is bad.

(Though I'd really prefer a good cuppa tea, kthxbai.)

pst314

White liberal women: an inexhaustible supply of toxic narcissism.

Maynard G. Krebs

Full Shaw Quote: England and America are two countries separated by a common language and the English custom of pushing the dead down curvy slides on rugs while in full rigor.

I didn't get that last bit before today...

David

Where these intersected, we’d get really big mounds of snow that we’d hollow out and turn into forts.

As wee seedlings visiting grandparents, my cousin and I would build quite elaborate indoor forts, using upended furniture, cardboard boxes, sheets, and those orange plastic Hot Wheels tracks (for structural support, obviously). At one point, we had camouflage netting, though I can’t recall where that came from. I remember the ritual of our protests when the adults entered our kingdom, unbidden, and said they wanted the furniture back in order to sit down.

MC

good cuppa tea

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9A2UDllfCOY

Steve E

1 4 A

Flaccid toast is bread.

We built two kinds of forts--underground forts (hole in the ground covered with sheets of plywood; and aboveground forts (tree forts)--with the common element being a trapdoor. A good fort, above, below, or on ground, must have a trapdoor. We were always nicking hinges from our father's supply of hardware.

Governor Squid

Really good trap door on this one.

And thanks for the video, MC. That was delightful!

Governor Squid

|| With magnets and cold aliuiminiuim. ||

I physically winced at the end when he tried to play with the frozen magnets. Why would you think that a piece of metal at -200C would be any better for your fingers than a piece of metal at +200C?

David

aliuiminiuim

[ Fetches duelling pistols. ]

Daniel Ream

It's been a while since Perfidious France has been properly anathematized here

[ Glares across St. Lawrence River, shakes fist. ]

I was seven years old when The Empire Strikes Back was released. It was an amazing time to live in the snowy north

Since the Battle of Hoth is just Stalingrad, you can play it out on a tabletop with tiny tin soldiers[1] using any WWII game and it works a treat.

[1] I refuse to call it "miniatures wargaming". It's tin soldiers.

semi retired conservative

I was seven years old when The Empire Strikes Back was released. It was an amazing time to live in the snowy north.

So was I. And no it was not.

Nor has it been for a very long time.

Sam Duncan

I'm a simple soul. That parrot made my day.

Anyway, those vehicular idiots could probably do with this driving simulator of note.

“Though I'd really prefer a good cuppa tea, kthxbai.”

Ditto. In terms of colour, I'd say roughly equivalent to B or C. I'll go 33 on the others.

David

Via The Other Half, more dashcam dramas.

Around 30 seconds in, the white car seemingly goes to warp, taking with it the locals’ electricity.

Steve E

Really good trap door on this one.

Very cool. He is either single or soon to be divorced. That, or he has a very understanding wife. Mine would spend zero time in the "fort" except to come in and rearrange things to her liking.

pst314

I was seven years old when The Empire Strikes Back was released. It was an amazing time to live in the snowy north.

Buncha mere children around here!

[ Riffles through When I Was a Boy file for choice rants ]

pst314

Mine would spend zero time in the "fort" except to come in and rearrange things to her liking.

A good place for a root cellar or wine cellar.

asiaseen

Also, band name. Obviously.

With supporting act Marmalade

Ah! Already taken... (I am rather surprised to find they are still "active")

asiaseen

good cuppa tea

Though Jodhpur 2nd Flush does sound a little insalubrious

Steve E

I was seven years old when The Empire Strikes Back was released.

Well that makes me feel old. I was 20 when it came out.

Darleen

Um ... there are just some things you just gotta let go.

WTP

Hey, in a movie theater now…had to get here early so we don’t miss the coming attractions that I have no desire to see. Aaaaanyway…I know David was interested in seeing the new Dr. Strange thing. According to some wimpy little guy in a white t-shirt…named Julio I think…apparently there’s like a shitload of homework you’re gonna need to do. Something something multiverse something Deadpool (the only guy I recognized) something something something. Hope this helps.

WTP

Dude…second preview about Dr, Strange. Apparently it’s gonna be “unfathomably exciting”. Soooo….like…maybe extra charges of underwear. Or maybe just some booze. Gotta go…it’s something about abortion now so they must be serious…

pst314

Dude…second preview about Dr, Strange. Apparently it’s gonna be “unfathomably exciting”.

Is the hype reaching Shopping Channel levels? Maybe even Tik Tok influencer levels?

WTP

There were three, count 'em, THREE previews for the Dr. Strange thing. It must be something very important for The Narrative guys. I think there were only two other movie previews, one about Elvis and one about some girl who lives in the swamp in the South and of course is not understood by the dumbass rednecks. Wife says the book was good but looks like the movie doesn't care.

Pooklord

26A - I like my carbon pure.

David
“You need to buy a really short car, though, because you’re really short.”

Industriousness detected.

asiaseen

A question of size: https://twitter.com/i/status/1517486627672805377

Just imagine, as an artist, standing in front of the bare canvas of that final painting and thinking, Now, where do I begin?

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Well, OK, but why is he allowed to teach anyone?

asiaseen

he's covered in £52,000 worth of tattoos

Cost, maybe. Worth, I doubt it.

Back in the 1940s and before, Belle Vue in Manchester had a renowned circus. When I was about 5 or 6 I was taken to see it. One of the "acts" was The Tatooed Man - like that tosser, covered from head to foot (presumably also under his swimmers). All he did was parade round the ring flexing his muscles but ti terrified me. I had nightmares about it for a long time. I guess were I to see Mr £52,000 in the flesh those nightmares would be revived.

David

Well, OK, but why is he allowed to teach anyone?

Or, “Man with serious mental health problems chooses to permanently change his appearance so as to alarm and repel others, and is then shocked when said others don’t want him near children.” Because, says he, he’s teaching them “tolerance.”

Of what, exactly? Pathological self-involvement? Self-mutilation?

Are we not supposed to raise an eyebrow at people who inject ink into their eyes, risking blindness, while hoping to alarm small children? Should we pretend they aren’t broken and possibly dangerous?

pst314

Because, says he, he’s teaching them “tolerance.”

Of what, exactly? Pathological self-involvement? Self-mutilation?

Exactly that: tolerance of everything that is pathological.

Farnsworth M Muldoon

Exactly that: tolerance of everything that is pathological.

Meanwhile in California...

Farnsworth M Muldoon

World class trolling.

ccscientist

Paintings in real life: I visited Versailles and saw those massive paintings. The artist needed a ladder. He must have had to back up to see what he was doing 1000 times.

pst314

Hero father.

mak

He must have had to back up to see what he was doing 1000 times.

These guys were probably more like Hollywood set designers or top-end fashion designers, and not at all like tortured solitary geniuses. Impose a house style, draw up the broad plan, supervise their staff who put 99% of the paint to canvas, do the finishing touches for the high status clients.

Well, OK, but why is he allowed to teach anyone?

You can learn a lot from Lydia

chooses to permanently change his appearance so as to alarm and repel others, and is then shocked when said others don’t want him near children

https://davidthompson.typepad.com/davidthompson/2014/10/repent-at-leisure.html

You see, he should be free to deform his anatomy into eye-catchingly unattractive shapes, thereby announcing his heroic radicalism and disdain for bourgeois norms, entirely without consequence. But you mustn’t be free to run your business without him, regardless of whatever message he’s chosen to send via the medium of disfigured earlobes. No bad decision that he makes must ever “alter his life chances” because… well, obviously, it’s all your fault.
pst314

disdain for bourgeois norms

One of the lessons I learned was to shun those who disdain "bourgeois norms".

pst314

Star Trek weddings. Klingon weddings. And now this: Manly Bands sells wedding bands based on DC comic book characters.

[ Rolls eyes. ] I don't think these people understand what 'manly' means.

John

David Thompson found the same piece and has some typical, incisive points

and

This is the kind of guy whose writing David Thompson likes to monitor:

As our host is far too modest I thought I had better point out not one but two references in todays edition of Ace of Spades.

Darleen

Just imagine, as an artist, standing in front of the bare canvas of that final painting and thinking, Now, where do I begin?

Polish artist Jan Styka's The Crucifixion is 195 feet long and 45 feet high. Forest Lawn located it, bought it in 1943 and actually built an entire building just to house and display it.

WTP

You can learn a lot from Lydia...forgot about that one. However I prefer the more genuine enthusiasm of the original.

David

As our host is far too modest

Interesting theory.

I need links, dammit.

David

Ah, found.

[ Basks in own fabulousness. ]

John

https://ace.mu.nu/

Make that 3 name-checks.

WTP

Just saw that on Ace. He links to some video of a debating championship from EIGHT YEARS AGO. I remember that. I remember a lunch conversation about the decline in academics, about what people's children were encountering as they entered universities. I remember trying to tell people about how messed up things were in academia even back then. That maybe, just maybe a college degree (and now I remember it started with masters' degrees that all the young engineers felt that they had to have) was not worth the money, the wasted time, etc. I then brought up this debating championship video that I had just seen. Several people scoffed at me. None of whom possessed the intellectual curiosity to actually check it out. See, they were smart people. Smaaaaart. Middle-level managers at a major defense contractor. They knew right-wing nutjob paranoia when they heard it. Even if it came from someone they never heard right-wing paranoia nutjob stuff from before. Smart people. Making multiples of six figure incomes. Smaaaart. Now that I think about it, being in leadership positions perhaps they were trained to spot right wing nutjobs that they normally would not have noticed. That would certainly explain a few things.

Which is why things get worse and worse. It's all Donald Trump's fault, you know. And the fault of the kind of people who voted for him. Everything is and will remain fine if we just shut these rightwing racists up. Later, as stories started to come out about smart STEM schools like MIT going downhill...well, we'll have none of that nonsense either. Better stay away from that guy. Such things may go on at Bryn-Mawr (or however tf you spell it), but not at hallowed STEM institutions like Georgia Tech or MIT or Purdue. Just doesn't happen. Of course if you will just follow the logic of these philosophical debating contests you will understand...

asiaseen

Haute cuisine

From lower down in the Hero father comments:
My issue with this is there's still no vegan equivalent that's as good as McDonald's nugs/fries.

That speaks well for vegan food.

pst314

Is a social media war being waged against Mayim Bialik (Big Bang Theory actress)? For the last month or so I have been seeing ads on Facebook with variations on "allegations against Mayim Bialik have been confirmed" as if she has done something shockingly heinous. Or maybe this is a new style of tabloid journalism clickbait. (Remember the "a new tragedy for Jackie" headline when she was seen attending a Shakespeare play? Or was that satire?)

John

pst

I have been told, by someone considerably younger, that it’s a good humoured spoof about gummie bears. I don’t understand the why or how but it’s not designed for the likes of me.

pst314

a good humoured spoof about gummie bears

Kids these days. [ Shakes head. Resumes posting Keep Off Lawn signs. ]

WTP

Is a social media war being waged against Mayim Bialik (Big Bang Theory actress)?

I got tired or seeing that as well and looked it up. She wore the same burnt-orange jacket in two separate episodes. Which I highly suspect was either done or "outrage-recognized" on purpose so as to outrage about the outrage. Because women and men and wardrobes and...something Narrative something something...

pst314

[ Basks in own fabulousness. ]

Historian Victor Davis Hanson said very recently that Ace of Spades is one of the blogs that he reads regularly. So maybe he will follow some of those links to this Fine and Classy Establishment.

pst314

Via Charles Murray (of The Bell Curve): Breaking News: Elephant elected by acclamation to Monty Python's Committee for Putting Things on Top of Other Things.

pst314

Because women and men and wardrobes and...something Narrative something something...

Do not try to understand.

pst314

Incoming!

Richard Cranium
[...] Elephant elected [...]

Maybe the Chtaptisk Fithp left a mutant here after deciding not to invade.

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